the subject just came to me
ok, i wasn't sure what to write about, but it seemed to have jumped right into my lap persay. ok, so this girl and i ( i know girls agian, but that's high school life, bah, i hate drama.) we flirted a lot at this camp i went to, but i never really decided what i wanted to do with that. She's also almost my neighbor, we'd just never hung out much before. so now we come home and we've hung out much more, normally with friends. anyway, so the signs of she likes me are like neon in my face. no joke, its like readin a book. but i dunno if i like her, so i been playin this little game. where i get kinda close, then feel to close, so back off, but not to much. know what i mean. like kinda push here away, but don outright say no, just casually avoid talkin to her. cause i don know where i'm at, but i don wanna start sometin just to hate it and reject this chick. then hurt her real bad and lose a good friend. plus she's my neighbor almost so avoiding her is hard and if we hated each other, it would suck. So can't do that. yet, not sure, really not sure if i even wanna get in on a relationship. the real problem is, sometimes we got stuff to talk about, but lots of times we don't. and she keeps havin things in common with me, and part of me is goin cool, but the other part is goin, crap this isn't good, more reasons. cause some days, i'm like ok this could work, but other times i'm goin i can't deal with a relationship now. shoot i leave next week for 2 weeks. how would that work, lets go out, but i'm leavin, so don't find some other guy or anything. or bye i'm leavin hope i don find some super perfect chick while i'm gone. so how would that work. mainly sometimes its just so awkward with us. like i don feel that immdeiate connection. maybe the awkwardness is contributed to the fact that she likes me and is rather shy, and i'm kinda liken her to. reguardless, i mostly don feel the connection. maybe i havn't given it a chance, maybe its cause i'm still tryin to hold on to my last relationship, maybe there's notin there anyway. so tonight she slyly tells me to look at her pro, not quite sure what to expect i look and find this:
have you ever wanted something so bad...
except its locked in a glass room...
where you can see what you want...
only you dont have the key to get in....
thats how i feel about you....
firstly, not even sure how to respond, so i told her i would have to get back to her on it. cause this is the deal. i gotta either totally avoid her for say 3 days, or figure out some kinda answer, or somtin. cause i dunno what to do. do i say why not, and just try it, you know, or say i got issues to work out, lets get to know each other more first. i dunno, just don. and more i think about it, more i'm blamin myself for not lettin go of this last relationship, so who knows. cause i can't get this other girl outa my head, havn't seen her all summer and can't. so what do i do, just dunno. gonna atleast let this sit a day or so, possible ask some advice, proably be back here talkin it out with myself tom nite. but sleep looks good, so i'm out.
have you ever wanted something so bad...
except its locked in a glass room...
where you can see what you want...
only you dont have the key to get in....
thats how i feel about you....
firstly, not even sure how to respond, so i told her i would have to get back to her on it. cause this is the deal. i gotta either totally avoid her for say 3 days, or figure out some kinda answer, or somtin. cause i dunno what to do. do i say why not, and just try it, you know, or say i got issues to work out, lets get to know each other more first. i dunno, just don. and more i think about it, more i'm blamin myself for not lettin go of this last relationship, so who knows. cause i can't get this other girl outa my head, havn't seen her all summer and can't. so what do i do, just dunno. gonna atleast let this sit a day or so, possible ask some advice, proably be back here talkin it out with myself tom nite. but sleep looks good, so i'm out.