Fic: Scarlet Pleasures [2/10]
Title: Scarlet Pleasures
Author: Jo. R (driftingatdusk)
Rating: FR-15 overall, one FR-18 scene that will be labelled later on.
Category: Drama, Case-file, Romance (Gibbs/Abby), Abby/Tony Friendship, Ziva/Abby Friendship
Pairing: Gibbs/Abby
Spoilers: 'Forced Entry', 'Guilty Pleasure', up to and including the season seven finale.
Summary: Holly Snow makes a request for help that puts Gibbs and Abby at odds.
****
Part Two
****
Even the steady pounding of the bass on one of her favourite songs didn't seem to help steady her nerves. Abby tapped her foot in time with the beat, her hands braced against her work counter as she waited for her babies to produce some results from the tests she was running.
There wasn't a crime scene to speak of; Holly Snow's contact had disappeared and the SecNav's nephew had been found in an alleyway away from where the attack had taken place, an alley where any evidence that might have been lingering had been washed away by the rain that had fallen that night. The would-be brothel had denied all knowledge of the assault and had politely refused them entry to the building when their lawyers had produced written papers that denied the Metro cops who'd initially pulled the case from entering the premises.
All she had to work on were the clothes Lieutenant Davenport had been wearing and the hope that she'd find something - some tiny trace of DNA everyone else had missed that the rain hadn't destroyed. She wasn't holding her breath, though. She knew she could hope and pray and regret her decision to take the undercover assignment with all of her mite but nothing would chance. It wouldn't magically provide closure to the case and mean she could gracefully back out without feeling like a failure or a fool or both.
She was already questioning herself and her motives for agreeing to it. She could say she'd felt intimidated by the presence of so many of what she considered to be important people. She could say she'd felt moved by Holly's plea to find her former colleague or that she'd sympathised with the plight of SecNav's nephew and had just wanted to help because she was a good person but even that, while partly true, wasn't the full story.
Though the thought of what she might have to do terrified her on one level, the reaction of the man who'd been standing behind her had cemented her decision. Feeling the warmth of his hand, the strength of calloused fingers gripping her shoulder, the softness of the fingertips that had grazed the bare skin of her neck...
Abby squared her shoulders against the shiver that ran up her spine, her hands clenching on the work surface in front of her momentarily. She knew it was hopeless - told herself it was every other minute - but she couldn't stop the thrill that went through her every time she remembered his touch and imagined how it could have been different.
If only...
She wondered sometimes what his reaction to finding out about some of her more intimate thoughts about him would be. Surprised, maybe? Disturbed? He hadn't denied it when she'd said he loved her like a daughter no matter how much she'd wanted him to. Daughters, however, didn't have the kind of thoughts she had about him about their fathers.
Not the emotionally healthy and mentally sound ones, anyway.
She'd given up wondering what was wrong with her, wondering what she could do to make him see her in a different light. Her confidence had taken a knock when he'd flirted openly with Holly Snow, started his strange imitation of a relationship with Margaret Allison Hart... She wanted that back, wanted to go back to being the Abby she had been what felt like a lifetime ago...
And that was why she'd said yes. If Scarlet Secret accepted her, were willing to employ her, it meant someone still thought of her as being attractive, desirable. It meant she wasn't so far removed from the woman she'd once been.
Her reasons, Abby told herself harshly, were stupid and shallow, but she silenced the voice in her head that told her that. Her ego needed a boost and, while McGee and Tony and even Ziva would have been happy to reassure her should she decide to explain how she was feeling, she knew there'd always be a part of her that didn't believe them.
McGee was a sweetheart, and their past romantic relationship meant she'd only be inviting confusion and complications if she approached him about the subject. She loved him but not in the way she knew he deserved and didn't want to initiate any kind of conversation that might make him think she wanted to reignite that particular spark.
Tony would flirt and flatter, his affection for her as real as her adoration for him. There'd been a time when they could have tried a romantic relationship - a time when it would have been successful, Abby suspected, but that time was gone. Years of friendship stood in the way of it now, a friendship unlike any she could remember having before and couldn't risk losing. No, Tony would be sweet and supportive but he'd worry about the cause of her crisis in confidence, would want to try and fix it, and he'd only be frustrated and disappointed with himself when he couldn't.
Ziva would get mad at her - in an exasperated, caring way. The former Mossad Liaison would then demand to know who or what had made her feel inferior and she'd suggest physical violence against whoever or whatever it was. The thought of Ziva's reaction made Abby smile in spite of herself; the woman she'd once been determined not to like had become her closest female friend and, while she still missed the late Kate Todd, she wouldn't change Ziva for anything.
