How James Potter Wore Lily Evans Down
Title: How James Potter Wore Lily Evans Down (7/7)
Author: Cristofle (Liz)
Characters: James/Lily in the Marauder era; ensemble friendly for that time. Will include Sirius, Lupin, Wormtail, and Snape among others, including future Death Eaters as well as Order members.
Summary: "She vaguely heard her sister speaking and knew from the tone that whatever she was saying wasn’t polite, but she was too busy smoothing her hair and looking around the platform for a certain untidy black haired boy to pay attention to the words" James and Lily’s seventh year begins. Lily finds out, to her shock, the identity of her fellow Head Boy;) and at last lets herself fully fall for James Potter.
Spoilers: Spoilers through The Deathly Hallows
Disclaimer: If I owned anything, nobody would be named Hugo or Scorpius. I own nothing, JKR is queen and owns all things Harry Potter related. I only made up the two girls used to torment poor Lily in this chapter.
Author’s Note: Sorry this took so long; I’m busy this week! So, this is the last chapter of this, of my little story about how James got Lily to fall in love with him. I hope you’ve enjoyed it! Thanks for all the wonderful feedback. And no worries, there will certainly be stories about their seventh year and possibly beyond! As a final note, I know I don’t include Pettigrew much in this- I’m sorry, I know it’s not canon, but he’s in my top three most hated characters and I can’t bring myself to do it.
The Final Year
Lily was so nervous she didn’t even notice Petunia was being rude.
She vaguely heard her sister speaking and knew from the tone that whatever she was saying wasn’t polite, but she was too busy smoothing her hair and looking around the platform for a certain untidy black haired boy to pay attention to the words. Had nothing changed between last year’s train ride and this one, she would have been eager to show her Head Girl badge to all her friends- but everything had changed in a year.
James had written, as he promised, even sent sweets from Honeydukes when she mentioned her family was dying for them- it did the trick she was suspecting it was intended for, her parents now loved him without even meeting him. Still, she hadn’t seen him all summer and even though his letters were sweet and funny and flirtatious and somehow full of promise, she was nervous.
“Looking for someone?”
She jumped at the sound of the voice she’d been imagining all summer, and her face lit up as she turned around and took in the sight of James Potter, grinning at her like she’d just turned around from him only a moment ago.
Yes, VERY many things had changed in a year.
“Hi,” she said a little breathlessly. She noticed he was wearing the wristband she’d given him and it was just grubby enough compared to the last time she’d seen it that she could tell he’d been wearing it all summer. Her heart lightened.
“…HOW people function with these dreadful birds around…”
James looked past her at the sound of Petunia’s voice, and his hazel eyes sharpened in what she knew to be mischief. He glanced at her and saw in her face the confirmation that this was in fact her irritating sister.
I couldn’t stop him even if I wanted to, Lily tried to assure herself, to explain why she wasn’t doing anything as he moved closer to Petunia.
“Daffodil, isn’t it?” James said cheerfully to Petunia. She started and her eyes went icy cold as she summed him up warily.
“Petunia,” she said stiffly. Lily worked not to laugh. She knew James was fully aware of what Petunia’s name was.
“Oh, right! Pansy.” Petunia opened her mouth to protest again, but James didn’t give her a chance. Lily was biting the inside of her mouth so hard it hurt. “And how was your summer?”
Petunia’s glare could have melted glass.
“Oh, come on, Tuney,” Lily said lightly, stepping up beside them. “You’ve been telling us all summer how your boyfriend got a prestigious job offer at that wonderful oil drill company.” She translated with her eyes to James. She has not shut up for one single second all summer about this. He grinned.
“He probably doesn’t even know what that means,” Petunia hissed, as if James couldn’t speak the English language. Lily flushed an angry red at her sister’s outrageously rude behavior, but James didn’t appear to be bothered by it.
“As in dragon oil?” James asked solemnly, and Lily had to work to choke back another laugh- she knew perfectly well there was no such thing and it didn’t even make any sense, but it wouldn’t matter to Petunia. “Your boyfriend should really be careful; that’s a dangerous job.” Petunia was now looking at him like he was an entirely dangerous foreign species.
“How was your summer, James?” Lily asked politely, praying he wouldn’t let her down.
“I spent half of it wrestling trolls,” James returned without batting an eye. “Another couple weeks placing your Prime Minister under a spell so he wouldn’t know I’ve been controlling the weather.” Petunia now looked absolutely horrified and was backing away as fast as she could. “Nice to meet you, Carnation!” he called after her.
