(no subject)
It has been decided, I'm going to be moving somewhere as soon as possible.
I've just been having a whole episode of a month, it's just very strange and eye opening.
I would say I'm losing my mind but that's not really true, in fact I've been gaining some perspective. I've finally accepted the fact that I am a minority inside a minority inside a minority...and etc, etc, etc,...and this has caused me to think in some weird nihilistic way.
I can be alone now, which is amazing.
I am reading the most incredible book of my life so far, it's by Nancy Hertzberg, fucking incredible, brett easton ellis and chuck palahniuk have nothing on her, the depths into depravity that this woman has gone, it's completely amazing. "Frontier Inventory" is so fucking amazing, such an experience... The entire book start as some kind of journal, not really a journal, but like fragments of memory, this whole idea of remembering your life all over and relive every thing in it and in the book, it's not really a great life.
I mean, to write that beautifully and honestly is amazing. I wish Nancy Hertzberg was my mother! then I could have a whole fantasy thing going on where Chuck Palahniuk is my boyfriend and Brett Easton Ellis is my Father...
*sigh*
man, that is such a dorky fantasy...who the hell fantasizes about authors?
and that brings to mind, Geoffrey G. O'Brien would be the man that I have a passionate affair with to which chuck would respond by going crazy and killing Geoff (which is my pet name for him) while I start screaming "stop it! stop it! you're both tearing me apart" and then I'd shoot myself...
after a long black out session, I would wake up in a house where chuck palahniuk is acting like jack nicholson in 'the shining' and i have to get the fuck away from him despite the fact that I can only see out of one eye.
that also reminds me, I decided I wanted to be a filmmaker...because I am awesome.
first on the agenda, kids on the navajo reservation doing drugs and falling in love and then one of them dying in a car accident, but oh, here's the big twist and the total subversion of the plot, the one that is driving in the car when they flip over and all that shit is the one that abstained from sex, drugs and what have you...
man, I'm crazy.
I've just been having a whole episode of a month, it's just very strange and eye opening.
I would say I'm losing my mind but that's not really true, in fact I've been gaining some perspective. I've finally accepted the fact that I am a minority inside a minority inside a minority...and etc, etc, etc,...and this has caused me to think in some weird nihilistic way.
I can be alone now, which is amazing.
I am reading the most incredible book of my life so far, it's by Nancy Hertzberg, fucking incredible, brett easton ellis and chuck palahniuk have nothing on her, the depths into depravity that this woman has gone, it's completely amazing. "Frontier Inventory" is so fucking amazing, such an experience... The entire book start as some kind of journal, not really a journal, but like fragments of memory, this whole idea of remembering your life all over and relive every thing in it and in the book, it's not really a great life.
I mean, to write that beautifully and honestly is amazing. I wish Nancy Hertzberg was my mother! then I could have a whole fantasy thing going on where Chuck Palahniuk is my boyfriend and Brett Easton Ellis is my Father...
*sigh*
man, that is such a dorky fantasy...who the hell fantasizes about authors?
and that brings to mind, Geoffrey G. O'Brien would be the man that I have a passionate affair with to which chuck would respond by going crazy and killing Geoff (which is my pet name for him) while I start screaming "stop it! stop it! you're both tearing me apart" and then I'd shoot myself...
after a long black out session, I would wake up in a house where chuck palahniuk is acting like jack nicholson in 'the shining' and i have to get the fuck away from him despite the fact that I can only see out of one eye.
that also reminds me, I decided I wanted to be a filmmaker...because I am awesome.
first on the agenda, kids on the navajo reservation doing drugs and falling in love and then one of them dying in a car accident, but oh, here's the big twist and the total subversion of the plot, the one that is driving in the car when they flip over and all that shit is the one that abstained from sex, drugs and what have you...
man, I'm crazy.