[Tara] Disturbing behavior (no tag)
Tara had managed to avoid saying more than a couple of words to anyone for the rest of the morning, and a good part of the afternoon as well. She'd dug up some clams and brought them to the communal soup in progress, but slipped away again before anyone could talk to her. She saw Tommy talking to a man she'd never seen before, but she couldn't be certain. Her state of shock that had lasted for the first days after the crash had impacted her memory.
Now, Tara sat on a little dune, separate from the camp, but still within sight. Her embarrassment at the way she had acted at the Doctor's meeting was painful. It reminded her far too much of her youth, and her early days in Sunnydale. And she knew quite well that a stammer got worse if the person was emotional, and of course stammering could cause intense emotion, making a vicious circle. Sometimes all one could do was leave. But that didn't make it less humiliating.
She was thinking of Willow again. As difficult as it had been to leave her, she still loved her and missed her. Willow had been her first real love, and she had helped her to grow in so many ways. Shyness had left her in Willows arms. And then it had gone dark, as Willow misused her magic more and more, and finally began to manipulate the minds of those around her.
Now she was here, amid strangers, and aliens, and an enemy that seemed as hard to grasp as the waves themselves. She'd made the beginnings of friendships, and she had helped Tommy take his first step into the world of magic, and she wouldn't have missed that for anything. Still, Tara couldn't help but wonder how long they would all be there. She picked up a handful of sand and let it trickle through her fingers, remembering the words from a song she'd heard ages ago: 'solid stone is just sand and water and a million years gone by'. Would some future people find their bones, as the others had found the couple in the caves? Would anyone find them?
A shadow fell over her, and she jumped, startled out of her contemplation. She was also too startled to be fearful.
A man was standing there, blocking the sun, and she couldn't see his face. Only a silhouette against the light.
Tara stood up and said,"What do you want?" Her tone wasn't overwhelmingly friendly.
He seemed to slump a little, and almost shrink into himself. "I'm s-s-sorry, I... I didn't m-mean to scare you."
Facing him now, she recognized him from around the camp, and her pulse slowed. She couldn't remember his name, but that was nothing new, and hearing him stammer as she did softened her towards the man. "It's alright, you just surprised me." She held out her hand, "I'm Tara, I'm sorry, I don't remember your name?"
"My name is Ethan," he replied, the stammer not in evidence now.
He didn't take her hand, and after a moment she let it drop, feeling awkward. He just looked at her, head a little tilted to one side, as if he was sizing her up. That was odd, and made her uncomfortable too.
"Ethan," she repeated, "Nice to meet you. Did you come over to tell me something?" He had nothing in his hands, so he obviously hadn't brought her anything. And why else would a stranger, of sorts, make the effort to walk out to her spot?
He slumped again, looked down and said, "Oh... n-no, I j-just... I don't know, I just w-w-wanted to see if you were okay...." Now the stammer was back, and he almost projected helpless innocence. Tara realized that was exactly what he was doing: 'projecting'. His shy manner was an act, and she took a step backward without thinking about it.
His hand moved so fast she didn't even see it, and then he was holding her wrist. He was looking at her again too, and all her danger senses were going off.
Ethan let go, just as she began to twist herself free, and he blushed and looked down again. Tara resisted the twin urges to wipe her skin clean where he had touched her and run towards the camp as fast as possible. Logically, she knew that nothing could happen to her here out in the open. And she was starting to get angry now. "What the hell did you do that for?" she said, raising her voice just a bit.
Now it was Ethan's turn to take a step back, and he mumbled something. When she asked again, he said more clearly, "I t-thought you w-were going to fall... off the d-d-dune... I'm s-s-sorry."
Tara did rub her wrist then, she couldn't help herself. She felt almost sticky there, unclean. This Ethan was seriously creeping her out. Maybe this was his idea of flirting or something, but even if she had been straight, she couldn't imagine being attracted to him. In fact, she didn't want to be near him anymore.
"Look, I don't know why you came over," Tara stooped and gathered up her shoes and over-shirt. "But I'm really not in the mood for company right now." She took several steps away from him, backing away, and then she turned and walked down the dune, feeling his eyes on her back. She looked back once, only to see him still up there, a faceless silhouette again, staring down at her.