Lily broke into giggles as soon as Petunia was out of earshot. “You are HORRIBLE,” she protested even though she couldn’t put any real recrimination behind the words. “She’ll be having delusions about dragons and trolls and bizarre weather for weeks. And you know what her name is.”
“Yep,” James said breezily. “I do.”
Lily broke out giggling again. It faded a little as she let her eyes run over his face. “It’s good to see you,” she said softly, her laughter fading but a huge smile remaining.
“I missed you,” James said honestly, and Lily felt her grin widening even more as she flushed pink with pleasure. She glanced up at the clock and sighed a little as she saw that it was time to get on the train.
“I’ll find your compartment after I’m done patrolling the corridors,” she said a little wistfully.
James just smiled enigmatically. “Congratulations on making Head Girl.” And with a wink, he was gone.
James’s words brought up an internal topic she’d been wondering about but forgotten in the face of seeing him again- even as she hugged her parents good-bye, she was pondering the thought.
She had no idea who her fellow Head Boy was.
Maybe Remus, she thought hopefully. She didn’t think Professor Dumbledore would be cruel enough to appoint a Slytherin, but the two Ravenclaw prefects in her year were both girls and the male Hufflepuff prefect was a nice enough bloke but didn’t seem like he’d even want Head Boy.
“Ah, Miss Evans!” Professor McGonagall motioned her forward as she came out of the carriage where her friends were sitting after putting her luggage in there. “I have to Disapparate to outside the grounds in a moment, but I thought it prudent to give you and the new Head Boy time to…discuss matters.” For a bizarre moment, Lily almost saw McGonagall’s eyes dance with something that looked like amusement, but she was beckoning her forward again and sweeping off leaving Lily to follow before she could ask questions.
“Here you are,” Professor McGonagall said briskly, motioning into a small carriage towards the front. “You two may talk in here for a bit, then it would be best to talk to the prefects briefly about plans this year- I need not mention that security of students should be your first and foremost concern in these troubled times.”
“Of course, Professor,” Lily nodded, then stepped into the carriage.
Her jaw dropped.
James was lounging on a seat, grinning up at her.
Lily gaped at him, then whirled to face Professor McGonagall, whose lips twitched ever so slightly. “Well, I’ll be off!” she said crisply, and with that vanished.
“I’ve been waiting and waiting for my partner to arrive!” James said brightly.
Lily, feeling like she’d been smacked over the head with something very large, turned back around, just mouthing wordlessly for a moment. Finally, she snapped out of it. “How could you not TELL me?!” she demanded, going over to him and shoving him as she flopped down beside him.
“Hey!” he protested, laughing. “You must admit- the look on your face made the surprise worthwhile.”
“How in the name of Merlin did THIS happen?” Lily asked incredulously, then blushed a little. “Not that you won’t…be competent.”
James held up a hand, still laughing. “Don’t worry, no one was more shocked than me. Except for Padfoot. Whom I think is still in mourning. He’s convinced his best friend died and has been replaced with someone else. Professor Dumbledore actually came to deliver the news personally- I think he knew I’d never believe it otherwise.”
“I thought you had to be a prefect to be Head Boy,” Lily said, utterly baffled.
“I am apparently one of four in the last five hundred years that has not been a prefect first,” James acknowledged.
“Why?” Lily asked, still shocked, then blushed again.
“Eventually, one of these notes of shock and disbelief will hit my ego,” James pretended to sigh. “In all seriousness, Dumbledore noted my drastically improved behavior last year and said I have an effortless ability to make people listen to me- my mother was so proud, it may have been the first time she didn’t secretly wish she had a daughter- and so he believed it was time for me to have some authority.” He lifted his shoulders in a ‘who knows’ gesture, taking out the Head Boy badge from his pocket and pinning it on his sweater. “Padfoot will NEVER let me live this down,” he commented a little glumly.
Now that the initial shock was wearing off, Lily could see the logic behind the madness- she remembered the fight last year, how so many had stood behind James, how they’d only backed down when he did. They lived in dangerous times, and James, troublemaker though he may be, didn’t underestimate that. He despised the Dark Arts. Students might listen to him even if they wouldn’t listen to teachers. “So, how are we going to set up a system of disciplinary action and order?” she asked primly, clasping her hands together and allowing only a flicker of her amusement to show.
