WTF?
what the hell am I doing???? Im so screwed up. I work my whole life to get something. I get it and think... hmmm.. Im not sure if I want this anymore. Hes so damn good to me. What the hell is wrong with me.. why am I so selfish? Im taking everything away from everybody... all I know is something isnt right. I dont know why.. and I dont know what... but something isnt right. I dont want to get a divorce...but I do. I dont want to be without him in my life. I dont want to hurt him. I know I care about him greatly. Grrr... I just want to scream. I want to run away and pretend like Im not Kate. I hate myself for this. But then somehow I feel empowered that Im trying to say whats in my heart. I want to be independant. Ive never been independant. Ive always had someone to lean on.. someone to fall into. I dont want a net. I want to see how strong I am. I want to be who I want to be.. if that makes sense.. I want to not feel like I need someones approval or praise for what Im doing. I dont want to inconvinience anyone... I dont want to hurt anyone.. I want to have alittle fun. I hate that Im hurting Don. what is my deal?