The ding of the elevator signalled the arrival of someone on her level and the beep of one of her machines gave her a pretty good idea of who it could be. While she might feel uncertain and insecure about the nature of her personal relationship with Gibbs, they were professionally as synchronised as they ever had been.
She clicked the button on her mouse, typed a few commands onto the keyboard and studied the results in preparation for the questions she knew were coming.
****
"You want to tell me what the hell you're thinking, Abby?"
The information on the screen couldn't supply her with an answer to that question and it took Abby a few seconds longer to register the anger in his tone. She glanced over his shoulder at the trio of agents who traipsed in after him but their expressions, ranging from stony to concerned to intrigued, told her they would be of little to no help when it came to dealing with his temper.
"I'm thinking Major Mass Spec found traces of a really expensive massage oil on Lieutenant Davenports clothes and we might be able to connect the brand to a specific girl at Scarlet Secret," Abby said eventually. She looked at him through purposely wide green eyes, an innocent look she'd almost perfected on her face. "I'll try to look around when I'm there, see if I can find someone who uses the same products..." A small noise had her turning away from the computer screen, back to Gibbs with a wide-eyed look that wasn't faked. "Did you just growl at me?"
"Ballistics lab, Abby. Now." Fire flashed in Gibbs' blue eyes, warning her not to disobey. She shrugged and threw a questioning glance towards the others, noting with dismay that they all seemed to find something else to look at, leaving her no other option but the follow the unmistakable order.
Her back straight, her shoulders tense, Abby led the way to the ballistics lab where Gibbs could both berate and interrogate her in private.
****
There was a beat of silence following their departure.
"Gibbs is very angry," Ziva commented quietly. "I do not believe I have seen him so... tense."
"He's worried about her," McGee defended their boss, noticing the speculative look exchanged by his teammates. "You know how he gets about Abby."
Tony craned his neck to look in the direction their boss and forensic specialist had one. "He doesn't usually get so riled," he murmured thoughtfully. "Gibbs being calm and angry is scary enough but that..."
"You would prefer him to seethe in silence?" Ziva wondered aloud. "For him to take his anger out on us?"
For a moment, Tony considered her words. Considered the force behind the slaps to the back of the head Gibbs delivered on a normal day, then considered how much they'd hurt if there was any real force behind them. "No, not really. But this... He's angry. Really angry. That's not very Gibbs like..."
"Maybe he knows something we don't," McGee mused. "Maybe he's got reason to be worried about her."
Neither Tony nor Ziva said anything, both straining to hear the impossible through the soundproof doors of the ballistic lab.
****
She leaned against the wall opposite the door, trying not to let her nerves show on her face. Abby waited with a fading supply of patience for him to speak, his anger fuelling her own as he ran a hand through his hair but still said nothing.
"If you have a problem with Director Vance's request, I suggest you take it up with him," Abby said eventually, struggling to keep her voice even.
Gibbs treated her to a glare that would have had a lesser woman or one of his agents quailing where they stood. Abby, unaccustomed to having that particular look aimed at her, stood her ground. "It's not your job," he ground out after a long pause. "You should have said no."
"I could have said no," Abby corrected, "but should have? I'm not so sure, Gibbs. If the Director and Ms. Snow are right and my previous experience with Scarlet Secret will get me through the front door, I should use that to my advantage. NCIS should use it."
"No. There'd be other ways, other people..." He broke off and glared at her again. "You're not trained for this. I know Ziva's taught you basic self-defence but..."
"But nothing. I know enough to take care of myself and it's not like I'll be completely on my own. You heard the Director," Abby reminded him with an air of calmness she didn't feel inside. "I'll be linked to a team outside - your team. If there's any trouble, I'll call for backup."
"If there's trouble," Gibbs repeated darkly. "There'll be trouble all over the place, Abby. You do realise what you'll be expected to do. How you'll have to convince them you really want a contract..."
"Sex is a just another tool of the trade, like your badge or gun." Her tone was matter-of-fact. "You've used it professionally before. So have the others. If it comes down to it, so will I. It won't mean anything."
"It always means something to you," he retorted sharply, blue eyes narrowing. "You told me that."
One shoulder rose and fell in a casual shrug even as her blood quickened at him remembering their conversation. "It doesn't have to. Besides, if all goes to plan, I'll supposedly entertain a few agents and be convincing enough without having to see any real clients. If it doesn't, well, I'm a big girl. I know what to do and how to fake it." A humourless smile curved her lips but didn't do anything to disguise the hint of apprehension in her eyes. "Most women do."
