ugh, GUYS GUYS GUYS
Hey ppl, wut up wut up, haha. Well, today was an ok day until like, tonight i think. i received 2 very disappointing news today =( First, one of the slosests ppl in my life is moving to Cali. This fucking sux ass, blows dick, and fucks.... well, use ur imagination. lol. but no, seriously. I really dont know what the fuck i'm gonna do w/ out this person in my life. i mean, she's still gonna be there, just REALLY REALLY far away ='( Anwyays, the second bad news, well, it's not really bad, at least not for me, i guess. lol. get ready cus ur gonna be as shock as i am.............................................................................. Robbie is gonna be a daddy!!!! yup, that's right, u read right, Robbie is gonna be a father. I couldnt believe that either. WTF was this guys problem? he's really bad right now and he was scaring me to death so i had to make sure he was ok and that's why i called him, we were talking for about an hour. Not only is he gonna be a father but his life basically sux right now, he has Asthma and some other shit, next week he goes in for surgery. He's only 18, what sux even more is that his g/f is only 16. He doesnt wanna go to jail. lol. but anyways, that's what he gets for fucking around, not to be a bitch or anything. AAAAANYWHOM, lol, i also talked to Steven today. I told him that he was toooo fucking confusing, that i didnt even know who the hell he was, i asked him what he wanted from me and he said "everything" wtf does that mean??? then he got mad cus i had to hang up on him, but that's cus i NEEDED to talk to Robbie. He said he was upset cus i wasnt going over to his house this sat. and i dont give a shit, ha. lol. Until he can be himself w/ me and he finds out who he REALLY is, then i MIGHT, just MIGHT consider on going over, but most that likely it wont happen. haha. man, i'm sucgh a bitch, lol j/k. I wrote something about Steven and this is how it goes.......................... "What is it that u want from me? I'm sorry i cant be that person u want me to be. I try my best to make u happy but then again, i guess my best aint good enough. It never was, it never is, and it's never gonna be. Everyone expects so much from me, i dont need to add ur name on the list. U know who i am, how i am, and what i'm all about, why cant u accept me for that? I dont even know who u are. You asked why u were the furdest thing on my mind? what do u want me to do? put u infront of every1 else when i dont know u? Of course ur so far away in my mind, look at the way u act and how u talk to me. I'm sure u wouldnt want a guy like u to be talking to ur lil sister huh? ur my friend and everything, but that' all i see u as, just a friend, i cant see u as nothing more only cus i dont know u!!!!! cus u cant show urself w/ me. Sometimes u just make me so mad and upset. You've seen me cuss the shit outta u and i'm sorry, but then again, u were just so damm disrespectful. According to ur friends, ur the nicest guy in the planet, outgoing, funny, and to tell u the truth, i wanna meet this guy. I've been wondering who's the individual of whom they speak of. They tell me about u and i'm just like "wow, kool, i wanna hang out w/ this person" and then i tell then about u and they say "wtf dude, why do u talk to an ass like that, stop talking to him" Then i get the shock of my life, they say it's u, but how, no way. To me ur the perfect example of an oximoron. Yes, i understand that every1 has a good side and a bad side, but to u and ur friends, ur bad side might actually be ur good side and to me, well.... ur bad side is just ur bad side. We've shared interesting conversations together, laughs, and even tears. That's the guy i wanna meet, the guy i wanna talk to. Not the guy that seems like if the only think in his mind is sex. So what if ur dad is like the worst husband ever or if ur brother leaves his g/f's as soon as they fall in love w/ him? You dont have to be like that, u can be ur own person and have ur own personality. You say i play games.. well, it's really u. You confuse the fuck out of me. Do u want me to be ur g/f, ur friend, what? Stop going around the bush and be straight up w/ me. I need ur honesty. I like talking to u, i really do, but i'm afraid that one of these days, it's gonna come to a point where i'm gonna say "until u find out who u r, u can give me a call and i'll be here" I cant figure it out for u, ur gonna have to do it on ur own, and u know what? i guess that day is already here so..... until u find out who u truly are, then u can give me a call and tell me it's ok."..................... so what do u think? messed up huh? but that's how i feel about him, i have noooo clue of what goes on in his mind. But anyways, i guess that's it for today, sorry this was like super long. buh bye guys and take care, tooddles.
~Campanita~