Sep 02, 2005 22:34
Fuck what i said about things falling in to line.i jumped the gun.
the lyrics to Fall Out Boy, "Sugar were going down" the first three lines just hit me.. and i kno what they mean.
Am i more than you bargained for yet?
I've been dieing to tell you
Anything you wanna hear
cuz thats just who i am this week
god i hate the feeling that expresses. and i hate that i kno how it feels. to me its like i try so hard and i care so much in somethings that i feel too much. and thats when i get screwed. almost everthing in my life has felt so one-sided.
theres never been a guy i liked who liked me. and yeah i picked the wrong guys before.. like seriously some of them i dont kno what i was thinking. but theres at least one that i am dieing to see if i have been right. but i refuse to get to that point where i am telling them anything they want to hear.. cuz i cant bare to loose myself again. and i just cant bring myself to put my heart on the line again. god i wish i had any answers.
and i wish that boys were not as afraid as me. i wish they did the "boy" things. i wish the boys i like could see the good in me. hell they can even see the bad. just as long as they can live with it like i can. im just so messed up in my head right now. i wish anything was easy.