A secret to my grave : Chapter 3
Title: A secret to my grave
Author: creamymint
Pairing: Asami/Akihito
Spoilers: None… I guess?
Summary: "Why didn't you tell me, Akihito? Why?" Asami snarl dangerously, hovering over Akihito. "Even if I told you, you can't fix this Asami. Not this time."
Word Count: 2443
Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Yamane Ayano.
Author's note: ell, this one is a bit long. Don’t know what overcome me… but oh well. Hope you enjoy this chapter. And yep, my grammar still sucks people...
Chapter 3: The Longing
The night was bliss for the couple. The next morning, however, was a different story. Akihito woke up feeling as if he was electrocuted. His whole body was sore. His ass sore so much that Akihito wished he was comatose instead! In fact, he should have just slept the whole day. It’s not like he had anything scheduled… well, not anymore. Following Miya-san’s advice, he had declined any elaborate jobs and that included snooping around the underworld. It has become too dangerous for him. True, Akihito was reluctant to let go of his job (his hobby even) at first, but the reminder of his last stakeout gave him the final blow. If it wasn’t for that one miracle, he would be dead now.
With a heavy sigh, Akihito heaves his body up with his right elbow, his gaze falling upon the opposite side of the bed. Unsurprisingly enough, Asami was no longer beside him. Perhaps he has already gone out. The sound of running waters from the bathroom answered his musing. Akihito flung his leg over the bed slowly. He sat on the edge of the bed, taking huge gulps of air when the pain shot up through his back. He groans trying to ease the pain.
That’s it! No more sex for the rest of the week! Akihito screams silently in frustration. Though he knew very well that it will fall on deaf ears if Asami was involved. If Asami stares him down with that oh so intense gaze that promise him a lot of pleasure, he will surely give in right there and then. He sighs again.
“This is a rare sight” an amused smooth voice startled Akihito form his musings. Akihito looked up and he was greeted by the sight of Asami in a towel leaning against the wall. He silently curse himself when his heart picked up pace just at the sight of the older man. He could feel a blush working its way to his cheeks the longer he stared at those chiseled wet body.
“What?” Akihito asked, annoyed. Asami should know very well that he wasn’t a morning person. Especially if they had just have three rounds of hard sex the night before. Akihito always ends up cranky in the morning. Who wouldn’t? He was the one at the receiving end after all!
“I knew something was strange the moment I heard that sigh” Asami strolled towards him “What aren’t you telling me, Akihito? What are you hiding so intently… that you didn’t even complained how I handled you last night?” he drawled on, a smirk evident on his face.
“Though I must say, I enjoyed your performance” his voice was laced with amusement. Akihito could only blush deeply at that. He gritted his teeth in frustration. The bastard sure has a way with words to make it sound like he had been the one to seduce the older man.
“Like I said, it’s none of your damn business!” Akihito snapped angrily. “I just had a fight with Kou, that’s all. Since when do you care if I mope around anyway?” Akihito surprises himself that he could make up such a lame excuse. It’s not his fault anyway, he basically couldn’t think straight at the moment. He thought with the distraction last night, Asami would not think about it so much. It surprises him that the older man seems more intent to know now than ever.
“You’ve made it my business the moment you cried yourself to sleep last night” Asami state the matter of fact. “And that doesn’t seem like a small matter to me.”
Akihito was flabbergasted. He didn’t know that Asami had noticed. He thought the older man was unaware of how he’d woken up in the middle of the night after a series of nightmares. He was shaken so badly that he couldn’t stop the tear from falling. He’d made sure to stifle his sobs when that happened. He didn’t want Asami to be aware of his uneasiness…not yet.
And now since Asami had seen that episode, there’s no way in denying it. Something did happen to him. Akihito hung his head in defeat. He has to tell the truth, but it doesn’t mean he has to tell about his condition. Maybe he could tell about his failed stakeout attempt instead. It did somehow leave a big impact in him after all. He needs just the right amount of truthfulness in his words to convince Asami not to pry any further.
