escape

May 09, 2016 02:06

Hey, how badly do you want freedom?

Enough to tear your wrists from these cuffs, even if it means your palms coming off?

So badly that you'll cut off your feet so you can wriggle out of those chains around your ankles? How would you run then, with no feet, I wonder.

You'll realise first, it's harder to saw through bone than you thought, partly because of the pain of course; but mostly because you have to break the bones first - you didnt. The ankle is a pretty sturdy joint, you'd notice. This involves way more blood than you have ever seen, more pain too.

By that time you'll be asking yourself if the freedom is worth this mess. Would life be worth living without palms and feet? You're going to wonder if you ever truly wanted freedom in the first place - the pain makes you forget how badly you desired to be free.

Why is the price of freedom so ridiculous? Perhaps living here forever in chains isn't so bad after all; anything seems more comfortable than cutting off your own feet with a shard from a broken glass bottle surely.

Perhaps you'll bleed to death first before you can escape far from this place. It won't be worth it at all then. What was it that you wanted to gain from freedom - was there anything in particular you wanted to do?

You can't think of anything, just that you know, if you encage any creature they will inevitably desire only one thing: freedom, even if they don't fully know what that entails. Like any poor, simple creature you had wanted to be free merely because you were in captivity.

Right now is when you begin to appreciate the grim, bloody nature of freedom. Even the very first step involves more pain than you have thought possible - what of the rest? It is all shrouded by the darkest shade of uncertainty and you realise freedom may not be a desirable thing.

It always seemed so clear - being captured in chains was a bad thing; so freedom was the opposite. What were you going to do after you escaped? You had no plans for after the escape. At that time it seemed like the answer and the end of your suffering.

Who is going to stop your bleeding after you hack your foot off? Should you take your foot along so you can see it back later? Seems like a rather grotesque thing to do; it wouldn't even feel like a part of you anymore - just a creepy cold, dead foot. So foreign.

You hadn't thought of all that.

Did you still want freedom if it meant more suffering than being in captivity? Then, it wasn't really freedom that you desired, you only desired to stop suffering. But you're suffering now, and you're free. 

prose

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