SHIELD Tricarrier, Somewhere above Cleveland, Wednesday afternoon
Jessica had waited all morning. She waited as the Tricarrier moved a few states. She waited as she found at that the closest thing to a change of clothes she had available was a jacket. She waited as the Ultimates gathered for lunch around their big meeting table.
"Am I fired?" she asked, finished with waiting as she walked into the conference room.
"Fired from what, Spider-Woman?" Captain America asked. Sure, he was out of uniform. He probably would have liked to be called Steve. He was still Captain America.
"From this," Jessica said. "Director Chang knows what I'm talking about."
"Did you steal something?" Tony Stark asked, paying far more attention to his noodles than he was to the conversation.
Chang sighed. "Our dear friend Jessica Drew here took it upon herself to team up with a gaggle of off-the-books teenage super hero wannabes and broke into the Roxxon Manhattan headquarters and smacked some folks around. Including Phillip R. Roxxon himself."
"And got him to confess to years of illegal genetic experiments," Jessica pointed out.
"What kind of genetic experiments?" Tony asked, finally looking intrigued.
"Well, me, for one," Jessica said. "Also, those kids in the paper, Cloak and Dagger. And there's more. There is an actual list. A list!"
"How long has this been going on?" Tony asked.
But Cap had a more important question. "You're a genetic experiment?"
"How do you think I got spider powers, Captain?" Jessica asked.
"You were... bit by a spider?" Cap tried.
"You don't know that I'm the illegal genetic clone of Peter Parker, the original Spider-Man?" Jessica asked, sounding confused.
There was an awkward silence.
"How would I know that?" Cap asked.
"That was classified information, Agent Drew," Chang said, face meeting palm.
"Why was it classified to him?" Jessica asked. "He's Captain America."
"You're Peter Parker?" Tony asked.
"I'm not. I was built from his genetic codes," Jessica explained. She hadn't told anyone this since she told Peter this years ago. Why did she find herself explaining it to everyone all of a sudden? "I'm my own person. And I have lady parts."
Tony rested his chin on his hands for a moment as he pondered that. And then, suddenly, he was slapping the table with both hands. "That is fascinating!"
"It's also an affront to science," Jessica pointed out.
"It can be both," Tony argued immediately.
With a sigh, Jessica turned back to Director Chang. "Am I being kicked off the ship or not?"
"We'll discuss it later, Agent Drew," Chang said, pushing the rest of her lunch away.
"She caught a bad person doing bad things," Cap argued. "What's left to discuss?"
"SHIELD has defense contracts with Roxxon," Chang explained. "She made a complicated situation more complicated."
"You lay down with monsters?" Thor asked. He was on his fourth box of noodles and his mouth was full.
"Not me, Thor," Chang said. "Remember, I inherited a lot of this from your buddy Nick Fury."
"Are you saying Nick Fury was in business with less than--"
"Of course he was," Hawkeye interrupted. He was on his second box of noodles. "Grow up."
"I think there needs to be a full investigation into Roxxon and this list of surviving genetic experiments," Jessica said, taking control of the conversation again. "I think it needs to get underway immediately and I would like to lead that investigation."
"Two seconds ago you thought you were fired," Chang pointed out. "And now you want to lead the investigation?"
"I'm going to do an investigation whether you fire me or not, so...." Jessica explained.
"That's the stuff," Cap said.
Jessica had never felt prouder. "Thank you."
"You're seventeen years old!!" Chang shouted.
"I want to make sure that Roxxon is held fully accountable for everything he's done," Jessica said.
"As do I," Tony agreed. At some point during the bickering, he'd pulled up a holographic version of today's Daily Bugle and was reading through the article: SUPER TEEN CORPORATE TAKEDOWN!
"He's freaking Norman Osborn times ten!" Jessica argued.
"I'm formulating a plan and talking to advisors. I will keep you posted," Chang said. "Maybe."
Tony perked up at the article for a second. "Says here you're teamed up with the new Spider-Man."
"Yes," Jessica confirmed.
"You got him back in the costume."
"Yes."
"He's back?" Cap asked. "How did he do?"
"Honestly?" Jessica said. "He's amazing."