“Well, first off. Fanged Frisbees should really not be outlawed…” James began, and laughed as she smacked him again. In the end, he grudgingly agreed to let her take the lead for now, and allowed her to speak to the prefects- he was having too good a time with the expressions of the Slytherin prefects to be that annoyed at her strict rules. Remus spent the entire meeting looking like he was trying not to laugh. Eventually, they broke up and Lily dragged James along to patrol with her- granted, he didn’t seem too displeased since the activity involved her. Finally, they came across Sirius and Peter in their carriage.
“I can’t even look at you,” Sirius said dramatically when James came in, pointedly staring out the window. “You’ve corrupted him. CORRUPTED him, Evans. A mere shell of my best mate remains…”
Lily giggled at James threw a Chocolate Frog at Sirius’s head.
It occurred to her that even through breathless romantic uncertainty, she still felt…at ease with James.
At home with James.
“Lily!” Mary popped in the carriage. She flushed red at the sight of Sirius. “Um…your presence is needed back in our carriage,” she said in a small voice, then vanished again.
Lily sighed and got up. “Well, that’s my cue.”
“Hey.” James caught her by the hand and walked with her right outside of the carriage. “Meet me by the fire in the common room at midnight?” he asked in a low voice.
Lily smiled, happy that he didn’t seem to like the idea of putting what was between them aside anymore than she did. “It’s a date,” she said softly back. He grinned and tapped her on the nose, then went back into his carriage.
The feast was somehow bittersweet.
For the first time, it hit Lily that she’d never come to another of the first night feasts, at least not as a student. After this year, she’d be as finished with her schooling as she’d ever be, and have to figure out what it was she wanted to do with her life.
It was also the first time she fully appreciated having Sirius as a friend and James as a…whatever he was- they distracted her before she could get too emotional after Professor Dumbledore finished his speech. Sirius was still taunting James mercilessly about being Head Boy, and James was getting progressively more annoyed.
“Y’know, I could actually give you a detention,” he threatened at length.
Sirius gave a long, deep, overdramatic gasp. Lily couldn’t help but giggle. “You would NOT. You would not dare. All the information I have on you-”
“Are you blackmailing our Head Boy?” Lily joined in, mock shock written across her features.
“I think he is, Lily,” Remus said solemnly.
“Come to think of it, we could ALL give him detention,” James commented, a mischievous grin stealing across his face.
“I hate you all,” Sirius said haughtily, and pointedly turned his back on them to start a conversation with a brilliantly red Mary.
“Would you actually give him a detention?” Lily whispered to James.
James snorted. “Not a chance. He knows so much about things I’ve…” Lily raised her brows inquiringly. “He is my best friend!” he hastily changed tracks. “That is a…deeply sacred bond, full of trust and respect…” Lily just shook her head and laughed.
As the feast wound down, Lily felt her nostalgia and sappy memories fade away as butterflies started to explode in her stomach- soon enough, she and James would be alone for the first time in months. Still, as the Gryffindors made their way up to the common room and James got distracted by people asking about Quidditch try-outs, she found herself walking upstairs with Remus, and her thoughts drifted to him as she noted how pale he looked. “Have a good holiday?” she asked tentatively.
Remus smiled tiredly, then took a closer look at her and had an odd expression on his face like he’d made a decision about something. Before she could ask him what he was thinking, he’d quietly taken her by the elbow to a discreet corner of the common room. “I know that you know,” he said softly.
Lily blinked. There could be no mistaking what he was talking about. “James didn’t tell me,” she said hastily, first jumping to the defense of the only person who might have told her.
Remus smiled faintly. “I know that. I trust James completely.”
“Remus…” Lily looked at him helplessly. “I don’t think about it a lot, honestly, unless you look ill. I think we really became friends last year…”
“We did,” Remus confirmed, still smiling a little.
“And I only ever really thought of you as my friend.”
“Thank you,” Remus said quietly. “That means a lot to me. And when I asked James if you knew, and he admitted that you did, he told me how long you know and honestly, I didn’t have any clear cut sign to that effect, and I appreciate it.” A dull flush went over his pale skin. “I still don’t want to talk about…”
“That’s fine,” Lily said hastily, struggling to make him feel at ease. “We don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to talk about.”
“I just wanted to…thank you,” he said softly, now more speaking to the floor than her. “Not everyone would have…reacted the way you did, and you’ve kept quiet, and you’ve…”
Become my friend anyway.