She headed back to the camp, the embarrassment of earlier subsumed in the disturbing encounter she'd just had.
Now, Tara sat on a little dune, separate from the camp, but still within sight. Her embarrassment at the way she had acted at the Doctor's meeting was painful. It reminded her far too much of her youth, and her early days in Sunnydale. And she knew quite well that a stammer got worse if the person was emotional, and of course stammering could cause intense emotion, making a vicious circle. Sometimes all one could do was leave. But that didn't make it less humiliating.
She was thinking of Willow again. As difficult as it had been to leave her, she still loved her and missed her. Willow had been her first real love, and she had helped her to grow in so many ways. Shyness had left her in Willows arms. And then it had gone dark, as Willow misused her magic more and more, and finally began to manipulate the minds of those around her.
Now she was here, amid strangers, and aliens, and an enemy that seemed as hard to grasp as the waves themselves. She'd made the beginnings of friendships, and she had helped Tommy take his first step into the world of magic, and she wouldn't have missed that for anything. Still, Tara couldn't help but wonder how long they would all be there. She picked up a handful of sand and let it trickle through her fingers, remembering the words from a song she'd heard ages ago: 'solid stone is just sand and water and a million years gone by'. Would some future people find their bones, as the others had found the couple in the caves? Would anyone find them?
A shadow fell over her, and she jumped, startled out of her contemplation. She was also too startled to be fearful.
A man was standing there, blocking the sun, and she couldn't see his face. Only a silhouette against the light.
Tara stood up and said,"What do you want?" Her tone wasn't overwhelmingly friendly.
He seemed to slump a little, and almost shrink into himself. "I'm s-s-sorry, I... I didn't m-mean to scare you."
Facing him now, she recognized him from around the camp, and her pulse slowed. She couldn't remember his name, but that was nothing new, and hearing him stammer as she did softened her towards the man. "It's alright, you just surprised me." She held out her hand, "I'm Tara, I'm sorry, I don't remember your name?"
"My name is Ethan," he replied, the stammer not in evidence now.
He didn't take her hand, and after a moment she let it drop, feeling awkward. He just looked at her, head a little tilted to one side, as if he was sizing her up. That was odd, and made her uncomfortable too.
"Ethan," she repeated, "Nice to meet you. Did you come over to tell me something?" He had nothing in his hands, so he obviously hadn't brought her anything. And why else would a stranger, of sorts, make the effort to walk out to her spot?
He slumped again, looked down and said, "Oh... n-no, I j-just... I don't know, I just w-w-wanted to see if you were okay...." Now the stammer was back, and he almost projected helpless innocence. Tara realized that was exactly what he was doing: 'projecting'. His shy manner was an act, and she took a step backward without thinking about it.
His hand moved so fast she didn't even see it, and then he was holding her wrist. He was looking at her again too, and all her danger senses were going off.
Ethan let go, just as she began to twist herself free, and he blushed and looked down again. Tara resisted the twin urges to wipe her skin clean where he had touched her and run towards the camp as fast as possible. Logically, she knew that nothing could happen to her here out in the open. And she was starting to get angry now. "What the hell did you do that for?" she said, raising her voice just a bit.
Now it was Ethan's turn to take a step back, and he mumbled something. When she asked again, he said more clearly, "I t-thought you w-were going to fall... off the d-d-dune... I'm s-s-sorry."
Tara did rub her wrist then, she couldn't help herself. She felt almost sticky there, unclean. This Ethan was seriously creeping her out. Maybe this was his idea of flirting or something, but even if she had been straight, she couldn't imagine being attracted to him. In fact, she didn't want to be near him anymore.
"Look, I don't know why you came over," Tara stooped and gathered up her shoes and over-shirt. "But I'm really not in the mood for company right now." She took several steps away from him, backing away, and then she turned and walked down the dune, feeling his eyes on her back. She looked back once, only to see him still up there, a faceless silhouette again, staring down at her.
She headed back to the camp, the embarrassment of earlier subsumed in the disturbing encounter she'd just had.