heathrow ain't ready for my jelly....
Captain's log: Last nite 1:30 am
My last nite in London and insomnia strikes again. It is 1:30 am and i am amusing myself by watching a Russian "Court TV" program on one of the international channels my hotel gets. It is Hi-LARIOUS. Picture Judge Judy in Russian. Although i can understand very little of what is being said, i think i have a good grasp of what is happening. Apparently a young russian man with a perm and a 'Gadzooks' style patterned shirt is being tried for beating someone to death. To testify on his behalf are his weeping mother, a prostitute, a high school friend, and a bouncer from a discotheque. Of course, all of this makes perfect sense, if you are Russian. It also makes perfect sense to show a murder case on Court TV. VIVA PYCCNR!!! I talked to Cat on the phone about it. She thinks it may be an old Soviet case they are just getting around to...
So here i am. My flight is a little later than i thought, so i am biding my time at the internet cafe. I had to buy a backpack to help fit everything i intend to bring home. It will be a goddamn miracle if i make it to the airport. It will also be a goddamn miracle if i get home with anything but suitcases full of broken souviniers and hairspray-coated clothes. In total, i now have 3 huge bags stuffed to the brim, plus my purse to haul through London. 2 tube stops. All those stairs. Just making it down the 3 flights in my hotel was a monumental task that took 10 minutes of sweating and groaning. What i wouldn't give to have my future husband with me (Griff this means you). :) Or at the very least a monkey butler. Oh god, what i wouldn't give for a chimp in a bowtie right now. It seems only fair that if we are forced to live and breathe on this planet we are each given our own private monkey butler. I don't who could make this happen, but rest assured i will be on the phone with them, within minutes of my return.
However, i did get a signal from above to keep going. To not let this final leg of my journey destroy me. As soon as i got to my hotel lobby, panting and thinking that this was entirely impossible, what was playing on the lobby tv? THE BOOTYLICIOUS VIDEO! There were Stevie Nicks and Beyonce shaking there jelly, as if to tell me "keep going, girl, this is just a test of your Bootyliciousness!" I straightened up my posture, and decided, yes this is a test, and i will pass!!!
My last nite in London and insomnia strikes again. It is 1:30 am and i am amusing myself by watching a Russian "Court TV" program on one of the international channels my hotel gets. It is Hi-LARIOUS. Picture Judge Judy in Russian. Although i can understand very little of what is being said, i think i have a good grasp of what is happening. Apparently a young russian man with a perm and a 'Gadzooks' style patterned shirt is being tried for beating someone to death. To testify on his behalf are his weeping mother, a prostitute, a high school friend, and a bouncer from a discotheque. Of course, all of this makes perfect sense, if you are Russian. It also makes perfect sense to show a murder case on Court TV. VIVA PYCCNR!!! I talked to Cat on the phone about it. She thinks it may be an old Soviet case they are just getting around to...
So here i am. My flight is a little later than i thought, so i am biding my time at the internet cafe. I had to buy a backpack to help fit everything i intend to bring home. It will be a goddamn miracle if i make it to the airport. It will also be a goddamn miracle if i get home with anything but suitcases full of broken souviniers and hairspray-coated clothes. In total, i now have 3 huge bags stuffed to the brim, plus my purse to haul through London. 2 tube stops. All those stairs. Just making it down the 3 flights in my hotel was a monumental task that took 10 minutes of sweating and groaning. What i wouldn't give to have my future husband with me (Griff this means you). :) Or at the very least a monkey butler. Oh god, what i wouldn't give for a chimp in a bowtie right now. It seems only fair that if we are forced to live and breathe on this planet we are each given our own private monkey butler. I don't who could make this happen, but rest assured i will be on the phone with them, within minutes of my return.
However, i did get a signal from above to keep going. To not let this final leg of my journey destroy me. As soon as i got to my hotel lobby, panting and thinking that this was entirely impossible, what was playing on the lobby tv? THE BOOTYLICIOUS VIDEO! There were Stevie Nicks and Beyonce shaking there jelly, as if to tell me "keep going, girl, this is just a test of your Bootyliciousness!" I straightened up my posture, and decided, yes this is a test, and i will pass!!!