The Pain of Failure
I'm getting really depressed over this. I can't believe where I've ended up. I'm 31 years old and have no future. I could be dead right now, and it wouldn't matter.
I wish I knew how to get out of this. Even if I had waited to quit, it would have been a matter of quitting now or later. Maybe I should have quit when I was originally going to. I might be employed by now. Or in a worse situation.
I just don't understand how to live in the world. I hate being born. I hate that I've had to live this long. Why did my parents have me? Why have children only to not try and guide them to success?
I'm so over this area. Once I leave, I'm never coming back. Ever. I've been here too long, and refuse to stay longer. Something will give, and things will be fine. Until then.... it's a matter of patience.
Target will start eventually. Seventy hour work weeks will suck, but at least I'll have money, stability, and a slow way out.
God I wish I could just die.
I've never felt so much hate. So much anger. PGI warped my personality in a bad direction. I'm going to be horrifically picky going forward. There is no point in finding just one employer. People will switch multiple times. More accurately, employers will throw out multiple people.
How do these people function? Someone has to be keeping them alive. If people were unemployed for that long, they'd starve eventually. And people STILL want to have children?
I don't get it. And I don't know what I've done wrong.
I wish I knew how to get out of this. Even if I had waited to quit, it would have been a matter of quitting now or later. Maybe I should have quit when I was originally going to. I might be employed by now. Or in a worse situation.
I just don't understand how to live in the world. I hate being born. I hate that I've had to live this long. Why did my parents have me? Why have children only to not try and guide them to success?
I'm so over this area. Once I leave, I'm never coming back. Ever. I've been here too long, and refuse to stay longer. Something will give, and things will be fine. Until then.... it's a matter of patience.
Target will start eventually. Seventy hour work weeks will suck, but at least I'll have money, stability, and a slow way out.
God I wish I could just die.
I've never felt so much hate. So much anger. PGI warped my personality in a bad direction. I'm going to be horrifically picky going forward. There is no point in finding just one employer. People will switch multiple times. More accurately, employers will throw out multiple people.
How do these people function? Someone has to be keeping them alive. If people were unemployed for that long, they'd starve eventually. And people STILL want to have children?
I don't get it. And I don't know what I've done wrong.