why?
So...for those of you who don't know, on February 1st, my boyfriend and I were tboned by a drunk 19 year old, who already had one DUI. I don't feel like telling the story, I've told it a thousand times and right now I don't feel like it. All you need to know is, he broke my pelvis. So I can't work, go to school, walk without a walker, or do anyhting without my mom freaking out, until like april.
You'd think I'd be used to it by now, but I can't deal with it. Why do bad things happen to good people? I know I'm not perfect, but I also know that I didn't deserve this. I don't deserve to sit at home and cry because I've lost so much. I lost my freedom, a semester of school, a job (which i hated but it was money) for a few months. And it sucks.
I know, I still have tony, and my friends (whom have all been sooo amazing) and my family,(whom help me greatly every day) but I'm still missing so much. I'm going to be 20 in EXACTLY three weeks, and I really don't have much to look forward to. I'll be spending it with my walker, and with my mom telling me I can only go out for a couple hours because I'll get tired. And dealing with trying to find a good lawyer, and all that jazz.
I know, I'm going to have so much money when it's all over. But it doesn't change the fact that right now I'm miserably too often. And that I am constantly in pain, even though I pretend it's nothing. I have to. When people call to check on me, I can't be like "it sucks, I hurt." no one wants to hear that. I need to be happy so no one worries.
I hate the stupid walker. I hate all the pity, I hate the fact that I fight with tony and it's not his fault. I start it. It's my fault. I get jealous because the accident hasn't affected his life at all. He works, he hangs out with friends, he can drive and do whatever he wants. So I get mad. And it's sooo unfair. I'm terrible.
I got a subpeona. I have to go to court on March 9th, and be a witness for that guy who hit me. I don't want to see him. I don't want to see the kid who has messed up my life, and doesn't care. How can you not care....
I'm sorry. I am. To anyone who has been affected by this...
You'd think I'd be used to it by now, but I can't deal with it. Why do bad things happen to good people? I know I'm not perfect, but I also know that I didn't deserve this. I don't deserve to sit at home and cry because I've lost so much. I lost my freedom, a semester of school, a job (which i hated but it was money) for a few months. And it sucks.
I know, I still have tony, and my friends (whom have all been sooo amazing) and my family,(whom help me greatly every day) but I'm still missing so much. I'm going to be 20 in EXACTLY three weeks, and I really don't have much to look forward to. I'll be spending it with my walker, and with my mom telling me I can only go out for a couple hours because I'll get tired. And dealing with trying to find a good lawyer, and all that jazz.
I know, I'm going to have so much money when it's all over. But it doesn't change the fact that right now I'm miserably too often. And that I am constantly in pain, even though I pretend it's nothing. I have to. When people call to check on me, I can't be like "it sucks, I hurt." no one wants to hear that. I need to be happy so no one worries.
I hate the stupid walker. I hate all the pity, I hate the fact that I fight with tony and it's not his fault. I start it. It's my fault. I get jealous because the accident hasn't affected his life at all. He works, he hangs out with friends, he can drive and do whatever he wants. So I get mad. And it's sooo unfair. I'm terrible.
I got a subpeona. I have to go to court on March 9th, and be a witness for that guy who hit me. I don't want to see him. I don't want to see the kid who has messed up my life, and doesn't care. How can you not care....
I'm sorry. I am. To anyone who has been affected by this...