--'cause there's never a right time to say goodbye --
Title: Great While It Lasted
Author/Artist: crimsondream13
Fandom: Axis Powers Hetalia
Character(s) or Pairing(s): US/UK
Rating: PG
Warnings: Slight cursing, angst
Summary: There were only two endings to a story: a happy ending, or a bad ending. Fate was just cruel enough to give them the latter.
“I’m tired.”
Alfred blinked in confusion at that, slowly reaching for the remote control on his lap to turn off the television and DVD player where they were watching House, M.D. on. “Uh,” he scratched his cheek before checking the time, sighing when he noticed that it was just 8 pm, “Well, okay. I’ll go prepare the bed-”
“No.” Arthur shook his head, emerald eyes looking suspiciously dull, “I’m just- I can’t do this anymore, Alfred. I’m sorry.”
“What do you mean?” Alfred asked in nervousness, shifting his feet onto the floor as he stood up. “Why are you even apologizing? Look,” he chuckled while wringing his hands together, “if this is about your scones, just forget it, okay? I’m really okay with them.”
Arthur laughed bitterly. “Alfred...”
They had been together for centuries now, after Arthur confessed to Alfred that he loved him as more than a brother. Alfred had been confused and scared, the anxiety adding to his problems as he tried to think of how to reject Arthur in a gentle way. He hadn’t been ready, hadn’t been prepared to be in a committed relationship yet.
But Arthur said that it was fine.
“I can wait, Alfred. It’s okay.” Arthur smiled gently.
He just nodded in agreement, not knowing what else to say to comfort the elder man. How could he, when he didn’t even know how he felt about Arthur? Was it platonic? Was it brotherly? Was it more than he’d thought it had been?
Arthur waited patiently all those years, not caring that Alfred was taking so long in his decision making. After all, he’d loved Alfred for centuries before without saying anything, what was wrong with waiting some more years?
It had taken him approximately two (or was it four?) years to finally figure it all out, and it was worth it.
Alfred blushed. “Er, Arthur? About- about your, uh...”
“My love confession to you?” Arthur suggested with a quirked eyebrow, though his smile betrayed his inner amusement. “What about it?”
Alfred coughed, clearing his throat for a bit before murmuring softly, “I just...I’ve realized that I...”
“I love you too.”
Arthur had been so happy at that, the tears flowing freely before he could even stop it as he clung onto his now-lover’s shirt. They’d cried, laughed and smiled at everything, feeling happy and a bit stupid that they’d waited so long to get together. But that didn’t matter, because they were together. They finally had each other with no restrictions, with no reason to hide how much they actually felt about each other.
They had been so happy then.
“I’m sorry,” Arthur murmured softly, “but I- we can’t keep fooling ourselves like this. It’s...it’s just not working out, Alfred.”
“Do you even know what you’re saying?” Alfred whispered back, running a hand through his hair in anxiety when he noticed Arthur’s staring at the floor. “Arthur?”
Arthur nodded in response, letting the air still for a moment as he glanced up at Alfred. “We can’t keep doing this. Even you know what I mean, don’t you? This-” he waved a hand at the space separating them “-this can’t go on.”
“But we’re happy, aren’t we? What’s so wrong with that?” Alfred pleaded as he moved a hand forward to touch Arthur, stopping when he noticed the dark look the other man gave him. “Why...why are you doing this?”
Arthur gave him a crooked smile. “You really believe that we’re happy? Honestly?” He shook his head with a chuckle, rubbing at the crease on his forehead while shooting an amused yet tired look at Alfred. “We’re not, Alfred. It’s been obvious for a long time.”
“Why do you keep saying that!” Alfred spat with anger, only letting his self relax after a deep breath of air. “Just...don’t you love me? Weren’t you the one who confessed in the first place? What did I do wrong?”
“You did nothing wrong.” Arthur spoke softly, almost like he was afraid to say any more. “I just- I’m sorry, Alfred. I can’t...it’s not you, okay?” He shook his head with a breathy sigh. “It’s me. It’s just so hard to explain...”
“Then don’t.” Alfred frowned with his arms crossed. “Just tell me the reason why you don’t want this- us, anymore. In simple words, so that I can understand.” He laughed harshly.
“I...” Arthur hesitated, turning his gaze down onto his feet again before continuing in a softer voice, “I don’t love you like I used to anymore.”
Alfred froze. “You...” He shook his head, chewing on his lip for a moment before struggling to say, “Why? Is it my fault? Was I too clingy?” He sounded desperate, he knew, but he couldn’t care less when Arthur just confessed to him that he didn’t love him anymore. “Tell me what I did wrong, Arthur.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong, Alfred.” Arthur murmured in a pleading tone, eyes glassy with tears as he spoke in a shaky voice, “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have said anything before; I just knew- I knew it was too good to last.” He stifled a sob as a tear ran down his cheek. “I thought- I honestly thought that I’d love you forever. I was...I was wrong.”
Alfred remained silent as Arthur grappled for the right words, the former already close to crying as well with how his lover looked at that moment. Arthur looked so broken- eyes teary, skin pale and hands trembling...he couldn’t handle not being able to touch him at that moment.
