Why Do I Smile Still?
I've been beaten many times by my peers in Elementary School, shunned by most for most of my existance. I once loved but because of the rage that broke out on occasion I made myself vanish from her life. I've had close friends die and some family as well. I learned that I should not have been, and yet I am.
Why then do I still smile? Why do I smile knowing that I'm alone. Why do I smile feeling that I am unaccepted? Why do I smile even when the world has done so little to comfort me.
Is it just who I am? Have I used my face to lie to all the world? Or is it the defiance born from who I once was? Why do I not think to draw the blood myself or from others when there have been people driven to such points by lesser pains? Why do I suffer so much, why am I made to cry, why am I made to hate, why am I kept from true comfort and joy? Why does it seem everyone around me has true happiness backing their smile while loneliness backs mine?
For what purpose is my pain supposed to serve?
Why then do I still smile? Why do I smile knowing that I'm alone. Why do I smile feeling that I am unaccepted? Why do I smile even when the world has done so little to comfort me.
Is it just who I am? Have I used my face to lie to all the world? Or is it the defiance born from who I once was? Why do I not think to draw the blood myself or from others when there have been people driven to such points by lesser pains? Why do I suffer so much, why am I made to cry, why am I made to hate, why am I kept from true comfort and joy? Why does it seem everyone around me has true happiness backing their smile while loneliness backs mine?
For what purpose is my pain supposed to serve?