Words cannot describe...
It seems I only post to LJ when I have something to complain about. So I apologize in advance for that. But really, it's usually the things that make you really angry or sad or (in rare cases) happy that you feel the need to rant about, isn't it? Anyways, here goes.
There is nothing that makes me more angry than when people insult my intelligence. That being said, my english professor is driving me up the wall. I wrote him an e-mail today asking a question about an assignment. I had read the assignment several times, read the e-mail he sent out clarifying the assignment, and I was still confused about it. The theme of our class is "Figuring Freedom in American Literature and American Culture" so this assignment is for us to single out passages from the readings that contain the word "freedom" and explain the meaning they take on in that specific piece. Now, of course, not every single reading he gives us is going to contain the word freedom, so I wanted to clarify if he wanted us to do entries only on those readings that contain the word "freedom" specifically or look for the generic theme of freedom in each piece. This was his response.
"Reread the assignment carefully. You will find the answer there. If you still have questions, ask them in class on Tuesday."
To me, I read that and think 1. He assumes I am too lazy to actually read the assignment before asking a question or 2. I am too stupid to pick up on the obvious answer. Maybe that's just me over-reacting, but that's the way I feel. And then in the meantime, I'm not sure what sort of response writing that he wants for Tuesday. I am bogged down with work (in addition to being sick and generally lacking in academic capacity right now) and I don't have time to waste writing up entries that I didn't need to do in the first place. I can understand that he is a little fed up with our class, since many of them don't do the reading (or in some cases haven't even bought the books yet) and he doesn't want to have to keep repeating himself, but maybe if everyone is having questions about your stupid assignment, perhaps it wasn't that clear to begin with? I have done the reading every day, I do the stupid busy-work responses, I pay attention in class, and I also talk during class (which is big for me, considering how I much I talk to begin with) so to then be treated like I'm some sort of slacker idiotic freshman with no capability for critical thinking really pisses me off. It's like, you're what, 6 years older than me? I hate condescending people!
In general, non-angry news, things are okay. None of my classes really appeal to me this semester, which is a shame. I even have cool professors who know me and like me, but I still am very so-so about everything. Lack of caring equals lack of motivation to do work, which ends up with me trying to do a week's worth of readings on Sunday night most of the time. Work is okay, but it scares me how much I hate being there sometimes. I've been pretty bummed lately too. Maybe it's the whole "everything is changing/everything is staying the same" dichotomy which has plagued me my whole life. School is especially depressing because pretty much all of the art history people I knew have graduated, and the life has just left the department. I wish I knew where I was going with school. I wish I had school friends. I wish I would stop wishing about things and be proactive about my life.
Why can I not write an entry without moping about something? Things aren't horrible. I've been going to Curves every week, and while I don't think I'm making much progress in the losing weight department, it is fun to have something that my mom and I can share. I also saw Brick with Elaine this weekend, and it was quite possibly the coolest movie I have seen in a while. And I do actually have some fun people in my classes to talk to, so it's nice to have that connection (they will be graduating soon too, of course). And also, and this is my big news, I will be getting a cell phone in the very near future!
So, that is what has been going on with me in the past couple weeks. School, work, and more school.
There is nothing that makes me more angry than when people insult my intelligence. That being said, my english professor is driving me up the wall. I wrote him an e-mail today asking a question about an assignment. I had read the assignment several times, read the e-mail he sent out clarifying the assignment, and I was still confused about it. The theme of our class is "Figuring Freedom in American Literature and American Culture" so this assignment is for us to single out passages from the readings that contain the word "freedom" and explain the meaning they take on in that specific piece. Now, of course, not every single reading he gives us is going to contain the word freedom, so I wanted to clarify if he wanted us to do entries only on those readings that contain the word "freedom" specifically or look for the generic theme of freedom in each piece. This was his response.
"Reread the assignment carefully. You will find the answer there. If you still have questions, ask them in class on Tuesday."
To me, I read that and think 1. He assumes I am too lazy to actually read the assignment before asking a question or 2. I am too stupid to pick up on the obvious answer. Maybe that's just me over-reacting, but that's the way I feel. And then in the meantime, I'm not sure what sort of response writing that he wants for Tuesday. I am bogged down with work (in addition to being sick and generally lacking in academic capacity right now) and I don't have time to waste writing up entries that I didn't need to do in the first place. I can understand that he is a little fed up with our class, since many of them don't do the reading (or in some cases haven't even bought the books yet) and he doesn't want to have to keep repeating himself, but maybe if everyone is having questions about your stupid assignment, perhaps it wasn't that clear to begin with? I have done the reading every day, I do the stupid busy-work responses, I pay attention in class, and I also talk during class (which is big for me, considering how I much I talk to begin with) so to then be treated like I'm some sort of slacker idiotic freshman with no capability for critical thinking really pisses me off. It's like, you're what, 6 years older than me? I hate condescending people!
In general, non-angry news, things are okay. None of my classes really appeal to me this semester, which is a shame. I even have cool professors who know me and like me, but I still am very so-so about everything. Lack of caring equals lack of motivation to do work, which ends up with me trying to do a week's worth of readings on Sunday night most of the time. Work is okay, but it scares me how much I hate being there sometimes. I've been pretty bummed lately too. Maybe it's the whole "everything is changing/everything is staying the same" dichotomy which has plagued me my whole life. School is especially depressing because pretty much all of the art history people I knew have graduated, and the life has just left the department. I wish I knew where I was going with school. I wish I had school friends. I wish I would stop wishing about things and be proactive about my life.
Why can I not write an entry without moping about something? Things aren't horrible. I've been going to Curves every week, and while I don't think I'm making much progress in the losing weight department, it is fun to have something that my mom and I can share. I also saw Brick with Elaine this weekend, and it was quite possibly the coolest movie I have seen in a while. And I do actually have some fun people in my classes to talk to, so it's nice to have that connection (they will be graduating soon too, of course). And also, and this is my big news, I will be getting a cell phone in the very near future!
So, that is what has been going on with me in the past couple weeks. School, work, and more school.