Why am I always the mommy?

[crkbaby192]

My new years eve was ok, and I mean just ok. I wish it was something so exciting that I would tell everyone but nope. It was fun don't get me wrong but before midnight it was ruined. Matt started drinking pretty heavily right off the bat so I knew he was going to get sick but I was hoping I would actually get to ring in the new year with him. I did get to ring it in with him but not the way I was picturing it (not at all). Yeah I was just hoping my boyfriend would get piss ass drunk and I would be ringing in the new year rubbing his back while he pucked up his guts into the toilet, (how romantic?) Then again Matt ever be romantic, maybe but not with me. So happy new years to everyone I truly hope yours was at least 6x better than mine. I hope you at least got to see the fireworks and not swedish meatballs coming up into a toilet mixed with vodka. I am amazed that I did not puck myself. Well that will be a good memory to have while Matt leaves for St. Louis. He's leaving and all I have not to remember him by is the nasty smell of regurgitated vodka and swedish meatballs. I doubt he even knows that I am semi-mad at him but I can't blame him. Just because I'm his girlfriend I'm not going to cut him off, he can do whatever he wants. I have no control over him ( and if I do I'm not using it). Why am I always so stupid? Even if it wasn't Matt pucking, lets say it was Andy or Adam, hell even Rob I would have been sitting in the bathroom with them too. It's not just Matt, sorry if he felt special but I care about all my boys. I really feel sorry for Emily, I brought her with me and I ended up ditching her, I hope the boys were treating her nice, I don't think they would have been mean but I still feel really bad about that. I'm sorry EMMY!!! IOU one, a big one! I think Tom could sense I was a little mad at Matt or maybe he thought Em was cute but he offered Matt's car to drive us all the way back home instead of taking us to the train, which I am very thankful for, (Tom if you ever stumble upon this, THANK YOU!) Since they drove us home I told them I would take them to dinner but when we got home I mentioned going out to my parents and we all ended up going to dinner to this new italian place Biaggi's (not sure on the spelling, but close enough). The entire dinner or before the food was served was really interesting. It just made Tom and Matt think my dad is still part of the mob and in a way I can see where they are coming from. My dad was even telling some stories about the underworld as he called it. Then my dad was talking to Tom about what he was doing in school and they got on a huge business rant and well needless to say my dad likes Tom. He's a smart guy! I do wonder what it would be like if my parents met Matt's parents or even Tom's parents. I know my dad has seen and exchanged a few words with Tom's dad but not sat down and chatted with him. I have a feeling it could be real interesting. Matt's parents seem real mellow and relaxed where my parents have the tendency to be live wires and full of energy (especially if you give my dad his martini's and my mom some wine or another mixed drink). But I love my parents and just the way my family is. I think it would be real interesting if I ever did sit down and write a book about my family. I already had a titled picked out "The White Sheep - of a herd full of black ones" or somewhere along those lines. Anyways, I think I'm going to finish "Lullaby" by Chuck Palahnuik.

Happy New Years to all!!!