Oh, the lazy LJ bitch I am...
Hey everyone! Yes, I know, I suck ass and don't update my journal nearly as often as I should. My girlfriend does all the frantic updating ^_~ I feel a lot that it is practically pointless to even bother writing anything since Rebecca pretty much is always giving everyone the lowdown, anyway.
Before I do any con reports or hangout descriptions, I should tell everyone, I am taking a medical leave of absences from school. Basically, I wore myself out so severely between cons and driving and hangouts and not taking any breaks or weekends to myself that I have literally zero motivation to do anything but sleep, since I haven't had a moment to myself since practically the summer. It's not that I don't love hanging out with everyone and picking people up who need it, or making extravagant weekend plans, but honestly, I don't get nearly enough sleep, or any time to myself where I can relaz my mind and body, and it's completely drained me of everything. This is on top of my already documented medical problems with my colon, which causes severe fatigue in and of itself. I usually like to be active, and if I *don't* anna do anything, there is usually a problem. Anyone who knows me knows I LOVE University of the Arts and I LOVE my major more than anything. but attendance is strict here, and this semester I'm taking three less classes than I usually do, which is still seven. I feel like I'm dying when I have to wake up at 9:30 and that is totally not like me. I'm irritable, unmotivated and completely sluggish, plus I've never felt less healthy. And it's bad, because I WANT to be here. All I want to do is compose, and sometimes I'm even too tired to go to the lab with Ty to work on our music, which is completely ridiculous, since it's one of my favorite things to do. I've been talking to my advisor, my major teacher and my counselor and they all agree that this would be wise. I can still take major lessons so I don't fall behind in my actual major. I won't lose my scholarship, which I would have if I got below a 3.0 GPA, and I can FINALLY take some time to sleep, maybe get a job, take some martial arts, and get my body and mind feeling healthy and wholesome again, instead of strained and exhausted.
I feel like I've been playing Mother Theresa way too often lately. I'm completely obsessed with helping people, and since I love you guys so much, I am always trying to find some ridiculous manner in which I could assist my friends in need, whether it's giving them a ride or picking them up or paying for food or coming to visit. I already get shit from my parents because of my credit card bills, with gas and food and shit, and sometimes I even opt to miss class so I can be somewhere to pick someone up, or go to a con, or something, and that s one of the reasons I have to take the rest of the semester off. Do me a favor, guys. If I offer to do something ridiculous in order to help you and it's completely out of my way, tell me so and don't let me do it!!! lol it's really harming me! I absolutely don't want anyone to feel badly if I've helped you in the past, but it's getting to the point where I haven't taken a moment to myself because I'm constantly trying to do stuff for people, and it's taking a serious toll on my school work and I'm starting to hate myself for it. I know you guys love me and appreciate me, but don't let me do ridiculous things when there are other ways to get around it. I'm still taking Rob and Steph to Tekko, and I'll be hanging around the con a little bit, but I made plans with one of my friends from Carnegie Melon and I'll be spending Friday or Saturday with him. He's a MI friend whom I haven't seen in three years. I apologize...you guys won't have access to my car for a day or two. Just enjoy the con ^^; I really wish Beck was going. I by no means am trying to guilt anyone! I just wanted everyone to know how tired I am and I'm doing badly in school because of it. Sometimes I don't know what's good for me.
Anyway, I had a lot of fun this weekend, except for Rebecca getting sick O_O I love you puppy! I've been trying to take good care of her. I hope she feels better soon! I think I'll return sometime today to give con updates and more lengthy banter XD
I love you guys, I really do. I hope no one takes offense to this. I'm just so tired...
I'll be back soon to update. I am quite relieved about taking the rest of the semester off. I think that will be endlessly good for me. Let's hope so...
Before I do any con reports or hangout descriptions, I should tell everyone, I am taking a medical leave of absences from school. Basically, I wore myself out so severely between cons and driving and hangouts and not taking any breaks or weekends to myself that I have literally zero motivation to do anything but sleep, since I haven't had a moment to myself since practically the summer. It's not that I don't love hanging out with everyone and picking people up who need it, or making extravagant weekend plans, but honestly, I don't get nearly enough sleep, or any time to myself where I can relaz my mind and body, and it's completely drained me of everything. This is on top of my already documented medical problems with my colon, which causes severe fatigue in and of itself. I usually like to be active, and if I *don't* anna do anything, there is usually a problem. Anyone who knows me knows I LOVE University of the Arts and I LOVE my major more than anything. but attendance is strict here, and this semester I'm taking three less classes than I usually do, which is still seven. I feel like I'm dying when I have to wake up at 9:30 and that is totally not like me. I'm irritable, unmotivated and completely sluggish, plus I've never felt less healthy. And it's bad, because I WANT to be here. All I want to do is compose, and sometimes I'm even too tired to go to the lab with Ty to work on our music, which is completely ridiculous, since it's one of my favorite things to do. I've been talking to my advisor, my major teacher and my counselor and they all agree that this would be wise. I can still take major lessons so I don't fall behind in my actual major. I won't lose my scholarship, which I would have if I got below a 3.0 GPA, and I can FINALLY take some time to sleep, maybe get a job, take some martial arts, and get my body and mind feeling healthy and wholesome again, instead of strained and exhausted.
I feel like I've been playing Mother Theresa way too often lately. I'm completely obsessed with helping people, and since I love you guys so much, I am always trying to find some ridiculous manner in which I could assist my friends in need, whether it's giving them a ride or picking them up or paying for food or coming to visit. I already get shit from my parents because of my credit card bills, with gas and food and shit, and sometimes I even opt to miss class so I can be somewhere to pick someone up, or go to a con, or something, and that s one of the reasons I have to take the rest of the semester off. Do me a favor, guys. If I offer to do something ridiculous in order to help you and it's completely out of my way, tell me so and don't let me do it!!! lol it's really harming me! I absolutely don't want anyone to feel badly if I've helped you in the past, but it's getting to the point where I haven't taken a moment to myself because I'm constantly trying to do stuff for people, and it's taking a serious toll on my school work and I'm starting to hate myself for it. I know you guys love me and appreciate me, but don't let me do ridiculous things when there are other ways to get around it. I'm still taking Rob and Steph to Tekko, and I'll be hanging around the con a little bit, but I made plans with one of my friends from Carnegie Melon and I'll be spending Friday or Saturday with him. He's a MI friend whom I haven't seen in three years. I apologize...you guys won't have access to my car for a day or two. Just enjoy the con ^^; I really wish Beck was going. I by no means am trying to guilt anyone! I just wanted everyone to know how tired I am and I'm doing badly in school because of it. Sometimes I don't know what's good for me.
Anyway, I had a lot of fun this weekend, except for Rebecca getting sick O_O I love you puppy! I've been trying to take good care of her. I hope she feels better soon! I think I'll return sometime today to give con updates and more lengthy banter XD
I love you guys, I really do. I hope no one takes offense to this. I'm just so tired...
I'll be back soon to update. I am quite relieved about taking the rest of the semester off. I think that will be endlessly good for me. Let's hope so...