(no subject)
Why did the time on my computer say December 31, 2003 11:15pm??? Why in the WORLD is it retarded? why? It pisses me off.
Why did Ms. B embarrass me even MORE in front of the whole cast? To make me feel even more stupid? Bitch. Is it to make me work harder? Good idea! I'm going to. For myself. THAT kind of pissed me off.
Why did I come home in a bad mood then my mom told me I might not be able to go to Iowa State? I only cried because I don't want to disappoint them. I'm still going there. So I think I'm happy now. I'm not sure anymore. That didn't piss me off. I love my family.
Why did I cry even more and still feel miserable? Beats me. I'm guessing my hate/anger/i don't even know, got to me and I yelled at Tessa. She's only trying to help. And I yelled at her. I'm a bitch. I'm a fucking bitch. And I pissed myself off.
Why did I take my pillow and try to beat my bed to death? Because I'm pissed, and that's the only pathetic way I could've released my anger.
Why did I write this? Because I'm pissed, and online journals area good way of letting shit out, don't you think?
Why am I still writing? I don't know. I'm going to practice the dances I disappointed Ms. B with and am not improving on and looking shitty on and just totally SUCK all together on probably all night.
Sometimes I ooze with sarcasm.
Why did Ms. B embarrass me even MORE in front of the whole cast? To make me feel even more stupid? Bitch. Is it to make me work harder? Good idea! I'm going to. For myself. THAT kind of pissed me off.
Why did I come home in a bad mood then my mom told me I might not be able to go to Iowa State? I only cried because I don't want to disappoint them. I'm still going there. So I think I'm happy now. I'm not sure anymore. That didn't piss me off. I love my family.
Why did I cry even more and still feel miserable? Beats me. I'm guessing my hate/anger/i don't even know, got to me and I yelled at Tessa. She's only trying to help. And I yelled at her. I'm a bitch. I'm a fucking bitch. And I pissed myself off.
Why did I take my pillow and try to beat my bed to death? Because I'm pissed, and that's the only pathetic way I could've released my anger.
Why did I write this? Because I'm pissed, and online journals area good way of letting shit out, don't you think?
Why am I still writing? I don't know. I'm going to practice the dances I disappointed Ms. B with and am not improving on and looking shitty on and just totally SUCK all together on probably all night.
Sometimes I ooze with sarcasm.