Title: God put a smile upon your face
Rating: PG
Pairing: McFassy
Beta:
crazymaexchenWord Count: 3.323
Warnings: mpreg
Disclaimers: Show me a place where I can make this real!
Summary: Written for the
mcFassy Spring Fest prompt #25:
They met and imprinted when they filmed Band of Brothers. They have been a couple for ten years and they have couple of kids. Bonded omegas have a hard time getting jobs and no one wants to hire a bonded omega actor. So James has to stay home and take care of their kids while his alpha is traveling all over the world and doing everything he wished he could do.
A/N: I am sorry dear OP. It ended up rather far away from the prompt, but I already created an universe for it, so I will re-visit it!
If asked to describe his first time meeting Michael, James would with all honesty say “I have no idea.”
It had been a normal day filming, he still had a few scenes to go, but afterwards a whole week off and he was so looking forward to it. He didn't register the door opening, nor the man stepping into the room, but before he could do so anyway, it hit him. With full force.
His body went stiff, mind going blank on the conversation he was having. The blood in his veins suddenly feeling like it was burning him from the inside out.
Unable to bring his body to turn around, he had to wait for what felt like an eternity for the source of the fire and dizziness running through his body to step into his view.
And what did step into his view, set his body even more ablaze than the faint smell that had wafted over to him from the door.
“Hi. I'm Michael.” A light voice, a smile on those gorgeous lips, bright eyes capturing him.
And that was basically it. That very moment James knew he was meant to be with Michael.
That had been ten years ago.
After meeting like this for the first time, it didn't take them long to bond. James had always wanted to stay unattached for as long as possible, with the right sort of suppressants that was possible. Until Michael had walked into the room. Still to this day, James had no idea how his suppressants had failed.
He wasn't unhappy. No. It was quite the opposite. Four lovely children and a fifth on the way would have never happened if Michael hadn't walked into that room. He would have never had such a life. A nice big house, good schools for the children, and a handsome Alpha and husband that fed his family.
But there maybe was the thing that kept on nagging James lately. He 'loved' Michael (love was a word that didn't fit them. It was a 'yours' and 'mine', and only on a few occasions they had told each other of their 'love'). For nothing in the world would he exchange what he had, but on some days he wanted more. And it made him feel guilty.
Ten months after their bonding little Eve was born. Much to the delight of her parents.
Giving his Alpha a healthy baby girl made James proud. She was a symbol of their strong bonding, as well as one for their well matched fertility, and he got drowned in congratulation cards and calls from friends and family.
Two years, five months and 19 days later, Eve became the big sister of Victoria. Michael was not around for the birth, away on a shoot, and only arrived when Victoria was five days old, but as soon as James watched Michael hold her, he felt their bonding strengthen.
They waited until Victoria is a bit older, until Michael suggested having another. And they tried. And kept on trying, but after months James started doubting himself and his qualities as Omega when he didn't end up pregnant.
But when the first days of sickness set in, he excitedly called Michael to book a doctor's appointment. Their twin girls Rose and Sophia were born on the first day of spring, making their parents even more excited to show them off.
They grew up beautifully. All four of his precious girls. But despite loving them all unconditionally, he couldn't help himself feeling guilty for not having a son.
The next time he found out that he was pregnant, he prayed and hope for nothing more than a son.
With a sigh James realized that they were running short on time, yet again.
“Sophia! Rose!” he called as he made his way to the girls' room. Another, more angered sigh when he saw that his girls where still not dressed and playing.
“We have to hurry!” he urged them on while trying to find clothes that suited the weather.
“But papa” little Sophia suddenly pulled on his left leg, favourite toy clutched to her chest.
“No, love. We have to go and get your sisters from school” James tried to stay relaxed, not only for his own sake, but also for the baby that would surely disapprove of the stress.
With panic he watched as his daughter's eyes started to well up. He certainly couldn't deal with that now. Unable to squat down in his current condition, he let little Sophia hug his leg while slowly combing his hand through her hair.
“It's okay darling” he said with the calmest voice possible “we can all play when we get home, okay? But you understand that we have to hurry, yes?”
He felt his daughter nod against his leg and smiled. Turning his head, he saw Rose already fiddling with her dress. Despite being twins, his girls could be so different from time to time, which made them even more special to him.
After being allowed to put on her favourite dress and shoes (although they terribly mismatched), Sophia was her laughing self again and they could finally set of to get the girls' sisters.
It wasn't a long way to the school, but being nearly eight months pregnant didn't help and they made it just in time for the bell to ring. Not having been able to make it in time wouldn't have been the first time, but such times always earned him judging looks from the other parents. An omega that couldn't take proper care of his offspring. It was also putting the Alpha's name to shame.
If only James had been allowed to take the car. But time and time again Michael had insisted that James wouldn't drive a car after his sixth month of pregnancy. And James simply couldn't defy the words of his Alpha.
Finally back home, he still couldn't sit down as the girl's demanded their snacks and help with their homework. All James wanted was Michael to be back home. Shooting had been delayed by another few days, maybe weeks, making it even uncertain if Michael would be around to see his child being born.
