(no subject)
I've always wanted that best friend you see in the movies, in television shows, that people say they have all the time. I noticed that I am more engaged in movies or television shows that appear to portray that sense of best friendship in the way I've always yearned for.
TV: Lizzie McGuire, Thats So Raven, Phil of The Future, South of Nowhere, Degrassi, etc....
Movies: Garden State, Thirteen, etc....
But as much as I believe, and know, that that friendship can exist...it's unrealistic to, more or less, expect it because it's out there. And instead of embracing the wonderful and caring friendships I do have, I'm pushing that away because it's not what I've always wish I had. I'm sorry. And I know I've been a pain in the ass, I've lost some great friends and great bonds with people all because I couldn't accept life as it is. And that's true about a lot of things in my life. So my goal for college is to embrace life as it is. Look forward to the future and take what you can from the past, but all in all, live my life to its fullest at each and every moment. I know I say this and I'll end up writing shit in here a week later, but it takes me a few years to evolve. I have over the course of highschool and now college will just be another step to further myself. Maybe with changing myself, I'll build stronger relationships with people to the point where I can say I do have that "best friend" I've always wanted, maybe not. But either way, I've failed to point fingers at myself and instead left them pointing at you guys. Once again, I'm sorry. But I know the fact that though I've lost friends in the past, they've come back
...and that means so much.
I love you guys.
TV: Lizzie McGuire, Thats So Raven, Phil of The Future, South of Nowhere, Degrassi, etc....
Movies: Garden State, Thirteen, etc....
But as much as I believe, and know, that that friendship can exist...it's unrealistic to, more or less, expect it because it's out there. And instead of embracing the wonderful and caring friendships I do have, I'm pushing that away because it's not what I've always wish I had. I'm sorry. And I know I've been a pain in the ass, I've lost some great friends and great bonds with people all because I couldn't accept life as it is. And that's true about a lot of things in my life. So my goal for college is to embrace life as it is. Look forward to the future and take what you can from the past, but all in all, live my life to its fullest at each and every moment. I know I say this and I'll end up writing shit in here a week later, but it takes me a few years to evolve. I have over the course of highschool and now college will just be another step to further myself. Maybe with changing myself, I'll build stronger relationships with people to the point where I can say I do have that "best friend" I've always wanted, maybe not. But either way, I've failed to point fingers at myself and instead left them pointing at you guys. Once again, I'm sorry. But I know the fact that though I've lost friends in the past, they've come back
...and that means so much.
I love you guys.