He didn’t voice the thought, but she heard it in what he wasn’t saying, and she smiled slightly, reaching out to touch his hand. He just smiled again, but the acknowledgment seemed to have taken all of his courage, so he stepped away without saying anything else. Sirius caught her eye from across the room, and simply smiled and gave her a grateful nod.
I suppose I am officially part of their group.
The next hour or so seemed to go on forever and fly by in a second, all at the same time. As she and James, on opposite sides of the common room, locked eyes at least once a minute, people dwindled out of the common room one by one. Finally only Sirius- who clearly knew what was going on- remained, and with a grin and a wink, he was gone, too. James gave her a smile that seemed surprisingly nervous as he came over to her. “Alone at last,” he said a little huskily.
She nodded, unconsciously wringing her hands. “Alone at last.”
It was somewhat bizarre, the part of her that wasn’t terrified noted- James was completely void of his usual confidence and carelessness and looked a solid five years younger than his actual age for it, in his nervousness and clear eagerness for this to go his way, mixed with a fear that it wouldn’t. James had never been good at hiding his emotions, and this didn’t appear to be an exception. “Look, if you’ve changed your mind or something…just want to be friends…I wouldn’t hold it against you,” he suddenly blurted out. “Last year was…intense…and, you know…”
Somehow, in the face of his fear, her own faded. Smiling slightly, she reached out and pressed a finger against his lips. He fell utterly silent at the feel of her skin against his mouth and just blinked at her with his huge hazel eyes. “James,” she said softly. “Do you really think feelings that could make my Patronus be a companion to yours amount to a silly, flighty crush that would fade over a summer apart?”
James opened his mouth, then closed it again, looking somewhat shocked. “I…I don’t think I ever really expected this to happen,” he finally admitted with surprising candor. “I think I thought I’d have a crush on you while you considered me an arrogant specky git forever.”
“Is it just a crush?” Lily asked softly.
James studied her face for a moment. “No,” he quietly admitted at length.
Lily just nodded. “Not for me either,” she smiled slightly, although she felt oddly close to tears.
James lifted his shoulders. “Sometimes you want something- someone- for so long, and you get to a point where you don’t really expect it to actually ever work out…”
It was either courage or insanity that caused Lily to move forward. Looking back, she’d never be sure which. There was just something about James, being so open about how he’d wanted her for so long, that made her decide that this final move needed to be hers. In one quick, smooth movement, she stepped up to him, stood on her tiptoes, and kissed him.
The world exploded. That was really the only way to describe it, she decided in a daze. He was obviously shocked for an instant, but quickly recovered and slid one arm around her back, using his other hand to cup the back of her head and pull her closer. As his mouth opened to hers, as his tongue slid against hers, all the emotion of the year- maybe of years before it, as little moments where she’d been charmed or attracted or impressed and refused to acknowledge it- flowed between them. What they could not yet say, as teenagers who were still so uncertain by nature, was somehow shared in the kiss.
This was more than a teenage fling. Something about whatever was between the two of them felt more like forever.
She curled her fingers in his messy black hair, unconsciously messing it up even more in the way she’d once hated as they continued to kiss, as they explored and tasted and drank each other. Even when they pulled apart, it was slowly and only ever so slightly, just enough to look into each other’s eyes.
Breathing a little heavily, James tucked a strand of her deep red hair behind her ear. “This…this is it, right? This is real.”
Lily nodded. “This is real,” she confirmed, her voice barely above a whisper, her smile so wide it felt as if it could almost break her face.
“It won’t be easy,” James warned, but even as he said it, he was grinning, leaning his head against hers. “There are…things…”
And there were. They were growing up in a state of war. No matter how much it might not matter to him, he was a pureblood and she was not, and it mattered to the one who was rapidly gaining power. Her oldest friend seemed destined to join him, and would bring that violent grudge to the mix, that was only bound to grow tenfold once he found out about them. They’d spent one year getting along and the five before at odds. There were plenty of things to consider, to worry over.
But right now…in this moment…none of it mattered. They were together, they’d finally broken through all the barriers, and none of the negative issues had a place in this night.
“It doesn’t matter tonight,” Lily said aloud. “Not tonight.”
James’s grin widened and he ducked his head closer to her mouth again. “Told you that you’d put me above the giant squid sooner or later,” he breathed against her mouth.
Lily shoved against his chest, even as she couldn’t help giggling. “Yes, well, he was taken tonight,” she pretended to sigh. “I suppose you’ll do.”