Absentminded he stroked his belly, baby kicking, thinking how sad it would be for Michael to miss the birth of his first son. Hopefully his first son. With Michael having been nearly away the whole pregnancy, James didn't know the gender of their unborn child, only the occasional doctor's visit to assure that the child was in good health he could do without Michael, anything else was a taboo for an Omega.
He loved his girls to bits. They could be a handful, so dependent on him, especially the twins, but never would he imagine how life would be without them, enjoying having them around. And Michael loved their girls also. Whenever he was home, any free minute was spent with them. Playing games, going out, or simply reading them a story before putting them to bed with a kiss. Those were James' favourite times.
But they had become so rare over the years. While James had turned into the Omega society had wanted him to be, giving his Alpha children and staying home with them, Michael had pursued his talents of acting. Well enough to support his growing family, but for the price of being away for months on time, leaving James to himself.
Despite loving their children beyond anything, he couldn't help but feel jealous. Which was so wrong. He should be happy to have so many children, to be happy to stay home and take care of them, but he had his moments, when all he wanted was to step out and pursue his own wishes.
Over the last few years, he only had a few jobs, all countable on one hand, and all of them behind the camera. He was thankful that Michael had allowed him to do these jobs, as society saw a bonded Omega not fit to work and most firms obeying society's rules - he had felt so alive doing the jobs.
But the last one had been well before the twin's birth, and since then he hadn't received another offer again.
James was about to check on the girls one last time before going to bed himself, when he heard a small click, signalling the front door being opened. He felt instant happiness at the sound and turned on his heels to make his way downstairs again to greet his Alpha.
“Hey” he whispered as he stood in the door of the hall, watching Michael drop his bags. As soon as they did so, Michael rushed forward and James found himself in a tight embrace.
Lips were pressed against his' only for a brief moment, before being pulled away to stretch in a wide smile.
“Hey yourself” Michael whispered back and James could feel a smile spread on his own face as he felt a hand slowly settling on his belly, on top of their child.
“The little one seems to be asleep.” He tried to sound apologetic, but deep down he was happy for the baby to be asleep after having spent the day kicking up a storm.
Michael didn't answer and only kept on smiling. They stood like that for a while, their eyes locked, before Michael stepped towards the stairs, his hand finding James' to pull him along.
Finally in their room, James instantly made his way to the bed, smirking as Michael followed. Relieve washed through him as his body sank down into the soft bed. After a long day on his feet and his due date approaching, his favourite time of the day was spending time in his bed.
He could feel Michael's gaze on him, but didn't care as he cuddle himself under the blanket. Michael sat with him for a minute, his eyes never leaving James, smile still in place, before getting up and walking into the bathroom.
James could hear him getting ready, but after a while he had trouble keeping his eyes open. He was way past his personal bedtime, not counting in how much the hot day had worn him out. Just before slipping off into sleep, he felt the bed dip behind him and a body pressing against his back.
The girls were beyond excited on waking up to find their daddy already home. Especially the twins kept on sitting on their daddy's knees, babbling with excitement. Eve and Victoria calmed down quicker, more used to their father being away from time to time. James also enjoyed having Michael back home. Not only took it the girls off his back for a bit, it also meant that most likely Michael would be home for the impending birth of their child.
And that fact added to James' stress more than anything. What if they had another daughter? Not the long awaited son? James felt judged by society for not giving his strong Alpha a son. Slowly but surely he started to doubt himself and his qualities as Michael's Omega himself.
Michael would be better off with another Omega.
“Is everything okay?” a slightly worried voice shook him out of his thoughts and upon looking up, James came face to face with the just as worry lined face of his Alpha.
“Yes. Everything is fine” he tried to smile back, but could see that Michael wasn't buying it.
“Let me help you” and before James could argue, two strong arms wrapped around his waist, slowly pulling him away from the stove, where he was preparing lunch for the girls, leaving him free to sit down and give his sore back a break; which he was thankful for.
Scenes like this continued to happen. During breakfast, lunch and supper. At first James thought it nice of Michael to help out so much, but soon James started to feel useless. He had managed pretty fine while Michael was away, why shouldn't he be able to do the same with Michael around?
When Michael yet again tried to pull James away from the kitchen counter, James wouldn't move and continue cutting the vegetables.
“You don't have to do this” Michael whispered against his neck, one hand still on James' waist, the other on his shoulder. When he still wouldn't move, he could feel Michael's body going stiff behind him.
“Why won't you let me help you?”
“I am pretty capable of preparing supper” he answered without looking up. He started to get annoyed on the fact that Michael tried to render him useless whenever he could. “Go and play with the girls if you want to help.”
The hands dropped from his body, but still he refused to look up.
“Go and sit down” Michael's voice was still calm as ever, but James could hear it laced with slowly building anger.
He tried to play it down, not wanting an angered Michael to ruin their evening. “I already started. You can help me with getting out of the way.”
