shaking in my boots in the early morn'
Soooo.....
Kurtis is currently sleeping under my bed like some kind of under the bed monster, because last night he came to visit me and he didn't have a place to stay, and because my mother (and father too) are completely out of there skulls with everything, I had to resort to shoving him underneith the abyss with the dust bunnies :(
The past few days have been extremely harsh on me. I feel my brain sizzling and my body is basically crippled with mental and physical exhausted, do to the fact that NOBODY has called me back regarding my future employment plans, my mother especially insists on making me feel like shit by disregarding anything I tell her regarding my future plans.
It was here specifically that told me to take time off from school, all because I was losing my head big time.
If I had stayed at that establishment dangerous things would have happened.
Every conversation I seem to have with them is like lighting a spark to gun powder. I'm working my ass of as best I can, with what little things I have. And if that isn't difficult enough, it seems that my mother has nothing but resentment towards my being.
I just can't take it anymore.
After I let the beast loose, by asking parents if Kurtis could stay over night cause he couldn't get back to his place later in the evening. It triggered a series verbal events that did nothing but cause me to sob and completely hate and resent the person I have become.
Because well...I am clueless as to what I want with anything. Except happiness.
After all was said and done, and my father being the rational one, sat me down and tried to put me on some sort of "plan" and we talked about "goals" and all sorts of inspiration hodge podge of that nature. I just couldn't and wouldn't have it, my brain had turned to mush by than, and it would have probably been wiser of him to discuss all that with me the next day.
But alas....here I am updating a thing that nobody ever reads, pouring myself out to a computer screen, while I grit my teeth imensely in hope that I don't get caught pulling shannanigans that a freshman in highschool would do. And for christ sake... I'm twenty fucking years old. I shouldn't be doing this.
With the exception of all the hysteria that has been circling about my in my house hold. Things have been ok I guess. I've been trying to keep my fun time and my adventures to there maximum potential, while including the ones I care most about around me. It's hard though. Over the past couple days I have really come to miss a lot of the really strong friendships that I should to have, that sort of fell apart when college came into place. People like Rose, Gina, Jess, Brian Lopez, and a list so long I can't even mention it, you just don't come by them to often. And I have to say those times that I have shared with those kids were good ones. And I'd give anything to bring that back. With the exception of people like Kurtis, and my recent hang out buddy Dana, I feel more and more alone everyday. And that is probably why myself and Kurtis get along so well together, is because we are both so used to sucking up the shit that collects around us.
If any of you kids take the time to read this at all. great. and thank you. But seriously If you havn't seen me in a while, it's not because I hate you or I'm to good for you or anything of that nature. I've just crippled myself with my daily routine. So please call me up or message me or something. I still love you kids
On a lighter note. I have a plethora of photos that are way over due. They are all happy and cute and fun, so don't worry no tear jerkers here.
it's a frumposaurus in a tree.
the lochness monster has come out of the water! Kurtis in all his aqua glory!
chris pretending to be Kurtis while waiting for the bus to the Renegade Craft Fair
sooo coooool!!!!
It was really hilarious. you should have been there
yeah i know it's pretty gay, actually super gay, but I really don't give a shit. cause it's true
seaside vs Coneyisland
oh i like this one. this is from mass amount of baby animal day at Kaities grad party. Yay! Horsesss!
And pupppiieesss! and boooysss!
And more puppiessss and super cutest boy everrrr!
passenger seat hole punx!
After working a hard sweat during tennis chris ran to go shoot a vitamin water commercial while uncle Kurto watched the chilluns!
mmmhmmmmmmm
<3
And master cylde in all of his glory!
Also: Kurtis is snoring real hard underneith my bed and it is super adorable/cute/hilarious
that is all.
Kurtis is currently sleeping under my bed like some kind of under the bed monster, because last night he came to visit me and he didn't have a place to stay, and because my mother (and father too) are completely out of there skulls with everything, I had to resort to shoving him underneith the abyss with the dust bunnies :(
The past few days have been extremely harsh on me. I feel my brain sizzling and my body is basically crippled with mental and physical exhausted, do to the fact that NOBODY has called me back regarding my future employment plans, my mother especially insists on making me feel like shit by disregarding anything I tell her regarding my future plans.
It was here specifically that told me to take time off from school, all because I was losing my head big time.
If I had stayed at that establishment dangerous things would have happened.
Every conversation I seem to have with them is like lighting a spark to gun powder. I'm working my ass of as best I can, with what little things I have. And if that isn't difficult enough, it seems that my mother has nothing but resentment towards my being.
I just can't take it anymore.
After I let the beast loose, by asking parents if Kurtis could stay over night cause he couldn't get back to his place later in the evening. It triggered a series verbal events that did nothing but cause me to sob and completely hate and resent the person I have become.
Because well...I am clueless as to what I want with anything. Except happiness.
After all was said and done, and my father being the rational one, sat me down and tried to put me on some sort of "plan" and we talked about "goals" and all sorts of inspiration hodge podge of that nature. I just couldn't and wouldn't have it, my brain had turned to mush by than, and it would have probably been wiser of him to discuss all that with me the next day.
But alas....here I am updating a thing that nobody ever reads, pouring myself out to a computer screen, while I grit my teeth imensely in hope that I don't get caught pulling shannanigans that a freshman in highschool would do. And for christ sake... I'm twenty fucking years old. I shouldn't be doing this.
With the exception of all the hysteria that has been circling about my in my house hold. Things have been ok I guess. I've been trying to keep my fun time and my adventures to there maximum potential, while including the ones I care most about around me. It's hard though. Over the past couple days I have really come to miss a lot of the really strong friendships that I should to have, that sort of fell apart when college came into place. People like Rose, Gina, Jess, Brian Lopez, and a list so long I can't even mention it, you just don't come by them to often. And I have to say those times that I have shared with those kids were good ones. And I'd give anything to bring that back. With the exception of people like Kurtis, and my recent hang out buddy Dana, I feel more and more alone everyday. And that is probably why myself and Kurtis get along so well together, is because we are both so used to sucking up the shit that collects around us.
If any of you kids take the time to read this at all. great. and thank you. But seriously If you havn't seen me in a while, it's not because I hate you or I'm to good for you or anything of that nature. I've just crippled myself with my daily routine. So please call me up or message me or something. I still love you kids
On a lighter note. I have a plethora of photos that are way over due. They are all happy and cute and fun, so don't worry no tear jerkers here.
it's a frumposaurus in a tree.
the lochness monster has come out of the water! Kurtis in all his aqua glory!
chris pretending to be Kurtis while waiting for the bus to the Renegade Craft Fair
sooo coooool!!!!
It was really hilarious. you should have been there
yeah i know it's pretty gay, actually super gay, but I really don't give a shit. cause it's true
seaside vs Coneyisland
oh i like this one. this is from mass amount of baby animal day at Kaities grad party. Yay! Horsesss!
And pupppiieesss! and boooysss!
And more puppiessss and super cutest boy everrrr!
passenger seat hole punx!
After working a hard sweat during tennis chris ran to go shoot a vitamin water commercial while uncle Kurto watched the chilluns!
mmmhmmmmmmm
<3
And master cylde in all of his glory!
Also: Kurtis is snoring real hard underneith my bed and it is super adorable/cute/hilarious
that is all.