“I just…” he trailed off uneasily. “I was shot at on my last stakeout. But its okay, nothing else happened. Though maybe I unconsciously worried about it since… the bullet did misses my head by an inch…” before he knew it, a tear spilled down his cheek. Maybe he was shaken by that incident after all. But his mind had been so occupied with the disease that he couldn’t care less about that tiny incident where he might die. Now, he really was going to die
Within seconds, he was engulfed in an embrace. He could no longer hide the sorrow in his heart. He cried openly in Asami’s arms. Successfully trapping the actual truth from his lover. The last thing he remembered before he closes his eyes was Asami’s voice comforting him. Promising that he’ll settle the incident for him. That everything was going to be fixed. Akihito could only smile bitterly at that. If only Asami know.
It can’t be fixed, Asami. Not this time…
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Two days later, Japan was shaken by the news of the imprisonment of a Diet member who was dealing with the leader of Yamakura Group (a small yakuza group in Tokyo prefecture) who had surprisingly enough found dead in his house. Paramedics had stated that he died by natural causes, most likely a heart-attack. Akihito’s eyes twitch uncomfortably as he reads on. The news was so genuine that even he would fall victim to it… only if he didn’t know what had actually happened. It’s not a coincidence that the group’s leader was the one Akihito had followed in his last stakeout. Even the timing was too perfect. Right after he had told Asami about the thugs…
Akihito shudders uncomfortably. He knew that Asami was behind it, one way or another. He was sure about it. What had convinced him even more was the fact that he found the newspaper strategically placed beside his bed, so that when he open his eyes, he will see the front page first before anything else. Asami didn’t say a word about it. He had acted normally, as if what he had done was as simple as reciting the alphabet in order. Akihito was once again reminded that Asami was a dangerous man. Ironic enough, Akihito found comfort in the arms of this dangerous man. He couldn’t help but smile at his predicament.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Akihito was thankful that his symptoms seem to have a way with him when Asami was nowhere near. Even he starts to wonder if this was all psychologically triggered. When Asami was around, he was as healthy as ever (thank god for that!). But once Asami turned his back on him, all hell broke loose. He would fall, tripped, roll over (well, not technically) and all kinds of things you can name of behind Asami’s back. Once he did tripped over a rug and was saved from utter humiliation in front of Asami by grabbing the curtains near him. He whisked the uncertainty with his stupid grin which Asami returned by an amused smirk before a passionate “off to work” kiss.
Things seem to run smoothly with Asami, but Akihito was uncertain of his current condition. Lately, he had difficulties ditching Asami’s goons. If before he could easily run through alleys, jumping over walls… now, he had to give all of his effort to do those stunts. His legs felt weak and numb all the time. His knees gave way at unpredictable moment that caused him quite a distress when he was out working on his assignments. He couldn’t bend his legs to support him enough when he tried to take photographs from low angles. All in all, Akihito was becoming quite stressed. He was angry. Angry at himself. Angry at his disease. Angry at Miya-san for delivering him the dreadful news. Angry at the people around him who seems to be having a time of their life. He was basically angry at everything!
Sometimes Akihito caught himself thinking of stabbing his own damned legs which was a burden to him now. He tried to stray away from that suicidal thought. He knew that anger could lead him doing more harm than good. And since he had been upset and angry at himself, the thought keeps on haunting him. Outwardly, he was all cheery and happy. The same young man who was stubborn enough to ditch the goons to be free. The same cheerful smile. Holds the same passion for photography. But inwardly, he was suffering. Suffering so much that his heart squeezed in pain whenever Asami embraced him. He felt guilt weighing in his heart. Guilty for fooling the older man. Guilty for not sharing his misery when he knew that Asami cared enough for him.
He should let him know, he should. But every time he sees his lover’s eyes, he became scared to utter those words. Scared enough that he bit his tongue not to let the words slip out of his mouth. His attempt would always lead him to fake a smile at the end, which made him even more depressed than he thought he could get. His mind was in turmoil, and all he could think about was…
Asami. He wanted the man to console him. To take his pain away. Make his mind at peace again. But then again, he was scared. Akihito wonders why he was scared of admitting it loudly. He came to a conclusion that he was merely scared of the future. All he could see now was a dark future ahead of him. There was no salvation and he was trapped in the darkness. Alone. Waiting for the angel of death to fetch his soul and end his long misery.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
“Does it hurt to stand? I thought you’ve gotten used to it” Asami spoke after seeing Akihito fall in a lump right after he stood from the bed. Asami could only chuckle when Akihito growl loudly and gave him a deadly glare. The glare that sends pleasurable shiver down Asami’s spine.