Something she couldn't read flickered over his face. "You're not doing this, Abby. You're not a..."
"An agent? Or a whore?" Gibbs flinched but Abby held his gaze. "Which is bothering you the most, Agent Gibbs? The fact I'm not an agent or the thought that I don't have any issues with what I might have to do? You wouldn't have this much of a problem with the situation if it was Ziva going undercover and I know you don't have issues with the whole prostitution thing because you had no problem dating Holly Snow - and yes, I know all about your dinner date with her. You should really know better than to make plans in the bullpen, Gibbs. There's always someone listening." She waved a hand to silence him when it looked like he was about to protest. "So you don't have a problem with using sex to get what you want or with women who get paid to do it so this problem must be me, right? Either you think I'm going to screw this up - no pun intended - or you're taking the overprotective father thing to new levels."
She took a deep breath but continued before he could interrupt. "Two things, Gibbs. One, while I get that you don't find me physically attractive, I can assure you that other men do and some of them might just be attracted enough to get Scarlet Secret interested in me. Two, you are not my father nor am I a child. I don't need your permission or your blessing to do this."
There was a long pause. Almost too long. Abby almost considered apologising but Gibbs broke the silence first, his gaze intense as it locked with hers.
"You think I have a problem believing you can pull this off? That I don't think you're attractive enough?" His expression was closed to her, his voice low and almost entirely without emotion. "Is that why you think I have a problem with this?"
"Well, that, and because you see me like a child and no father wants his daughter to sell herself for money... Unless he's her pimp, but that's all kinds of wrong." She tried to keep the resignation out of her voice but wasn't sure she'd been successful at the look that flittered over his features. "That's it, right? I mean, if it's not because of either of those reasons..."
Gibbs said nothing. He looked at her, leaving her with the impression he was trying to convey something with his eyes, something important he couldn't quite put into words.
Something Abby couldn't understand.
She shook her head and broke eye contact. "I don't know what you want me to say, Gibbs. I agreed to do this and I'm going to. I wish I could do it without you being disappointed in me or whatever it is you are but that's obviously not going to happen."
She didn't wait for him to argue and brushed passed him to the door of the ballistics lab. She found herself hoping he'd reach out for her, stop her from leaving. She even hesitated for a split second to give him more of a chance to do so.
A disappointed sigh she couldn't hold back escaped her but she held her head high and walked out to rejoin the others.
****
Author: Jo. R (driftingatdusk)
Rating: FR-15 overall, one FR-18 scene that will be labelled later on.
Category: Drama, Case-file, Romance (Gibbs/Abby), Abby/Tony Friendship, Ziva/Abby Friendship
Pairing: Gibbs/Abby
Spoilers: 'Forced Entry', 'Guilty Pleasure', up to and including the season seven finale.
Summary: Holly Snow makes a request for help that puts Gibbs and Abby at odds.
****
Part Two
****
Even the steady pounding of the bass on one of her favourite songs didn't seem to help steady her nerves. Abby tapped her foot in time with the beat, her hands braced against her work counter as she waited for her babies to produce some results from the tests she was running.
There wasn't a crime scene to speak of; Holly Snow's contact had disappeared and the SecNav's nephew had been found in an alleyway away from where the attack had taken place, an alley where any evidence that might have been lingering had been washed away by the rain that had fallen that night. The would-be brothel had denied all knowledge of the assault and had politely refused them entry to the building when their lawyers had produced written papers that denied the Metro cops who'd initially pulled the case from entering the premises.
All she had to work on were the clothes Lieutenant Davenport had been wearing and the hope that she'd find something - some tiny trace of DNA everyone else had missed that the rain hadn't destroyed. She wasn't holding her breath, though. She knew she could hope and pray and regret her decision to take the undercover assignment with all of her mite but nothing would chance. It wouldn't magically provide closure to the case and mean she could gracefully back out without feeling like a failure or a fool or both.
She was already questioning herself and her motives for agreeing to it. She could say she'd felt intimidated by the presence of so many of what she considered to be important people. She could say she'd felt moved by Holly's plea to find her former colleague or that she'd sympathised with the plight of SecNav's nephew and had just wanted to help because she was a good person but even that, while partly true, wasn't the full story.
Though the thought of what she might have to do terrified her on one level, the reaction of the man who'd been standing behind her had cemented her decision. Feeling the warmth of his hand, the strength of calloused fingers gripping her shoulder, the softness of the fingertips that had grazed the bare skin of her neck...
Abby squared her shoulders against the shiver that ran up her spine, her hands clenching on the work surface in front of her momentarily. She knew it was hopeless - told herself it was every other minute - but she couldn't stop the thrill that went through her every time she remembered his touch and imagined how it could have been different.
