Hello all
Oh my lord I have not written in this crazy ass thing in a long time but I think I am going to start using more often. I usally always take a break during the summer but go right back at once school starts again.
I'm excited to start school again :) but at the same time pretty upset that I have to take night classes I am not looking forward to that. I feel like I am going to be the youngest one and wont be able to meet other new friends. Oh well we shall see.
So I have been doing a lot of thinking lately and I am just so damn confused with my life. I want so many different things in my life right now. I want the freedom of being on my own and I want that feeling of being in a relationship again. Oh do I miss the feel of a guy. God it sucks to be single.
I was seriously thinking about moving out a few weeks ago and then I fucken flipped out on myself and convinced myself that I wasnt ready when I know damn well I am ready to move out. I dont know what my problem is one minute I am totally ready then the next I freak out. I'm most concerned about the finanical responsibilities that come with living on my own. I admit that I do have a problem with shopping and its not something to laugh about I really do have a problem its definintly an addiction just as drugs are an addiction to some, shopping is my drug to make me feel better. I think I have spent more money on clothes and what not then I have ever before. Something is wrong with this picture.
Oh god I just have so much on my chest and im sick of holding it all in. I want to start working on my book that I have so wanted to begin writing ever since Tony left but continued to put it off. I'm afraid to let all the emotions leave me and be all out on the table for all of you to read some day. The focus of the entire book is going to be based on my relationship with Tony and all of the heartache I had to endure the entire time we were together. Dont get me wrong I absoultly loved him but I would hate to see someone else have to go through with what I went through. It's not fair and relationships like that consume your life. There phyiscally demanding and take a lot out of you to maintain.
This book is going to be in electronic format now through livejournal. The user name is
untoldstoriesfs
I would like all to view it whenever they want and provide comments if needed.
Well that all I have to say for now.
I'm excited to start school again :) but at the same time pretty upset that I have to take night classes I am not looking forward to that. I feel like I am going to be the youngest one and wont be able to meet other new friends. Oh well we shall see.
So I have been doing a lot of thinking lately and I am just so damn confused with my life. I want so many different things in my life right now. I want the freedom of being on my own and I want that feeling of being in a relationship again. Oh do I miss the feel of a guy. God it sucks to be single.
I was seriously thinking about moving out a few weeks ago and then I fucken flipped out on myself and convinced myself that I wasnt ready when I know damn well I am ready to move out. I dont know what my problem is one minute I am totally ready then the next I freak out. I'm most concerned about the finanical responsibilities that come with living on my own. I admit that I do have a problem with shopping and its not something to laugh about I really do have a problem its definintly an addiction just as drugs are an addiction to some, shopping is my drug to make me feel better. I think I have spent more money on clothes and what not then I have ever before. Something is wrong with this picture.
Oh god I just have so much on my chest and im sick of holding it all in. I want to start working on my book that I have so wanted to begin writing ever since Tony left but continued to put it off. I'm afraid to let all the emotions leave me and be all out on the table for all of you to read some day. The focus of the entire book is going to be based on my relationship with Tony and all of the heartache I had to endure the entire time we were together. Dont get me wrong I absoultly loved him but I would hate to see someone else have to go through with what I went through. It's not fair and relationships like that consume your life. There phyiscally demanding and take a lot out of you to maintain.
This book is going to be in electronic format now through livejournal. The user name is
untoldstoriesfs
I would like all to view it whenever they want and provide comments if needed.
Well that all I have to say for now.