Wait wait wait, I have one. OK. If you HAD to, which would you rather give up...?
"I'll have the es...-um...." She giggles-the giggle of an adult who knows she is charming. "Es-PAD-on? This one. How did you say you pronounced this again?"
He smiles, charmed and gratified to be charmed. "Espadon à la Rouille."
"That's an excellent choice. Would the lady care to start off with anything? Soup or salad?"
"Oh-no, that's OK, thanks."
"No, no no: go ahead. Really. You just talking about wanting a salad. They have this one-right here-with pecans and pears and... Brie?"
"Roquefort."
"Roquefort?" She's heard of its smell.
"I know. You wouldn't think it would be good."
"It's excellent."
"OK.... OK, then, a salad. This one."
"And the gentleman?"
A silence.
"Do you need a minute?"
More silence.
"I'll give you a minute."
"I called about this."
"Excuse me?"
"It's Trelawney? For two at six thirty?"
"I'm very sorry, if you left a message it was not communicated to me. I'll check with the maitre d'."
"No, forget it. Listen. I know this will sound strange, but I need a bowl of protein mush. It's very important that it's completely tasteless."
"I.... All right, I'm sure our chef can accommodate that.... Does-does the gentleman have any special, uh, dietary needs?"
"No. The important part is that it has to be completely and utterly tasteless. I can't enjoy eating it all. It's very important."
"...."
"...."
"...."
"I understand. I'm sure our chef can accommodate that."
"...."
"...."
"...."
"I'll be right back with your salad."
"...."
"So. You know, I hardly know anything about you. What do you do?"
"...."
"...."
"OK, so I know this is none of my business, but why did you just order 'tasteless mush'?"
He sighs.
"Listen.... OK.... OK, you know how sometimes people like to ask you what you'd do if hypothetically you had to choose between food and sex?"
"...."
"Yeah, well, I actually did have to make that choice."
"...."
"It really sucks."
"...."
"...."
"So you...."
"Oh man. I didn't mean it like that. I mean-I know I don't know you all that well yet-but I really like you, and.... I mean, normally I'd never say anything like this, but under the circumstances.... I thought maybe after dinner.... God, this sounds really bad."
"...."
"...."
"Look, I'm just gonna go."
He smiles, charmed and gratified to be charmed. "Espadon à la Rouille."
"That's an excellent choice. Would the lady care to start off with anything? Soup or salad?"
"Oh-no, that's OK, thanks."
"No, no no: go ahead. Really. You just talking about wanting a salad. They have this one-right here-with pecans and pears and... Brie?"
"Roquefort."
"Roquefort?" She's heard of its smell.
"I know. You wouldn't think it would be good."
"It's excellent."
"OK.... OK, then, a salad. This one."
"And the gentleman?"
A silence.
"Do you need a minute?"
More silence.
"I'll give you a minute."
"I called about this."
"Excuse me?"
"It's Trelawney? For two at six thirty?"
"I'm very sorry, if you left a message it was not communicated to me. I'll check with the maitre d'."
"No, forget it. Listen. I know this will sound strange, but I need a bowl of protein mush. It's very important that it's completely tasteless."
"I.... All right, I'm sure our chef can accommodate that.... Does-does the gentleman have any special, uh, dietary needs?"
"No. The important part is that it has to be completely and utterly tasteless. I can't enjoy eating it all. It's very important."
"...."
"...."
"...."
"I understand. I'm sure our chef can accommodate that."
"...."
"...."
"...."
"I'll be right back with your salad."
"...."
"So. You know, I hardly know anything about you. What do you do?"
"...."
"...."
"OK, so I know this is none of my business, but why did you just order 'tasteless mush'?"
He sighs.
"Listen.... OK.... OK, you know how sometimes people like to ask you what you'd do if hypothetically you had to choose between food and sex?"
"...."
"Yeah, well, I actually did have to make that choice."
"...."
"It really sucks."
"...."
"...."
"So you...."
"Oh man. I didn't mean it like that. I mean-I know I don't know you all that well yet-but I really like you, and.... I mean, normally I'd never say anything like this, but under the circumstances.... I thought maybe after dinner.... God, this sounds really bad."
"...."
"...."
"Look, I'm just gonna go."