(no subject)
This past weekend Jeff's mom came down to visit.
Angie Bryant is the craziest fucking woman I've met in my entire life. Jeff literally hates his mom. He told me I didn't have to worry about making a good impression her because she didn't matter. Bad, bad history.
Anyway, I'll just give an example of something she did this weekend that may explain a bit about her.
In one of the girls bathroom on our floor, someone had left a Bath & Bodyworks hand soap called Moon Lit Path. Apparently it's her favorite, so she made me go wash my hands. I go put a squirt on and continue my hand washing routine. She insists that one squirt won't be enough and follows through to put four more unneeded squirts. During all of this, talking about anything and everything she can pull out of her ass, like my grandma Norstrud, but one million times worse. We get back to Jeff's room and she has me make all of the guys in there smell my hands. (This included as Hood as one of the guys, who clearly cares more about photosynthesis than he does about the scent of my hands. Dear god, that man is sexy.)
Jeff's mom goes into his neighbors room, across the hall. Now, this guy keeps to himself, doesn't ever say anything, very quiet. Here he was, minding his own business until some strange lady barges into his room, asking him a 20 questions a minutes and yes, insisting that he smells her hands. She went into his room like five or six times to invite him to Jeff's. He eagerly denied the offer, but who could blame him?
She was also certain that Jeff's Pink Floyd poster of the girls with their backs painted, showing their butts, was pornographic. So while Jeff and I went to have a cigarette, she took it down and put it in his closet. When we got back and Jeff noticed, it was the last straw. I could tell he was trying really hard to have patience with her, because like he always says "She's like and eight-year-old." Jeff got so mad, he was trying his best not to yell.
I wish everyone could understand how crazy this woman is, but I'm sure no one really wants to read everything this woman put us through this weekend. It never stopped.
Cigarette time with Joe. Buh-bye.
Angie Bryant is the craziest fucking woman I've met in my entire life. Jeff literally hates his mom. He told me I didn't have to worry about making a good impression her because she didn't matter. Bad, bad history.
Anyway, I'll just give an example of something she did this weekend that may explain a bit about her.
In one of the girls bathroom on our floor, someone had left a Bath & Bodyworks hand soap called Moon Lit Path. Apparently it's her favorite, so she made me go wash my hands. I go put a squirt on and continue my hand washing routine. She insists that one squirt won't be enough and follows through to put four more unneeded squirts. During all of this, talking about anything and everything she can pull out of her ass, like my grandma Norstrud, but one million times worse. We get back to Jeff's room and she has me make all of the guys in there smell my hands. (This included as Hood as one of the guys, who clearly cares more about photosynthesis than he does about the scent of my hands. Dear god, that man is sexy.)
Jeff's mom goes into his neighbors room, across the hall. Now, this guy keeps to himself, doesn't ever say anything, very quiet. Here he was, minding his own business until some strange lady barges into his room, asking him a 20 questions a minutes and yes, insisting that he smells her hands. She went into his room like five or six times to invite him to Jeff's. He eagerly denied the offer, but who could blame him?
She was also certain that Jeff's Pink Floyd poster of the girls with their backs painted, showing their butts, was pornographic. So while Jeff and I went to have a cigarette, she took it down and put it in his closet. When we got back and Jeff noticed, it was the last straw. I could tell he was trying really hard to have patience with her, because like he always says "She's like and eight-year-old." Jeff got so mad, he was trying his best not to yell.
I wish everyone could understand how crazy this woman is, but I'm sure no one really wants to read everything this woman put us through this weekend. It never stopped.
Cigarette time with Joe. Buh-bye.