If only...
She wondered sometimes what his reaction to finding out about some of her more intimate thoughts about him would be. Surprised, maybe? Disturbed? He hadn't denied it when she'd said he loved her like a daughter no matter how much she'd wanted him to. Daughters, however, didn't have the kind of thoughts she had about him about their fathers.
Not the emotionally healthy and mentally sound ones, anyway.
She'd given up wondering what was wrong with her, wondering what she could do to make him see her in a different light. Her confidence had taken a knock when he'd flirted openly with Holly Snow, started his strange imitation of a relationship with Margaret Allison Hart... She wanted that back, wanted to go back to being the Abby she had been what felt like a lifetime ago...
And that was why she'd said yes. If Scarlet Secret accepted her, were willing to employ her, it meant someone still thought of her as being attractive, desirable. It meant she wasn't so far removed from the woman she'd once been.
Her reasons, Abby told herself harshly, were stupid and shallow, but she silenced the voice in her head that told her that. Her ego needed a boost and, while McGee and Tony and even Ziva would have been happy to reassure her should she decide to explain how she was feeling, she knew there'd always be a part of her that didn't believe them.
McGee was a sweetheart, and their past romantic relationship meant she'd only be inviting confusion and complications if she approached him about the subject. She loved him but not in the way she knew he deserved and didn't want to initiate any kind of conversation that might make him think she wanted to reignite that particular spark.
Tony would flirt and flatter, his affection for her as real as her adoration for him. There'd been a time when they could have tried a romantic relationship - a time when it would have been successful, Abby suspected, but that time was gone. Years of friendship stood in the way of it now, a friendship unlike any she could remember having before and couldn't risk losing. No, Tony would be sweet and supportive but he'd worry about the cause of her crisis in confidence, would want to try and fix it, and he'd only be frustrated and disappointed with himself when he couldn't.
Ziva would get mad at her - in an exasperated, caring way. The former Mossad Liaison would then demand to know who or what had made her feel inferior and she'd suggest physical violence against whoever or whatever it was. The thought of Ziva's reaction made Abby smile in spite of herself; the woman she'd once been determined not to like had become her closest female friend and, while she still missed the late Kate Todd, she wouldn't change Ziva for anything.
The ding of the elevator signalled the arrival of someone on her level and the beep of one of her machines gave her a pretty good idea of who it could be. While she might feel uncertain and insecure about the nature of her personal relationship with Gibbs, they were professionally as synchronised as they ever had been.
She clicked the button on her mouse, typed a few commands onto the keyboard and studied the results in preparation for the questions she knew were coming.
****
"You want to tell me what the hell you're thinking, Abby?"
The information on the screen couldn't supply her with an answer to that question and it took Abby a few seconds longer to register the anger in his tone. She glanced over his shoulder at the trio of agents who traipsed in after him but their expressions, ranging from stony to concerned to intrigued, told her they would be of little to no help when it came to dealing with his temper.
"I'm thinking Major Mass Spec found traces of a really expensive massage oil on Lieutenant Davenports clothes and we might be able to connect the brand to a specific girl at Scarlet Secret," Abby said eventually. She looked at him through purposely wide green eyes, an innocent look she'd almost perfected on her face. "I'll try to look around when I'm there, see if I can find someone who uses the same products..." A small noise had her turning away from the computer screen, back to Gibbs with a wide-eyed look that wasn't faked. "Did you just growl at me?"
"Ballistics lab, Abby. Now." Fire flashed in Gibbs' blue eyes, warning her not to disobey. She shrugged and threw a questioning glance towards the others, noting with dismay that they all seemed to find something else to look at, leaving her no other option but the follow the unmistakable order.
Her back straight, her shoulders tense, Abby led the way to the ballistics lab where Gibbs could both berate and interrogate her in private.
****
There was a beat of silence following their departure.
"Gibbs is very angry," Ziva commented quietly. "I do not believe I have seen him so... tense."
"He's worried about her," McGee defended their boss, noticing the speculative look exchanged by his teammates. "You know how he gets about Abby."
Tony craned his neck to look in the direction their boss and forensic specialist had one. "He doesn't usually get so riled," he murmured thoughtfully. "Gibbs being calm and angry is scary enough but that..."
"You would prefer him to seethe in silence?" Ziva wondered aloud. "For him to take his anger out on us?"
For a moment, Tony considered her words. Considered the force behind the slaps to the back of the head Gibbs delivered on a normal day, then considered how much they'd hurt if there was any real force behind them. "No, not really. But this... He's angry. Really angry. That's not very Gibbs like..."
