long time no C
all of a sudden i remembered that i have a livejournal, and since im up and no one else is yet, this give me something to do. ive been up to a lot, and then again nothing important at all... i make shirts, clean, go to the playa, lay out on the tramp, watch movies, read the news on the internet, read the lorax like 45983759385 times, go to work, go out, get dolled up for cocktail parties, go on adventures to taco bell at wee hours in the morning, check out antique stores on the central coast with danielle, find new places to eat, do koala things with sarah, make huge meals (in particular b-fast) with the girls, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand.... thats about it. im s-to-the-icky right now which is no bueno, i got an hour of sleep last night thanks to hot flashes with cold sweats and cold flashes with hot sweats. i feel restless. and i dunno what i wanna do anymore. i feel like i dont have any future plans. i feel like im in this stagnant place. dont get me wrong, im having a blast, living with dani again is dominating all that is good, and the combination of me, dani and sarah is supreme. its kinda like living in a really hilarious tv show, except without the petty drama. but i just have this feeling that things are changing, and im staying the same. i dunno. i miss school...but i dunno what i would want to study even if i were in it. i wanna have some kind of impact on some people's lives but lately it seems like thats asking the impossible from some people. i wanna go somewhere and do something but i dunno where or what, and if i wanna go alone or not. yesterday on one of me and dani's driving adventures there was a point where no one was on this back road, it was only two lanes, surrounded by mountains, and it was really cool, new, beautiful...and i said to myself "it feels like we're driving to nothing", and she heard me and said "i like it" and i said me too. i dunno...it was just a good moment, but at the same time i got to thinking last night; is that how my life is going right now? am i content just riding on the breeze? im going somewhere, but is it okay to not have a destination? im beginning to think otherwise. good.