(no subject)
every time the 17th comes and goes I cry... the day of our anniversary... why do I continue to care... why do I feel so much pain... why is it that I can't seem to forget our love...
why is it still so hard to let people in...
I just want someone to comfort me, please... I don't feel whole anymore. I thought I was fine being myself, being alone, but I'm really not. I'm so very unstable, but no one would ever know because I hide behind sarcasm and laughter. But deep down I'm dying inside. Crying. Hoping. Maybe one day someone will save me. I just wish it could be you, but I know I will never get that lucky.
If you would have heard the things I wanted to say, I might have been okay with being single. Just the fact that you never heard me, is what's been killing me lately. I wish you could just hear what I've been trying to tell you all along. I'm so lost without you and even after so long I don't know why I let myself think of you, but every time I hear your voice I get nervous, axious, hopeful and depressed all in the same conversation. I'm nervous I'll never get to be close to you again, I'm anxious for the next time I see you, hopeful that maybe you will see me in a different light, and depressed because I know you are happy being free.
why is it still so hard to let people in...
I just want someone to comfort me, please... I don't feel whole anymore. I thought I was fine being myself, being alone, but I'm really not. I'm so very unstable, but no one would ever know because I hide behind sarcasm and laughter. But deep down I'm dying inside. Crying. Hoping. Maybe one day someone will save me. I just wish it could be you, but I know I will never get that lucky.
If you would have heard the things I wanted to say, I might have been okay with being single. Just the fact that you never heard me, is what's been killing me lately. I wish you could just hear what I've been trying to tell you all along. I'm so lost without you and even after so long I don't know why I let myself think of you, but every time I hear your voice I get nervous, axious, hopeful and depressed all in the same conversation. I'm nervous I'll never get to be close to you again, I'm anxious for the next time I see you, hopeful that maybe you will see me in a different light, and depressed because I know you are happy being free.