applogy
the past few days ive learned so much its nearly ridiculous...i think ive possibly learned more the past few days than i have in my entire life and i feel so enlightened about it...almost as if what i learned is going to affect my life in the best possible way ever....i realized exactly how disguesting self pity is...once you start its like a vicious cycle thats hard to get out of and you get consumed by yourself and your thoughts and its just totally not cool...i pityed myself for over a month and nothing came of it but more self pity, pain and hatred...the truth is i just got a nice smack of reality...the fact that everything isnt going to always be perfect and everything isn't always going to be happy and that you cant always get what you want and that there may not always be a "why"...thats seriously what life is...acceptance of it is another story, but now at least i understand life a little better and am going to try and appreciate and cherish the small things so much more. also id just like to appologize to everyone ive been mean, either just by talking nasty or but not returning fone calls and what not, ill be sure to make it up to u all...<3 lots of lots of love to all...and everyone smile because you are blessed in some beautiful way :)