(no subject)
ive been cryen since 10:00 this morning i dont know where all these tears are comming from i literally have nothing left to cry up yet the tears keep flowing...i never cried over someone as much as im crying over him..is this because maybe for once i was happy and i was actually in love with someone...i hope and pray were not done forever liek he says but i dont see how we could ever be together ever again if he doesnt trust me and doesnt believe anything i have to say. nothing i say matters no matter how hard i try to tell everyone the trusth it wont matter because everyone has it set in there minds that i fucked gabe well everyone wake up and listen to yourselfs...there are only 2 people that really fucken know what went on that night me and gabe and im tellen you that nothing happened at all...god i wish someone would just believe me since no one does..the only person i want to believe me doesnt and hes already made it clear that he doesnt and wont and that im just a liar and thats all i will ever be god damn it i love nick so much and i just want him to know that and want him to know that i wouldnt hurt him in any way...im so sorry that he doesnt believe me about that shit with gabe and gabe fuck you i know you think its funny that everyone takes this shit so serisouly and you explained to me that it was a joke...and that you didnt think n e one really believed you and that you were joking but its not fucken funny because fucken me over...i know in my heart that me n nick are goign to be together we have to be cuz he makes me happy and ill fucken wait ill wait till he relizes that i was the best fucken thing that happened to him and i cared about him so much and did everything i could to make him happy ill wait till he sees that and wen hes ready to take me bak till then ill be in my fucken bed cryen and cryen and thinking about how much happier i was wen we were together and how much i love him and how he doesnt love me liek i love him and how i never ever felt liek this before and how i wish i could get a new fucken heart cuz mynes deffinitly broken...btw my birthdays in 9 days...im outtie