pissed
Okay so..I'm pissed. I was on the bus on the way home today, hanging out...about 2 lights from my stop, when out of nowhere, at a stop infront of Zippys, I hear a loud bang and crash from the backdoor of the bus. I hear some people mumbling about kids and calling the bus driver, and I assume someone fell on the step or something. Then I look at this white guy in the seat next to the door, and he is holding his head and said "they had brass knuckles too" thne he removes his hand from his head and he has blood on it...then he gets up and you see this big blood spot on the back of his head. I guess some kid punched him in the back of his head and then took off, as one passenger eloquently put it "he ran like he stole something." So I'm concerned for the guy, but I mostly roll my eyes and think, because of my assmptions based on the guy's appearance, mannerisms, and way of talking. (kinda nerdy...but in a "I'm better than you attitude" type of nerdy) Meanwhile he is cupping his head with a paper towel, and some of the guys in the back of the bus get off in search of these kids...along with the bus driver..kinda sketch. They don't find the kids, but they find some cops at 7-11. I guess there are always cops at the Zippys or 7-11 on Fort Weaver, but I guess you can't really complain. So I'm listening to this guy talking, I guess he got on the same bus stop as the kids, but he didn't say anything to him before they got on. (so he says..I know it's one word against another) so anywho, basically he is setting this up as unprovoked attack. Which means he was most likely punched in the back of the head because he is a haole. I heard several of the other people on the bus whispering about it, but not comign right out and saying it, but that is the general assumption. I mean we have all heard about race crimes in Hawaii, and it is far from the norm. I think the was exemplified by the immediate aid and action the majority of the bus passengers provided after the incident, but it happens. So somewhere, between that stop and eventually getting to my bus and hearing everyone whisper the word haole..and even having a few people glance in my direction, that I went from being kinda entertained at this odd situation, to being really pissed. For those who don't know, Haole is the word for white person in Hawaiian slang. It stared from the expression Ha ole...or without breath, which is how the Hawaiians described the first white people they saw, because of their skin color they looked like they were dead. I guess deeper implications of the word Haole, according to an article I read in The Honolulu Advertiser, says it is one who disrupts the natural life flow. So while most people accept it as a slang word, it has a pretty serious connotation, for people to call you somebody who disrupts the natural life flow. But if that is the case, who is the haole in this bus siutation? The guy sitting minding his business, or the punk kid who suckerpunched in the back of the head, and then ran like a child who just took somehting from his Mommy's wallet. I mean really kid you think doing something like this makes you a bigger man, you think it shows your a better person..your a better "race." Damn kid, focus on stuff that matters...show your a better person by perpetuating your culture with dignity despite historic oppression, challenge the stuff that matters... don't add to the hate. Shit like this happens, and you get stupid people saying "oh Hawaiians are like this...or their nasty people because they do this..." stupid shit like this fuels their fire, and makes some of the efforts people are working on that much harder, and the gaps to bridge that much wider.
On a side note, I really hate being called a haole. I have such a respect for Hawaiian culture and history. I have taken time to learn it, and am trying to learn more. I barely drive my car here, I never litter, and I recycle everything I can. I even wear organic sunscreen to limit material in the ocean. I respect this land, the people here (as long as that respect is mutual) and the ocean, and I don't like being told I take away life. I actually recently had the opportunity to watch some really awesome slam poetry at a Leadership conference, by a man named Kealoha. It seems like such a freeing art form, to just shout the word that you feel, but cleverly arranged. I started working on one..I think I will be yelling it into my mirror sooner than a stage...but it is kinda related.
Do I not give life
in my womb, and my breast
you see the red in my cheeks
you see the heave of my chest
You think I can't possibly grasp
I don't understand
the tender eyes of the ocean
the heartbeat of the land
You say it's not in my blood
it doesn't run through my veins
but I feel a rhythm in my pulse
and it echos through my brain
Nurturer, daughter, spirit, mother
friend, lover, sister, giver
these names that I take on
from these my life force flows like a river
so make me different
do what you must
but don't try to take from me
what I feel so freely
so intrinsicly
when you call me
a haole
On a side note, I really hate being called a haole. I have such a respect for Hawaiian culture and history. I have taken time to learn it, and am trying to learn more. I barely drive my car here, I never litter, and I recycle everything I can. I even wear organic sunscreen to limit material in the ocean. I respect this land, the people here (as long as that respect is mutual) and the ocean, and I don't like being told I take away life. I actually recently had the opportunity to watch some really awesome slam poetry at a Leadership conference, by a man named Kealoha. It seems like such a freeing art form, to just shout the word that you feel, but cleverly arranged. I started working on one..I think I will be yelling it into my mirror sooner than a stage...but it is kinda related.
Do I not give life
in my womb, and my breast
you see the red in my cheeks
you see the heave of my chest
You think I can't possibly grasp
I don't understand
the tender eyes of the ocean
the heartbeat of the land
You say it's not in my blood
it doesn't run through my veins
but I feel a rhythm in my pulse
and it echos through my brain
Nurturer, daughter, spirit, mother
friend, lover, sister, giver
these names that I take on
from these my life force flows like a river
so make me different
do what you must
but don't try to take from me
what I feel so freely
so intrinsicly
when you call me
a haole