Abuse is Hell
All over the country every single day there are men and women alike who are living in a personal hell. This hell they live in is one they either don't know how to get out of or it is one they do know how to get out of but choose not to.
That hell? The life of being abused by a spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, or family member that they live with.
I simply don't understand how man can do harm to one another. On another level I get it totally. There are people like myself who were sexually abused as children who grow up only knowing that they are to do whatever they are told in regards to having sex. They get involved in prostitution and a lot of other things that take them down a road of destruction that seems like will never end. So often we see people on the streets who ended up there because they lost all they had because no one helped them to see that there was a different road they could take.
There are also children who are beaten as kids. I have seen a lot of these kind of kids grow up to choose people to be with that are also abusers. They endure beating after beating and do nothing to get them out of the situation. The cops might even be called more times then one can count but because they quote love the person they are with unquote they insist all is ok and the person in question just gets let go with a warning and that is it. Here again, there are people who end up on the streets because they have no where else to go or just felt it was their only way out. And of course there are those who end up dead because they cried wolf too many times. Those are the ones who never had a chance no matter what.
How can we change this life of being abused? There are services but are they really helpful? Sure there are very excellent places such as shelters for men and women alike who come in saying they really need help. But so often these good shelters have a limited amount of money to help all the people that come in their doors. There are also places that offer counseling but they do not often provide their services for free. People are expected to pay up front or have some sort of insurance. Today's insurance plans often do not allow for a person to get help from councilors or if they do then the person is deemed crazy or something else that makes it impossible for a person to get better insurance. Not even a good insurance plan is guarantied to get a person the help they need. So round and round the vicious cycle of abuse continues in so many cases.
Family and friends can be an option but it is also draining on those people who do care. This ends up meaning that the very people who help out also need help to be there in a good way for the person in need. So often the one that is abused maybe lets the person help a little but then takes off to other places so as to not Burdon the friend or family member who is so desperately trying to help out the one being abused. It is frustrating because everyone involved is trying to help but in actuality they are spinning in circles with no results.
There are people like myself who came to have a relationship with Jesus Christ but that is not a way of ending the abuse. You still need to take action to stop the abuse and get the help for yourself in the process. This means leaving the abuser, finding the right sort of help, and most of all, finding confidence in you. I spent years not doing anything with my dad’s side of the family just so I would not be in contact with my uncle. It was my way of dealing and it in so many ways helped me to reach out and get the help I did need. I did not go to counseling at all of all things. But I did have people I could talk to who helped me come up with good ways to deal with my feelings in appropriate ways.
At age forty-one I have finally drug myself out of a hell I have lived in for all the years I have been alive. It started at the age of eleven when I told my uncle that the abuse was stopping, no discussion about it. I then tortured myself for too many years thinking I was worthless and that I had to submit to whatever was demanded upon me. I thank the Lord every day that the man I met was a good kind man who loves me for who I am. He may not be a Christian as I am but that will not keep me from loving him any less. And I realize that believing in God as I do is not what everyone else is going to believe.
I stand here as an example of just one person who got out. I have lots to work on when it comes to my confidence and just life in general. So when I see someone being abused such as the lady who lives upstairs from my best friend I want to help. But unless she wants to get help I can't do a thing.
We all live in our own little bubble of life. Sometimes it takes us getting out of our bubbles and being willing to risk asking if a person needs help. If we all did this we might be surprised at how many people we might just help get on the road to a better life. Think about it the next time you hear or see someone crying out for help.
That hell? The life of being abused by a spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, or family member that they live with.
I simply don't understand how man can do harm to one another. On another level I get it totally. There are people like myself who were sexually abused as children who grow up only knowing that they are to do whatever they are told in regards to having sex. They get involved in prostitution and a lot of other things that take them down a road of destruction that seems like will never end. So often we see people on the streets who ended up there because they lost all they had because no one helped them to see that there was a different road they could take.
There are also children who are beaten as kids. I have seen a lot of these kind of kids grow up to choose people to be with that are also abusers. They endure beating after beating and do nothing to get them out of the situation. The cops might even be called more times then one can count but because they quote love the person they are with unquote they insist all is ok and the person in question just gets let go with a warning and that is it. Here again, there are people who end up on the streets because they have no where else to go or just felt it was their only way out. And of course there are those who end up dead because they cried wolf too many times. Those are the ones who never had a chance no matter what.
How can we change this life of being abused? There are services but are they really helpful? Sure there are very excellent places such as shelters for men and women alike who come in saying they really need help. But so often these good shelters have a limited amount of money to help all the people that come in their doors. There are also places that offer counseling but they do not often provide their services for free. People are expected to pay up front or have some sort of insurance. Today's insurance plans often do not allow for a person to get help from councilors or if they do then the person is deemed crazy or something else that makes it impossible for a person to get better insurance. Not even a good insurance plan is guarantied to get a person the help they need. So round and round the vicious cycle of abuse continues in so many cases.
Family and friends can be an option but it is also draining on those people who do care. This ends up meaning that the very people who help out also need help to be there in a good way for the person in need. So often the one that is abused maybe lets the person help a little but then takes off to other places so as to not Burdon the friend or family member who is so desperately trying to help out the one being abused. It is frustrating because everyone involved is trying to help but in actuality they are spinning in circles with no results.
There are people like myself who came to have a relationship with Jesus Christ but that is not a way of ending the abuse. You still need to take action to stop the abuse and get the help for yourself in the process. This means leaving the abuser, finding the right sort of help, and most of all, finding confidence in you. I spent years not doing anything with my dad’s side of the family just so I would not be in contact with my uncle. It was my way of dealing and it in so many ways helped me to reach out and get the help I did need. I did not go to counseling at all of all things. But I did have people I could talk to who helped me come up with good ways to deal with my feelings in appropriate ways.
At age forty-one I have finally drug myself out of a hell I have lived in for all the years I have been alive. It started at the age of eleven when I told my uncle that the abuse was stopping, no discussion about it. I then tortured myself for too many years thinking I was worthless and that I had to submit to whatever was demanded upon me. I thank the Lord every day that the man I met was a good kind man who loves me for who I am. He may not be a Christian as I am but that will not keep me from loving him any less. And I realize that believing in God as I do is not what everyone else is going to believe.
I stand here as an example of just one person who got out. I have lots to work on when it comes to my confidence and just life in general. So when I see someone being abused such as the lady who lives upstairs from my best friend I want to help. But unless she wants to get help I can't do a thing.
We all live in our own little bubble of life. Sometimes it takes us getting out of our bubbles and being willing to risk asking if a person needs help. If we all did this we might be surprised at how many people we might just help get on the road to a better life. Think about it the next time you hear or see someone crying out for help.