It was just so unfair.
“It just faded,” Arthur whispered, as if he was reminding his self of how it had happened, “I don’t- I don’t know why. I loved you so much, but...” He shook his head while biting his lower lip, not caring for the tears trailing down his cheeks as he continued, “When I looked at you at that one moment, I just didn’t feel-” he choked down a sob again “-it just didn’t feel the same. I felt so much guilt, so much fear that I was just using you and I couldn’t handle it, Alfred! I was so confused, I didn’t-” He bit the inside of his cheek to keep from sobbing, using the sleeves of his shirt to wipe away the tear tracks on his face. “I’m sorry.”
I’m sorry.
Alfred choked out a laugh at that, not even noticing the tears brimming in his eyes. It hurt so much -so, so much-, like his heart had just been ripped out of his chest and stomped on in front of him, just to make him feel even worse. It wasn’t as flashy as soap operas made them to be; the world didn’t crumble around him, he didn’t have the want to commit suicide right then and there, he didn’t hear his heart breaking-
It just hurt. So fucking much.
“I...see.” Alfred mumbled softly, wiping away the tears that threatened to fall from his eyes as he gave Arthur a lopsided smile. “It’s over, then...”
Arthur nodded almost invisibly, gaze still lowered onto the floor as he murmured, “I’ll leave now.”
“Wait.” Alfred held out a hand to stop Arthur from walking away, eyes glistening as he pleaded, “Just...just one kiss, Arthur. Before you leave.” Before you leave me, his mind whispered to him and he bit his lip, shoving that little voice in the back of his mind as he stared directly into Arthur’s emerald eyes. Say yes, Arthur. Please.
Arthur opened his mouth to speak before shutting it again, his trembling lower lip changing into a sad smile as he shook his head. “I can’t.”
It’s really over now, Alfred.
Alfred nodded hesitantly at that, giving Arthur one of his own sad smiles as he spoke, “It was great while it lasted.”
Arthur smiled back at him; eyes dim with mixed emotions as he nodded his agreement. “It was.”
Heartbreak had come easier than he’d thought it would.
============================
A/N: Oh yeaaaaah. This is what happens when I put my playlist on shuffle and Say Goodbye comes up. =___=a I’ve been so hung over this fic, seriously. I couldn’t find the right pairing, and I had to ask my bff [not like I don’t do that already] over and over for what she thought was the right pairing. Bff, since you kept insisting that I hurt Cherry in a fic, I decided to just choose USUK. :l
Hope you guys enjoyed [oh the irony] the fic! <3
Author/Artist: crimsondream13
Fandom: Axis Powers Hetalia
Character(s) or Pairing(s): US/UK
Rating: PG
Warnings: Slight cursing, angst
Summary: There were only two endings to a story: a happy ending, or a bad ending. Fate was just cruel enough to give them the latter.
“I’m tired.”
Alfred blinked in confusion at that, slowly reaching for the remote control on his lap to turn off the television and DVD player where they were watching House, M.D. on. “Uh,” he scratched his cheek before checking the time, sighing when he noticed that it was just 8 pm, “Well, okay. I’ll go prepare the bed-”
“No.” Arthur shook his head, emerald eyes looking suspiciously dull, “I’m just- I can’t do this anymore, Alfred. I’m sorry.”
“What do you mean?” Alfred asked in nervousness, shifting his feet onto the floor as he stood up. “Why are you even apologizing? Look,” he chuckled while wringing his hands together, “if this is about your scones, just forget it, okay? I’m really okay with them.”
Arthur laughed bitterly. “Alfred...”
They had been together for centuries now, after Arthur confessed to Alfred that he loved him as more than a brother. Alfred had been confused and scared, the anxiety adding to his problems as he tried to think of how to reject Arthur in a gentle way. He hadn’t been ready, hadn’t been prepared to be in a committed relationship yet.
But Arthur said that it was fine.
“I can wait, Alfred. It’s okay.” Arthur smiled gently.
He just nodded in agreement, not knowing what else to say to comfort the elder man. How could he, when he didn’t even know how he felt about Arthur? Was it platonic? Was it brotherly? Was it more than he’d thought it had been?
Arthur waited patiently all those years, not caring that Alfred was taking so long in his decision making. After all, he’d loved Alfred for centuries before without saying anything, what was wrong with waiting some more years?
It had taken him approximately two (or was it four?) years to finally figure it all out, and it was worth it.
Alfred blushed. “Er, Arthur? About- about your, uh...”
“My love confession to you?” Arthur suggested with a quirked eyebrow, though his smile betrayed his inner amusement. “What about it?”
Alfred coughed, clearing his throat for a bit before murmuring softly, “I just...I’ve realized that I...”
“I love you too.”
Arthur had been so happy at that, the tears flowing freely before he could even stop it as he clung onto his now-lover’s shirt. They’d cried, laughed and smiled at everything, feeling happy and a bit stupid that they’d waited so long to get together. But that didn’t matter, because they were together. They finally had each other with no restrictions, with no reason to hide how much they actually felt about each other.