"Maybe he knows something we don't," McGee mused. "Maybe he's got reason to be worried about her."
Neither Tony nor Ziva said anything, both straining to hear the impossible through the soundproof doors of the ballistic lab.
****
She leaned against the wall opposite the door, trying not to let her nerves show on her face. Abby waited with a fading supply of patience for him to speak, his anger fuelling her own as he ran a hand through his hair but still said nothing.
"If you have a problem with Director Vance's request, I suggest you take it up with him," Abby said eventually, struggling to keep her voice even.
Gibbs treated her to a glare that would have had a lesser woman or one of his agents quailing where they stood. Abby, unaccustomed to having that particular look aimed at her, stood her ground. "It's not your job," he ground out after a long pause. "You should have said no."
"I could have said no," Abby corrected, "but should have? I'm not so sure, Gibbs. If the Director and Ms. Snow are right and my previous experience with Scarlet Secret will get me through the front door, I should use that to my advantage. NCIS should use it."
"No. There'd be other ways, other people..." He broke off and glared at her again. "You're not trained for this. I know Ziva's taught you basic self-defence but..."
"But nothing. I know enough to take care of myself and it's not like I'll be completely on my own. You heard the Director," Abby reminded him with an air of calmness she didn't feel inside. "I'll be linked to a team outside - your team. If there's any trouble, I'll call for backup."
"If there's trouble," Gibbs repeated darkly. "There'll be trouble all over the place, Abby. You do realise what you'll be expected to do. How you'll have to convince them you really want a contract..."
"Sex is a just another tool of the trade, like your badge or gun." Her tone was matter-of-fact. "You've used it professionally before. So have the others. If it comes down to it, so will I. It won't mean anything."
"It always means something to you," he retorted sharply, blue eyes narrowing. "You told me that."
One shoulder rose and fell in a casual shrug even as her blood quickened at him remembering their conversation. "It doesn't have to. Besides, if all goes to plan, I'll supposedly entertain a few agents and be convincing enough without having to see any real clients. If it doesn't, well, I'm a big girl. I know what to do and how to fake it." A humourless smile curved her lips but didn't do anything to disguise the hint of apprehension in her eyes. "Most women do."
Something she couldn't read flickered over his face. "You're not doing this, Abby. You're not a..."
"An agent? Or a whore?" Gibbs flinched but Abby held his gaze. "Which is bothering you the most, Agent Gibbs? The fact I'm not an agent or the thought that I don't have any issues with what I might have to do? You wouldn't have this much of a problem with the situation if it was Ziva going undercover and I know you don't have issues with the whole prostitution thing because you had no problem dating Holly Snow - and yes, I know all about your dinner date with her. You should really know better than to make plans in the bullpen, Gibbs. There's always someone listening." She waved a hand to silence him when it looked like he was about to protest. "So you don't have a problem with using sex to get what you want or with women who get paid to do it so this problem must be me, right? Either you think I'm going to screw this up - no pun intended - or you're taking the overprotective father thing to new levels."
She took a deep breath but continued before he could interrupt. "Two things, Gibbs. One, while I get that you don't find me physically attractive, I can assure you that other men do and some of them might just be attracted enough to get Scarlet Secret interested in me. Two, you are not my father nor am I a child. I don't need your permission or your blessing to do this."
There was a long pause. Almost too long. Abby almost considered apologising but Gibbs broke the silence first, his gaze intense as it locked with hers.
"You think I have a problem believing you can pull this off? That I don't think you're attractive enough?" His expression was closed to her, his voice low and almost entirely without emotion. "Is that why you think I have a problem with this?"
"Well, that, and because you see me like a child and no father wants his daughter to sell herself for money... Unless he's her pimp, but that's all kinds of wrong." She tried to keep the resignation out of her voice but wasn't sure she'd been successful at the look that flittered over his features. "That's it, right? I mean, if it's not because of either of those reasons..."
Gibbs said nothing. He looked at her, leaving her with the impression he was trying to convey something with his eyes, something important he couldn't quite put into words.
Something Abby couldn't understand.
She shook her head and broke eye contact. "I don't know what you want me to say, Gibbs. I agreed to do this and I'm going to. I wish I could do it without you being disappointed in me or whatever it is you are but that's obviously not going to happen."
She didn't wait for him to argue and brushed passed him to the door of the ballistics lab. She found herself hoping he'd reach out for her, stop her from leaving. She even hesitated for a split second to give him more of a chance to do so.
A disappointed sigh she couldn't hold back escaped her but she held her head high and walked out to rejoin the others.
****