“Whose fault do you think it is?” Akihito snapped bitterly at his lover who was smoking elegantly on the bed with his oh so amused smirk. “You should take responsible for this. Carry me to the bathtub, if you please.”
If Asami wasn’t that surprise to see his lover falling in a lump after their passionate love making, he was now. It’s not an everyday occurrence for Akihito to admit he needs help going to the bathroom. And not only that, he had asked to be carried by Asami. His cute kitten had too much pride to ask such things before. Is this a new way of seducing him? Or he’s simply too much in pain to move on his own?
Asami settles his thought on the first when Akihito gifts him with a naughty smirk of his own. Asami didn’t mind going for another round in the bathroom. Oh, he would love it in fact. The way his lover’s screams vibrates through the walls was exquisite enough to make him come prematurely. Not like he can’t hold on… but still, it was a promising thought indeed.
Sadly though, he had an important meeting in within fifteen minutes and he couldn’t be late. His Akihito had just to wait… that is until the end of the meeting. He could send Suoh to pick up his kitten when it’s over and fuck him senseless over his office’s couch for daring to seduce him when he just didn’t have enough time to relish his lover’s body. Yes, he’ll do just that. Asami took a last drag of his cigarette before stubbing it on the ashtray beside the bed.
He stalked towards Akihito with a mischievous smirk that made Akihito flinch uneasily. Carried Akihito in a bridal style, kissed him senselessly out of his breath before dumping Akihito in the bathtub.
“You’ll pay dearly for arousing me. You know very well that I have to go in about ten minutes” Asami whispered huskily against Akihito’s ears whilst caressing the jawlines of his lover. “But don’t worry, I’ll make sure you’re satisfied enough when we’re done.” Akihito could only shiver in anticipation at that. Asami’s finger lingers adoringly at Akihito’s neck before he stood up and walks towards the shower. He took a quick shower and within seven minutes, he was gone. Leaving Akihito in the bathtub with promises of steamy hot sex.
What Asami didn’t know was the fact that Akihito didn’t even plan on seducing him at first. Akihito couldn’t move even if he wanted to at the moment. If he stayed there without attempting to move like he had before he fall unceremoniously in front of Asami, the older man would certainly become suspicious. He didn’t have any other choice but to ask for Asami’s help without the older man noticing anything…different.
If Asami had taken a good look, Akihito didn’t so much as flinch when he picked the younger man up. If Akihito was indeed in pain after their love making, it would hurt him to be picked up like that. But no, Akihito had different problems. If before he could at least feel the numbness in his legs… right now, it felt as if his legs were chopped off from his body! He couldn’t feel his legs at all. He was paralyzed!
As much as Akihito wanted to panic, he bit down his sobs expertly while waiting patiently for Asami to move out of his line of sight. The moment the entrance door clicked close, Akihito couldn’t hold onto his sobs anymore. He cried piteously while smacking his legs in rage. He could feel the pain he was causing to his legs, but he still couldn’t move an inch. Akihito finally gave up when his legs started to turn red from the beating. He let his gaze lingers at the ceiling, trying to figure out what he should do now. As if by staring, he could solve his current problem. Now that he couldn’t move a muscle.
What the fuck should I do now? Akihito screams silently.
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On a funny note, there's this incident with my mum when I was writing this chapter. She suddenly comes into my room and reads over my back.
Mum: I think you meant "her".
Me: What? *seriously trying to understand what she meant*
Mum: Here... in this sentence *“Whose fault do you think it is?” Akihito snapped bitterly at his lover who was smoking elegantly on the bed with his oh so amused smirk.*
Mum: I think you meant her honey *she said innocently*
Me: Oh.. right... urm... thanks mum *foolish grin*
I'm sooo not writing a BL fic in front of her again. I think she could get a heart-attack. lmao XD