As their lips met again, despite all that was wrong in the world around them, for this one night, the future only seemed bright.
Author: Cristofle (Liz)
Characters: James/Lily in the Marauder era; ensemble friendly for that time. Will include Sirius, Lupin, Wormtail, and Snape among others, including future Death Eaters as well as Order members.
Summary: "She vaguely heard her sister speaking and knew from the tone that whatever she was saying wasn’t polite, but she was too busy smoothing her hair and looking around the platform for a certain untidy black haired boy to pay attention to the words" James and Lily’s seventh year begins. Lily finds out, to her shock, the identity of her fellow Head Boy;) and at last lets herself fully fall for James Potter.
Spoilers: Spoilers through The Deathly Hallows
Disclaimer: If I owned anything, nobody would be named Hugo or Scorpius. I own nothing, JKR is queen and owns all things Harry Potter related. I only made up the two girls used to torment poor Lily in this chapter.
Author’s Note: Sorry this took so long; I’m busy this week! So, this is the last chapter of this, of my little story about how James got Lily to fall in love with him. I hope you’ve enjoyed it! Thanks for all the wonderful feedback. And no worries, there will certainly be stories about their seventh year and possibly beyond! As a final note, I know I don’t include Pettigrew much in this- I’m sorry, I know it’s not canon, but he’s in my top three most hated characters and I can’t bring myself to do it.
The Final Year
Lily was so nervous she didn’t even notice Petunia was being rude.
She vaguely heard her sister speaking and knew from the tone that whatever she was saying wasn’t polite, but she was too busy smoothing her hair and looking around the platform for a certain untidy black haired boy to pay attention to the words. Had nothing changed between last year’s train ride and this one, she would have been eager to show her Head Girl badge to all her friends- but everything had changed in a year.
James had written, as he promised, even sent sweets from Honeydukes when she mentioned her family was dying for them- it did the trick she was suspecting it was intended for, her parents now loved him without even meeting him. Still, she hadn’t seen him all summer and even though his letters were sweet and funny and flirtatious and somehow full of promise, she was nervous.
“Looking for someone?”
She jumped at the sound of the voice she’d been imagining all summer, and her face lit up as she turned around and took in the sight of James Potter, grinning at her like she’d just turned around from him only a moment ago.
Yes, VERY many things had changed in a year.
“Hi,” she said a little breathlessly. She noticed he was wearing the wristband she’d given him and it was just grubby enough compared to the last time she’d seen it that she could tell he’d been wearing it all summer. Her heart lightened.
“…HOW people function with these dreadful birds around…”
James looked past her at the sound of Petunia’s voice, and his hazel eyes sharpened in what she knew to be mischief. He glanced at her and saw in her face the confirmation that this was in fact her irritating sister.
I couldn’t stop him even if I wanted to, Lily tried to assure herself, to explain why she wasn’t doing anything as he moved closer to Petunia.
“Daffodil, isn’t it?” James said cheerfully to Petunia. She started and her eyes went icy cold as she summed him up warily.
“Petunia,” she said stiffly. Lily worked not to laugh. She knew James was fully aware of what Petunia’s name was.
“Oh, right! Pansy.” Petunia opened her mouth to protest again, but James didn’t give her a chance. Lily was biting the inside of her mouth so hard it hurt. “And how was your summer?”
Petunia’s glare could have melted glass.
“Oh, come on, Tuney,” Lily said lightly, stepping up beside them. “You’ve been telling us all summer how your boyfriend got a prestigious job offer at that wonderful oil drill company.” She translated with her eyes to James. She has not shut up for one single second all summer about this. He grinned.
“He probably doesn’t even know what that means,” Petunia hissed, as if James couldn’t speak the English language. Lily flushed an angry red at her sister’s outrageously rude behavior, but James didn’t appear to be bothered by it.
“As in dragon oil?” James asked solemnly, and Lily had to work to choke back another laugh- she knew perfectly well there was no such thing and it didn’t even make any sense, but it wouldn’t matter to Petunia. “Your boyfriend should really be careful; that’s a dangerous job.” Petunia was now looking at him like he was an entirely dangerous foreign species.
“How was your summer, James?” Lily asked politely, praying he wouldn’t let her down.
“I spent half of it wrestling trolls,” James returned without batting an eye. “Another couple weeks placing your Prime Minister under a spell so he wouldn’t know I’ve been controlling the weather.” Petunia now looked absolutely horrified and was backing away as fast as she could. “Nice to meet you, Carnation!” he called after her.
