(no subject)
So every time I 'fall off the wagon' and start binge eating (no purge here folks..that would be a waste) and gaining weight I begin this spiral downward into self loathe. It gets so bad that I eat more and soon enough find myself 8-10 lbs heavier then say a month ago and really just not in a good head space.
Well.. I'm there. I am officially disgusted with myself, and know its time to hop back on the wagon, Before I eat myself into a depression so deep I couldn't dig my way out with my ice cream caked spoon.
I don't need a quick fix. I need exercise. A proper diet. I need to allow myself to indulge here and there but not overboard. I need to know that mistakes are going to happen but I can pick myself back up and start again. That being said..I'm sick of 'starting again' and would like to stop giving up in the first place!
I think to do this properly I need to also analyze the underlying issues with my emotion eating and binging. I'm going to have to journal that here as well. But not tonight. I think this is enough babble at 2:15 a.m.
Tomorrow I start again. For the last time.
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.