[OOC: Adapted from Cataclysm: Ultimate Spider-Man #1 by Brian Michael Bendis and David Marquez. This is the last canon catchup post for at least a couple weeks, I promise! I still need to rewrite Cataclysm, after all. Sigh.]
"Am I fired?" she asked, finished with waiting as she walked into the conference room.
"Fired from what, Spider-Woman?" Captain America asked. Sure, he was out of uniform. He probably would have liked to be called Steve. He was still Captain America.
"From this," Jessica said. "Director Chang knows what I'm talking about."
"Did you steal something?" Tony Stark asked, paying far more attention to his noodles than he was to the conversation.
Chang sighed. "Our dear friend Jessica Drew here took it upon herself to team up with a gaggle of off-the-books teenage super hero wannabes and broke into the Roxxon Manhattan headquarters and smacked some folks around. Including Phillip R. Roxxon himself."
"And got him to confess to years of illegal genetic experiments," Jessica pointed out.
"What kind of genetic experiments?" Tony asked, finally looking intrigued.
"Well, me, for one," Jessica said. "Also, those kids in the paper, Cloak and Dagger. And there's more. There is an actual list. A list!"
"How long has this been going on?" Tony asked.
But Cap had a more important question. "You're a genetic experiment?"
"How do you think I got spider powers, Captain?" Jessica asked.
"You were... bit by a spider?" Cap tried.
"You don't know that I'm the illegal genetic clone of Peter Parker, the original Spider-Man?" Jessica asked, sounding confused.
There was an awkward silence.
"How would I know that?" Cap asked.
"That was classified information, Agent Drew," Chang said, face meeting palm.
"Why was it classified to him?" Jessica asked. "He's Captain America."
"You're Peter Parker?" Tony asked.
"I'm not. I was built from his genetic codes," Jessica explained. She hadn't told anyone this since she told Peter this years ago. Why did she find herself explaining it to everyone all of a sudden? "I'm my own person. And I have lady parts."
Tony rested his chin on his hands for a moment as he pondered that. And then, suddenly, he was slapping the table with both hands. "That is fascinating!"
"It's also an affront to science," Jessica pointed out.
"It can be both," Tony argued immediately.
With a sigh, Jessica turned back to Director Chang. "Am I being kicked off the ship or not?"
"We'll discuss it later, Agent Drew," Chang said, pushing the rest of her lunch away.
"She caught a bad person doing bad things," Cap argued. "What's left to discuss?"
"SHIELD has defense contracts with Roxxon," Chang explained. "She made a complicated situation more complicated."
"You lay down with monsters?" Thor asked. He was on his fourth box of noodles and his mouth was full.
"Not me, Thor," Chang said. "Remember, I inherited a lot of this from your buddy Nick Fury."
"Are you saying Nick Fury was in business with less than--"
"Of course he was," Hawkeye interrupted. He was on his second box of noodles. "Grow up."
"I think there needs to be a full investigation into Roxxon and this list of surviving genetic experiments," Jessica said, taking control of the conversation again. "I think it needs to get underway immediately and I would like to lead that investigation."
"Two seconds ago you thought you were fired," Chang pointed out. "And now you want to lead the investigation?"
"I'm going to do an investigation whether you fire me or not, so...." Jessica explained.
"That's the stuff," Cap said.
Jessica had never felt prouder. "Thank you."
"You're seventeen years old!!" Chang shouted.
"I want to make sure that Roxxon is held fully accountable for everything he's done," Jessica said.
"As do I," Tony agreed. At some point during the bickering, he'd pulled up a holographic version of today's Daily Bugle and was reading through the article: SUPER TEEN CORPORATE TAKEDOWN!
"He's freaking Norman Osborn times ten!" Jessica argued.
"I'm formulating a plan and talking to advisors. I will keep you posted," Chang said. "Maybe."
Tony perked up at the article for a second. "Says here you're teamed up with the new Spider-Man."
"Yes," Jessica confirmed.
"You got him back in the costume."
"Yes."
"He's back?" Cap asked. "How did he do?"
"Honestly?" Jessica said. "He's amazing."
[OOC: Adapted from Cataclysm: Ultimate Spider-Man #1 by Brian Michael Bendis and David Marquez. This is the last canon catchup post for at least a couple weeks, I promise! I still need to rewrite Cataclysm, after all. Sigh.]