This is only a tenth of my life so far
Assorted intriguing verbal intercourses today reminding me that if I were a normal person, my life would be half over, at least chronologically speaking. Lucky for me I plan to live to at least 400 (without aging much from here on out, of course).
Be that as it may, a little midlife crisis might be amusing entertainment. I already have my vintage convertible and many strange things in jars. All I lack is some pretty young thing half my age on my arm. I've gone the way of models with their purchased T&A for many years, so perhaps the time is right for a little shaking up; after all, I am an Angelino and an actor and have been called (with differing amounts of admiration, disdain, and definition) "the queerest of the queer."
Therefore, I have decided that for my birthday (next Wednesday), a handsome 20ish boytoy might be just the thing. Chop chop, minions, you've got a week to find me just the right one. Amend that. Ones. Jessicka spoke of Hefner keeling over one day, smothered by breasts. Being smothered by dicks might be interesting, too. Man needs a little variety in his life, you know. Oh hell, why segregate? Bring em all on at once. Snails are hermaphrodites, after all.
Am I the only one disturbed by the fact that the University of California Santa Cruz banana slug mascot is wearing glasses on a part of its body that is not where its eyes are? I hope I am not. Please, UCSC, redraw your fucking logo; it's been driving me apeshit for over 20 years.
Remember that 13% I mentioned? With the standard deviation of 20, give or take? Mhm.
Be that as it may, a little midlife crisis might be amusing entertainment. I already have my vintage convertible and many strange things in jars. All I lack is some pretty young thing half my age on my arm. I've gone the way of models with their purchased T&A for many years, so perhaps the time is right for a little shaking up; after all, I am an Angelino and an actor and have been called (with differing amounts of admiration, disdain, and definition) "the queerest of the queer."
Therefore, I have decided that for my birthday (next Wednesday), a handsome 20ish boytoy might be just the thing. Chop chop, minions, you've got a week to find me just the right one. Amend that. Ones. Jessicka spoke of Hefner keeling over one day, smothered by breasts. Being smothered by dicks might be interesting, too. Man needs a little variety in his life, you know. Oh hell, why segregate? Bring em all on at once. Snails are hermaphrodites, after all.
Am I the only one disturbed by the fact that the University of California Santa Cruz banana slug mascot is wearing glasses on a part of its body that is not where its eyes are? I hope I am not. Please, UCSC, redraw your fucking logo; it's been driving me apeshit for over 20 years.
Remember that 13% I mentioned? With the standard deviation of 20, give or take? Mhm.