} 040 - [TEXT] - mostly public

[creatingalegacy]

Free information time is fucking over. No more. Talk all you want, think what you want--it doesn't matter anymore, does it?

But you're not getting anything else from me. Bunch of fucking vultures, that's all you people are.

[Private to Sarah]
[The connection is open for while before Amanda types anything. She doesn't, for now, mention having

Comments

Private

[whattheytellyou]

You have me.

And you have you.

You know, you didn't tell me anything I couldn't have gleaned from your file. And you learned things about me as well.

Re: Private

[creatingalegacy]

I admitted to being weak. I told people...I said things to them that I didn't even fucking consciously acknowledge, Sarah! On public filters! Things I refuse to believe!

I learned a lot about you. The entire Barge learned almost everything about me!

Private

[whattheytellyou]

Okay.

What do you want to do?

Re: Private

[creatingalegacy]

I want to take it all back, but that isn't going to fucking work, now is it!

Tell me what I have to do. I need you to tell me!

Private

[whattheytellyou]

I want you to tell me what needs to be done.

What are your options? Pretend it never happened? Shout at everyone and make them inclined to mock you for it? Or move on and accept that everyone got a shot of embarrassment out of that flood?

Re: Private

[creatingalegacy]

It's not fucking embarrassment, Sarah! If it were I wouldn't be like this! I talked about killing people and liking it. I said that John hadn't always done right by me and I refuse to believe that! Everyone knows now what a failure I am. I'm not a genius, I'm not a messenger, and I'm no fucking good as a daughter. I'm just a murderer.

I can't tell you what needs to be done because I don't fucking know! I need you to do something...give me some kind of order to carry out! Give me something I can follow!

Private

[whattheytellyou]

No.

Amanda, I will be here for you, and I will listen to you, and I'll do what needs to be done, but I will not give you orders.

I want you to make decisions for yourself.

Re: Private

[creatingalegacy]

You know what fucking happens when I make my own decisions! Everything falls apart!

I'm not good at living unless I have someone to serve. That, at least, I can believe. You have my file, you should know it too.

Private

[whattheytellyou]

How are you going to get any better at living without servitude unless you try?

Okay. You want an order? Don't kill or hurt anyone. That's an order for you.

Re: Private

[creatingalegacy]

You don't have the right to give that order, Sarah. I know that now.

Private

[whattheytellyou]

You have my file.

Re: Private

[creatingalegacy]

I do.

Tell me, what's the difference between what you did to Dodgson and what I did to Matthews?

Private

[whattheytellyou]

I didn't torture Dodgson. He tried to kill me - twice - and I...

Saved myself.

It doesn't excuse it. I spend a lot of time wondering if I'll be an inmate here, myself. One of these days.

Re: Private

[creatingalegacy]

I didn't torture Matthews, either.

I didn't have a chance.

[She just beat him within an inch of his life and left him for dead! That's SO much better.]

I assume you want this back, but I think I'd rather keep it. It's only fair, considering you've had access to my file since the second you were assigned to me.

Private

[whattheytellyou]

Keep it. I don't have anything to hide. There's nothing in my file I wouldn't have told you if you asked.

Re: Private

[creatingalegacy]

Bullshit! You wouldn't have said a goddamn thing about murdering someone if I'd asked you!