Lily broke into giggles as soon as Petunia was out of earshot. “You are HORRIBLE,” she protested even though she couldn’t put any real recrimination behind the words. “She’ll be having delusions about dragons and trolls and bizarre weather for weeks. And you know what her name is.”
“Yep,” James said breezily. “I do.”
Lily broke out giggling again. It faded a little as she let her eyes run over his face. “It’s good to see you,” she said softly, her laughter fading but a huge smile remaining.
“I missed you,” James said honestly, and Lily felt her grin widening even more as she flushed pink with pleasure. She glanced up at the clock and sighed a little as she saw that it was time to get on the train.
“I’ll find your compartment after I’m done patrolling the corridors,” she said a little wistfully.
James just smiled enigmatically. “Congratulations on making Head Girl.” And with a wink, he was gone.
James’s words brought up an internal topic she’d been wondering about but forgotten in the face of seeing him again- even as she hugged her parents good-bye, she was pondering the thought.
She had no idea who her fellow Head Boy was.
Maybe Remus, she thought hopefully. She didn’t think Professor Dumbledore would be cruel enough to appoint a Slytherin, but the two Ravenclaw prefects in her year were both girls and the male Hufflepuff prefect was a nice enough bloke but didn’t seem like he’d even want Head Boy.
“Ah, Miss Evans!” Professor McGonagall motioned her forward as she came out of the carriage where her friends were sitting after putting her luggage in there. “I have to Disapparate to outside the grounds in a moment, but I thought it prudent to give you and the new Head Boy time to…discuss matters.” For a bizarre moment, Lily almost saw McGonagall’s eyes dance with something that looked like amusement, but she was beckoning her forward again and sweeping off leaving Lily to follow before she could ask questions.
“Here you are,” Professor McGonagall said briskly, motioning into a small carriage towards the front. “You two may talk in here for a bit, then it would be best to talk to the prefects briefly about plans this year- I need not mention that security of students should be your first and foremost concern in these troubled times.”
“Of course, Professor,” Lily nodded, then stepped into the carriage.
Her jaw dropped.
James was lounging on a seat, grinning up at her.
Lily gaped at him, then whirled to face Professor McGonagall, whose lips twitched ever so slightly. “Well, I’ll be off!” she said crisply, and with that vanished.
“I’ve been waiting and waiting for my partner to arrive!” James said brightly.
Lily, feeling like she’d been smacked over the head with something very large, turned back around, just mouthing wordlessly for a moment. Finally, she snapped out of it. “How could you not TELL me?!” she demanded, going over to him and shoving him as she flopped down beside him.
“Hey!” he protested, laughing. “You must admit- the look on your face made the surprise worthwhile.”
“How in the name of Merlin did THIS happen?” Lily asked incredulously, then blushed a little. “Not that you won’t…be competent.”
James held up a hand, still laughing. “Don’t worry, no one was more shocked than me. Except for Padfoot. Whom I think is still in mourning. He’s convinced his best friend died and has been replaced with someone else. Professor Dumbledore actually came to deliver the news personally- I think he knew I’d never believe it otherwise.”
“I thought you had to be a prefect to be Head Boy,” Lily said, utterly baffled.
“I am apparently one of four in the last five hundred years that has not been a prefect first,” James acknowledged.
“Why?” Lily asked, still shocked, then blushed again.
“Eventually, one of these notes of shock and disbelief will hit my ego,” James pretended to sigh. “In all seriousness, Dumbledore noted my drastically improved behavior last year and said I have an effortless ability to make people listen to me- my mother was so proud, it may have been the first time she didn’t secretly wish she had a daughter- and so he believed it was time for me to have some authority.” He lifted his shoulders in a ‘who knows’ gesture, taking out the Head Boy badge from his pocket and pinning it on his sweater. “Padfoot will NEVER let me live this down,” he commented a little glumly.
Now that the initial shock was wearing off, Lily could see the logic behind the madness- she remembered the fight last year, how so many had stood behind James, how they’d only backed down when he did. They lived in dangerous times, and James, troublemaker though he may be, didn’t underestimate that. He despised the Dark Arts. Students might listen to him even if they wouldn’t listen to teachers. “So, how are we going to set up a system of disciplinary action and order?” she asked primly, clasping her hands together and allowing only a flicker of her amusement to show.
