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[cruel_emo_girl]

thizzed last night with the boys. lol jeramie was silly, chris was hilarious, johnny was sick fer a little bit:( (but he got better), aaron fucked some random guy up like a savage, james was walkin home hella thizzin,jesse was myspacin like a savage, i sat here on the phone with the boys all night thizzin, and jim..... was ..... thizzin yes, but oh so attractive to me last night. i talked to jim nd bronson most of the night... bronson... god. that boy kills me. i hella love him so much, and it kills me that i hurt him.... but what am i supposed to do? i cant be with him again. i cant. he is so wonderful. such a wonderful person. nd i reeli dunno what i would do without him half the time. he reeli is a big part of my life. i hated when he wasnt talking to me... i felt like shit like i had th eempty space cuz i hella loved him and prolly would have flown back into his arms in a heartbeat..... but.. he took too long. he never shouldve left if this was just gonna happen. but... i suppose everything thats happening right now is happening for a reason even if its killing my insides, breaking my heart and breaking other hearts. what am i supposed to do?
im not good at this.
im one little girl.
one person.... in one big world.
....................................... what am i doing to myself?

oh well.

chillin here to james or someone else calls then going to either james's house or wherever they wanna go.

<3 Ells