The words were spat before he had a chance to notice, his own anger forcing it's way out. Looking up, he say an expression on Michael's face he hadn't seen in years.
Clenched jaw met with hurt eyes. But instead of feeling guilt, James only felt more anger bubble up to the surface, which also caused the baby to reflect the emotional turmoil with kicks.
They kept looking at each other like this for a moment, before Michael turned with a sneer on his lips, marching out of the kitchen.
It took a bit until James could pick up the vegetable cutting again. He was shaking, the anger and emotions making his eyes well up. Never before had he felt like this. So angry, but lost and helpless at the same time. Maybe it was the hormones acting up so close to the birth, maybe it was the anger he felt towards Michael for not having once offered to take him to the doctor. Like he wasn't interested in the child James was carrying, like he had given up on the chance to ever have a son.
With rubs he tried to calm down the kicking child, but to no avail, as he couldn't calm down himself.
Supper was a delicate situation. The girls could feel the tension, their little faces worried and sad. And only this made feel James guilty. Never did he want to see his children look like that, with him being the cause. They ate mostly in silence, any attempt of James to lighten the mood with a conversation failing.
After taking the girls to bed, and assuring each of them again and again that papa and daddy were fine, and that papa only was tired because of the baby, he went to bed himself. Not bothering waiting up for Michael, he got into bed, hoping that maybe in the morning all would be fine again.
Upon waking up, the first thing he noticed was the empty space where Michael was supposed to be. James had gotten used to waking up alone, but never when Michael was there. And it hurt.
The next thing he noticed was the baby heavily pressing down on his pelvis. With the birth just a few days away, the baby had already dropped, but this morning there was an uncomfortable pressure. Writing it off as something maybe stress induced, he went to take a shower, being sure the warm water would help.
It did help until he stepped out of the shower and noticed a faint bloody trail running down his leg.
His heart stopped. This was not supposed to happen for another three days.
“Michael!” he hollered towards the door as he made his way back to the bed. Just a moment later he heard heavy footsteps coming closer, before the door was thrown open.
As soon as Michael's eyes caught his', James could see the panic in them.
And then it all happened in a blur as the first contraction hit him.
“It's going to be fine. Of course it will be. Not my first time.” James tried to joke as he saw Michael's worried face.
There was silence in the room, only ever so often broken by James' heavy breathing as another contraction hit him. This wasn't his first time certainly, but it was the first time he was early (not counting in the twins). It was nothing to worry about the doctor had assured him, but Michael had refused to leave his side.
“What if it's another girl?” James couldn't keep the question to himself any longer, the tension making it impossible for him to calm down properly. Any distraction was good.
Michael looked at him with a sheer look of confusion. “Then it will be another girl? What are you implying?”
James swallowed hard. “I'll understand if you want to go and look for an Omega that can give you a son.”
“Why would I want that?” Michael's voice was getting more questioning.
“I'm a failure” James confessed with a shaking voice. He was one. Has been one since the twins had been born. Judged by the society for not being fertile enough to bear a son to his Alpha.
A hand settled on his cheek, turning his head to look into honest eyes. “Thank you. Thank you for bonding with me. Thank you for our beautiful girls. Thank you for being there when I get home after months.”
James stifled a sniff before his body tensed up with another contraction. The hand from his cheek moved up to his hair, slowly running through his hair.
“So you won't leave us, even if this baby will be another girl?” he whispered as his body relaxed.
“Of course not” Michael answered, his hand still running through James' hair. “Why would you even think that?”
Feeling suddenly embarrassed, James closed his eyes and turned his head away from Michael.
“I don't know. You didn't offer to make a doctor's appointment when you were home. I thought you had given up on having a son.”
Lips were pressed against his temple. “I didn't offer, because I don't care if it's a boy or a girl. All I want are healthy children. And you gave me four healthy girls. You can give me another four. I'll love each and every one of them. I thought you felt the same.”
“I do, but”
“Then now please stop being ridiculous” Michael laughed and James suddenly felt like a stone dropping off his chest.
As another contraction approach, he felt a strong hand wrap around one of his own. Giving him something to hold on to.
“We never discussed baby names for the little one.” Michael noted, holding the bundle closer to his chest.
“My first choice was Susan” James smiled tiredly, watching from the bed, propped up as good as possible with pillows.
“Not much of an unisex name. And I doubt he'd approve.” Michael laughed, startling the baby. Instinctively James opened his arms, waiting for Michael to step closer and settle the baby in it's other father's arms.
A dip on the bed, and together they looked down at the newest addition to their family.
“Daniel.” Michael suddenly said, making James look at him.
“Daniel Fassbender.” James completed, reaching to touch the tiny hand of their son.
“Sounds perfect. Just like he is.”
“Yes.” And he felt a hot tear running down his cheek. Amazement and an overwhelming feeling of belonging and contentment suddenly rushing through him.
“Love you.” and the tear was kissed away, leaving only the smile on his face.
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Notes: So much love to
crazymaexchen for putting up with my whining and angsting and brainstorming! And all the help! <3
Lame title is lame. Sorry.