Comments | cris: growing old vs. growing up

cris

growing old vs. growing up

Sep 05, 2003 22:26

I was out at this restaurant last night, having dessert and drinks with a couple of friends, celebrating someone else's thirtieth birthday, and the conversation had turned to that topic that comes up eventually amongst folks who can see the end of their twenties with the inevitability of a sunset. Oh, only 29? You're young still. It's all ( Read more... )

midlife

Comments 5

vicissitude September 5 2003, 23:40:14 UTC

so, you're younger than me, eh?

to me getting older has just been more learning and play and exploration. i really think that growing is exactly what you make of it. sure it takes a bit more work these days, but at 29 i make more money than I ever have, have more freedom with my time than i did in college, and am excellent physical condition, too.

most importantly however, i have all of the fun with a fraction of the angst. and life is changing. i may eventually have a long-term partner and have a child. and that will make life different, too. but it is all good. it is all just growth and change.

i think you feel similarly as it seems to me many of our friends do. i feel very fortunate to have such very alive people around me regardless of their age.

cris September 8 2003, 19:58:50 UTC

so, you're younger than me, eh?
I think so, but not by much. I still tend to think of you along with Jen. K, Hilary and Liza as the "class of '96" and that we all met around the time we graduated from university and are approximately similar in age.
to me getting older has just been more learning and play and exploration. i really think that growing is exactly what you make of it. sure it takes a bit more work these days, but at 29 i make more money than I ever have, have more freedom with my time than i did in college, and am excellent physical condition, too.

It feels like the difference between university and grad school. One's about exploring, trying options and spreading yourself out, while the other is about focus and building depth. Two different strategies for growth that complement each other, but shouldn't be pursued in isolation.

I was saying to someone else that turning 30 wouldn't mean being forced to give up things I wanted to do at 20, but it meant being old enough to know better.
I feel very fortunate to have ( ... )

wantedonvoyage September 6 2003, 08:58:56 UTC

I agree, and I'll be 34 next week. I'm in the best shape of my life, almost debt-free, and able to surround myself with caring, intelligent people. When I was 19 I confused and miserable, not something I'd want to go back to.

msjen September 6 2003, 16:31:37 UTC

A good friend of mine gave me a long speech recently about how she is *excited* to turn 30 (my initial reaction, Are you high?), because, to sum up, she had gotten through most of the dear-lord-who-am-I-and-what-am-I-doing-with-my-life crisis during her twenties. In other words, she now knows who she is and is ready to start being that person without any of her own bullshit getting in the way. Same thing.

And, reading your last sentence there, I think you're both right. So yay for 29.

We should discuss this over dinner while you're here! Let me know when you're free.

cris September 8 2003, 17:27:23 UTC

most of this week is pretty good for dinner. I'm on vacation, and I don't have juggle teaching 2nd graders and going to grad school. I'm over in Alameda County, so do you think that meeting up somewhere in the East Bay would be easy? or would it be better to meet up in the city?