adjusting

[crazythinker]

I'm slowly learning how to tackle each boy one by one. Some fade in and out on their own, so I think those I'll just have to keep pushing out when they try to come back in, so I'm not too stressed about them I guess. But the ones that are constantly around... laid it straight out for one Thursday night. He was literally begging me to give him a chance and then got all upset and emotional saying how am I going to pass up a chance for love when I don't know what it could be like or what he's after. He keeps telling me he's not like most guys but... he's acting like most guys I've come across - but more determined. Wheather he wants to just torture himself more or not is up to him but... I told him I wasn't interested. One is on hold till November while he's in the brig. Need to figure out what the hell I'm going to say to him as nicely as possible. Another knows I'm not interested but keeps asking to hang out. He understands I just want to be friends but.. I can't keep hanging out with him when I know each time I see him he just likes me more. So.. cut that one off too. I feel like such a jerk but... I dunno what else to do. Can't I just have one guy without complications? Each guy is nice and I like something about each and every one of them but...I dunno. I would rather just be friends with all of them. Like - when I think of them they all give me a FRIEND feeling ya know? But at the same time when I know they like me is that weird to try and be just friends? I dunnooooo. Being single isn't as much fun as I thought it would be.

On another note - I have the most amazing friends in the world.














No idea what I would do without them... honestly the only thing keeping me together this semester.