They had been so happy then.
“I’m sorry,” Arthur murmured softly, “but I- we can’t keep fooling ourselves like this. It’s...it’s just not working out, Alfred.”
“Do you even know what you’re saying?” Alfred whispered back, running a hand through his hair in anxiety when he noticed Arthur’s staring at the floor. “Arthur?”
Arthur nodded in response, letting the air still for a moment as he glanced up at Alfred. “We can’t keep doing this. Even you know what I mean, don’t you? This-” he waved a hand at the space separating them “-this can’t go on.”
“But we’re happy, aren’t we? What’s so wrong with that?” Alfred pleaded as he moved a hand forward to touch Arthur, stopping when he noticed the dark look the other man gave him. “Why...why are you doing this?”
Arthur gave him a crooked smile. “You really believe that we’re happy? Honestly?” He shook his head with a chuckle, rubbing at the crease on his forehead while shooting an amused yet tired look at Alfred. “We’re not, Alfred. It’s been obvious for a long time.”
“Why do you keep saying that!” Alfred spat with anger, only letting his self relax after a deep breath of air. “Just...don’t you love me? Weren’t you the one who confessed in the first place? What did I do wrong?”
“You did nothing wrong.” Arthur spoke softly, almost like he was afraid to say any more. “I just- I’m sorry, Alfred. I can’t...it’s not you, okay?” He shook his head with a breathy sigh. “It’s me. It’s just so hard to explain...”
“Then don’t.” Alfred frowned with his arms crossed. “Just tell me the reason why you don’t want this- us, anymore. In simple words, so that I can understand.” He laughed harshly.
“I...” Arthur hesitated, turning his gaze down onto his feet again before continuing in a softer voice, “I don’t love you like I used to anymore.”
Alfred froze. “You...” He shook his head, chewing on his lip for a moment before struggling to say, “Why? Is it my fault? Was I too clingy?” He sounded desperate, he knew, but he couldn’t care less when Arthur just confessed to him that he didn’t love him anymore. “Tell me what I did wrong, Arthur.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong, Alfred.” Arthur murmured in a pleading tone, eyes glassy with tears as he spoke in a shaky voice, “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have said anything before; I just knew- I knew it was too good to last.” He stifled a sob as a tear ran down his cheek. “I thought- I honestly thought that I’d love you forever. I was...I was wrong.”
Alfred remained silent as Arthur grappled for the right words, the former already close to crying as well with how his lover looked at that moment. Arthur looked so broken- eyes teary, skin pale and hands trembling...he couldn’t handle not being able to touch him at that moment.
It was just so unfair.
“It just faded,” Arthur whispered, as if he was reminding his self of how it had happened, “I don’t- I don’t know why. I loved you so much, but...” He shook his head while biting his lower lip, not caring for the tears trailing down his cheeks as he continued, “When I looked at you at that one moment, I just didn’t feel-” he choked down a sob again “-it just didn’t feel the same. I felt so much guilt, so much fear that I was just using you and I couldn’t handle it, Alfred! I was so confused, I didn’t-” He bit the inside of his cheek to keep from sobbing, using the sleeves of his shirt to wipe away the tear tracks on his face. “I’m sorry.”
I’m sorry.
Alfred choked out a laugh at that, not even noticing the tears brimming in his eyes. It hurt so much -so, so much-, like his heart had just been ripped out of his chest and stomped on in front of him, just to make him feel even worse. It wasn’t as flashy as soap operas made them to be; the world didn’t crumble around him, he didn’t have the want to commit suicide right then and there, he didn’t hear his heart breaking-
It just hurt. So fucking much.
“I...see.” Alfred mumbled softly, wiping away the tears that threatened to fall from his eyes as he gave Arthur a lopsided smile. “It’s over, then...”
Arthur nodded almost invisibly, gaze still lowered onto the floor as he murmured, “I’ll leave now.”
“Wait.” Alfred held out a hand to stop Arthur from walking away, eyes glistening as he pleaded, “Just...just one kiss, Arthur. Before you leave.” Before you leave me, his mind whispered to him and he bit his lip, shoving that little voice in the back of his mind as he stared directly into Arthur’s emerald eyes. Say yes, Arthur. Please.
Arthur opened his mouth to speak before shutting it again, his trembling lower lip changing into a sad smile as he shook his head. “I can’t.”
It’s really over now, Alfred.
Alfred nodded hesitantly at that, giving Arthur one of his own sad smiles as he spoke, “It was great while it lasted.”
Arthur smiled back at him; eyes dim with mixed emotions as he nodded his agreement. “It was.”
Heartbreak had come easier than he’d thought it would.
============================
A/N: Oh yeaaaaah. This is what happens when I put my playlist on shuffle and Say Goodbye comes up. =___=a I’ve been so hung over this fic, seriously. I couldn’t find the right pairing, and I had to ask my bff [not like I don’t do that already] over and over for what she thought was the right pairing. Bff, since you kept insisting that I hurt Cherry in a fic, I decided to just choose USUK. :l
Hope you guys enjoyed [oh the irony] the fic! <3