“Well, first off. Fanged Frisbees should really not be outlawed…” James began, and laughed as she smacked him again. In the end, he grudgingly agreed to let her take the lead for now, and allowed her to speak to the prefects- he was having too good a time with the expressions of the Slytherin prefects to be that annoyed at her strict rules. Remus spent the entire meeting looking like he was trying not to laugh. Eventually, they broke up and Lily dragged James along to patrol with her- granted, he didn’t seem too displeased since the activity involved her. Finally, they came across Sirius and Peter in their carriage.
“I can’t even look at you,” Sirius said dramatically when James came in, pointedly staring out the window. “You’ve corrupted him. CORRUPTED him, Evans. A mere shell of my best mate remains…”
Lily giggled at James threw a Chocolate Frog at Sirius’s head.
It occurred to her that even through breathless romantic uncertainty, she still felt…at ease with James.
At home with James.
“Lily!” Mary popped in the carriage. She flushed red at the sight of Sirius. “Um…your presence is needed back in our carriage,” she said in a small voice, then vanished again.
Lily sighed and got up. “Well, that’s my cue.”
“Hey.” James caught her by the hand and walked with her right outside of the carriage. “Meet me by the fire in the common room at midnight?” he asked in a low voice.
Lily smiled, happy that he didn’t seem to like the idea of putting what was between them aside anymore than she did. “It’s a date,” she said softly back. He grinned and tapped her on the nose, then went back into his carriage.
The feast was somehow bittersweet.
For the first time, it hit Lily that she’d never come to another of the first night feasts, at least not as a student. After this year, she’d be as finished with her schooling as she’d ever be, and have to figure out what it was she wanted to do with her life.
It was also the first time she fully appreciated having Sirius as a friend and James as a…whatever he was- they distracted her before she could get too emotional after Professor Dumbledore finished his speech. Sirius was still taunting James mercilessly about being Head Boy, and James was getting progressively more annoyed.
“Y’know, I could actually give you a detention,” he threatened at length.
Sirius gave a long, deep, overdramatic gasp. Lily couldn’t help but giggle. “You would NOT. You would not dare. All the information I have on you-”
“Are you blackmailing our Head Boy?” Lily joined in, mock shock written across her features.
“I think he is, Lily,” Remus said solemnly.
“Come to think of it, we could ALL give him detention,” James commented, a mischievous grin stealing across his face.
“I hate you all,” Sirius said haughtily, and pointedly turned his back on them to start a conversation with a brilliantly red Mary.
“Would you actually give him a detention?” Lily whispered to James.
James snorted. “Not a chance. He knows so much about things I’ve…” Lily raised her brows inquiringly. “He is my best friend!” he hastily changed tracks. “That is a…deeply sacred bond, full of trust and respect…” Lily just shook her head and laughed.
As the feast wound down, Lily felt her nostalgia and sappy memories fade away as butterflies started to explode in her stomach- soon enough, she and James would be alone for the first time in months. Still, as the Gryffindors made their way up to the common room and James got distracted by people asking about Quidditch try-outs, she found herself walking upstairs with Remus, and her thoughts drifted to him as she noted how pale he looked. “Have a good holiday?” she asked tentatively.
Remus smiled tiredly, then took a closer look at her and had an odd expression on his face like he’d made a decision about something. Before she could ask him what he was thinking, he’d quietly taken her by the elbow to a discreet corner of the common room. “I know that you know,” he said softly.
Lily blinked. There could be no mistaking what he was talking about. “James didn’t tell me,” she said hastily, first jumping to the defense of the only person who might have told her.
Remus smiled faintly. “I know that. I trust James completely.”
“Remus…” Lily looked at him helplessly. “I don’t think about it a lot, honestly, unless you look ill. I think we really became friends last year…”
“We did,” Remus confirmed, still smiling a little.
“And I only ever really thought of you as my friend.”
“Thank you,” Remus said quietly. “That means a lot to me. And when I asked James if you knew, and he admitted that you did, he told me how long you know and honestly, I didn’t have any clear cut sign to that effect, and I appreciate it.” A dull flush went over his pale skin. “I still don’t want to talk about…”
“That’s fine,” Lily said hastily, struggling to make him feel at ease. “We don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to talk about.”
“I just wanted to…thank you,” he said softly, now more speaking to the floor than her. “Not everyone would have…reacted the way you did, and you’ve kept quiet, and you’ve…”
Become my friend anyway.
