a little exercise.
why do my secrets always hurt so much as they leave my mouth? i swear, they're covered in razorblades that stick up like the hair on a threatened cat. when i vomit them, i can just feel my throat churning. and being mangled. unrecognisably mangled. In my dreams i've always found that secrets are something that need not be shared, but in real life i've found that secrets are the only things people want to hear. but who knows? maybe they just want my throat to bleed. maybe i like coughing up blood. maybe i just feel guilty for all the things i wanted to keep to myself. selfish secrets.
what about water? will it heal me? can it save me? can i trust it to? i've heard of people drowning. being held under until the breathing is all their minds can focus on. until the fact that they are machines is the only thing present in their heads. machines that do not run on water. i hear if you fill your gas tank with water, the same thing happens. can't be a coincidence. just can't. but people say it will heal me! i've been told that if i just wade out into the water, everything will be fine! balance i suppose. wade out; don't jump in. don't let the current get you. you step out and step out and step out, until the shelf underneath you gives way and your lungs feel the sting of salt. it burns up and down your throat, and eventually you just give in and accept.
goodnight.
...i meant for these not to get dark. sorry.
what about water? will it heal me? can it save me? can i trust it to? i've heard of people drowning. being held under until the breathing is all their minds can focus on. until the fact that they are machines is the only thing present in their heads. machines that do not run on water. i hear if you fill your gas tank with water, the same thing happens. can't be a coincidence. just can't. but people say it will heal me! i've been told that if i just wade out into the water, everything will be fine! balance i suppose. wade out; don't jump in. don't let the current get you. you step out and step out and step out, until the shelf underneath you gives way and your lungs feel the sting of salt. it burns up and down your throat, and eventually you just give in and accept.
goodnight.
...i meant for these not to get dark. sorry.