To dooooooo List

[crispykatie]

-Become a better friend
-call people back
-be more decisive
-lose 10 pounds
-quit bitching
-read more
-get active
-lose 10 fucking pounds

Comments

LJAnarchy

[odclay]

Nude, arms spread, figuratively crucifying myself in front of the mirror, I can count each rib. One, two, three, et cetera. My skin dangles loosely from the bones. There is too much skin for this skeleton. I can trace the fine angled lines of my jaw, my shoulders. My pelvis. My hips poke out further than my cock. My last erection was twenty-two pounds ago.

My girlfriend thinks there's something wrong with me. Rather, she thought. Back when I had a girlfriend, thirty-four pounds ago.

In the mirror, my skull stares back at me. It would grin, like all skulls do, if only I had the strength to move my heavy lips. I became too weak to smile fifteen pounds ago.

I call it fasting. My girlfriend, before she left me, called it starvation. And other things. She might be right, but she's thirty-four pounds gone.

Ten more pounds is all I need. Ten more pounds and I can start sketching.

Up until thirty-four pounds ago, she called it crazy, sick, disgusting. I disagree. I call it art. Art. All eighty-seven pounds (so far), ten more to go, all of this is art.

There are easier ways to sketch the human body. Easier ways to get anatomy right. The curve of the hip, the angle of the jaw, every line of the arms and legs and neck. There are other ways to draw a skeleton. Bah. Screw the bastards who like the easy way.

I'd rather suffer for my art.