He didn’t voice the thought, but she heard it in what he wasn’t saying, and she smiled slightly, reaching out to touch his hand. He just smiled again, but the acknowledgment seemed to have taken all of his courage, so he stepped away without saying anything else. Sirius caught her eye from across the room, and simply smiled and gave her a grateful nod.
I suppose I am officially part of their group.
The next hour or so seemed to go on forever and fly by in a second, all at the same time. As she and James, on opposite sides of the common room, locked eyes at least once a minute, people dwindled out of the common room one by one. Finally only Sirius- who clearly knew what was going on- remained, and with a grin and a wink, he was gone, too. James gave her a smile that seemed surprisingly nervous as he came over to her. “Alone at last,” he said a little huskily.
She nodded, unconsciously wringing her hands. “Alone at last.”
It was somewhat bizarre, the part of her that wasn’t terrified noted- James was completely void of his usual confidence and carelessness and looked a solid five years younger than his actual age for it, in his nervousness and clear eagerness for this to go his way, mixed with a fear that it wouldn’t. James had never been good at hiding his emotions, and this didn’t appear to be an exception. “Look, if you’ve changed your mind or something…just want to be friends…I wouldn’t hold it against you,” he suddenly blurted out. “Last year was…intense…and, you know…”
Somehow, in the face of his fear, her own faded. Smiling slightly, she reached out and pressed a finger against his lips. He fell utterly silent at the feel of her skin against his mouth and just blinked at her with his huge hazel eyes. “James,” she said softly. “Do you really think feelings that could make my Patronus be a companion to yours amount to a silly, flighty crush that would fade over a summer apart?”
James opened his mouth, then closed it again, looking somewhat shocked. “I…I don’t think I ever really expected this to happen,” he finally admitted with surprising candor. “I think I thought I’d have a crush on you while you considered me an arrogant specky git forever.”
“Is it just a crush?” Lily asked softly.
James studied her face for a moment. “No,” he quietly admitted at length.
Lily just nodded. “Not for me either,” she smiled slightly, although she felt oddly close to tears.
James lifted his shoulders. “Sometimes you want something- someone- for so long, and you get to a point where you don’t really expect it to actually ever work out…”
It was either courage or insanity that caused Lily to move forward. Looking back, she’d never be sure which. There was just something about James, being so open about how he’d wanted her for so long, that made her decide that this final move needed to be hers. In one quick, smooth movement, she stepped up to him, stood on her tiptoes, and kissed him.
The world exploded. That was really the only way to describe it, she decided in a daze. He was obviously shocked for an instant, but quickly recovered and slid one arm around her back, using his other hand to cup the back of her head and pull her closer. As his mouth opened to hers, as his tongue slid against hers, all the emotion of the year- maybe of years before it, as little moments where she’d been charmed or attracted or impressed and refused to acknowledge it- flowed between them. What they could not yet say, as teenagers who were still so uncertain by nature, was somehow shared in the kiss.
This was more than a teenage fling. Something about whatever was between the two of them felt more like forever.
She curled her fingers in his messy black hair, unconsciously messing it up even more in the way she’d once hated as they continued to kiss, as they explored and tasted and drank each other. Even when they pulled apart, it was slowly and only ever so slightly, just enough to look into each other’s eyes.
Breathing a little heavily, James tucked a strand of her deep red hair behind her ear. “This…this is it, right? This is real.”
Lily nodded. “This is real,” she confirmed, her voice barely above a whisper, her smile so wide it felt as if it could almost break her face.
“It won’t be easy,” James warned, but even as he said it, he was grinning, leaning his head against hers. “There are…things…”
And there were. They were growing up in a state of war. No matter how much it might not matter to him, he was a pureblood and she was not, and it mattered to the one who was rapidly gaining power. Her oldest friend seemed destined to join him, and would bring that violent grudge to the mix, that was only bound to grow tenfold once he found out about them. They’d spent one year getting along and the five before at odds. There were plenty of things to consider, to worry over.
But right now…in this moment…none of it mattered. They were together, they’d finally broken through all the barriers, and none of the negative issues had a place in this night.
“It doesn’t matter tonight,” Lily said aloud. “Not tonight.”
James’s grin widened and he ducked his head closer to her mouth again. “Told you that you’d put me above the giant squid sooner or later,” he breathed against her mouth.
Lily shoved against his chest, even as she couldn’t help giggling. “Yes, well, he was taken tonight,” she pretended to sigh. “I suppose you’ll do.”
As their lips met again, despite all that was wrong in the world around them, for this one night, the future only seemed bright.