(no subject)
everything happens for a reason right? i dont know but it fucken sucks. cos so many things are bullshit and fucked up and you wonder why its like that.what you did to make it like this.what fucking block did u take down to cause this domino effect.what the fuck.i like to say fuck.fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.its not a nice word i shouldnt cuss but fuck it. last night oscar said fuck 3 times withen one little phrase.i talk to myself now.alot.i write some it down now but my mind moves faster then i write.so im watching thr 25th hour its bad.edward norton just said "fuck this" to everything.hes bad.see the movie.that whole sequence makes the movie.today i wrote alot in my book.i watched alot of people.i keep realizing things.my jealousy grows huger over this one little thing.its not that little if its bothering me this much.i think im turning into a loner.i mean i hang with the guys but its not the same.my mom was telling me about home school next year.it sounds like a good idea.ill just stay away and stay away.i really miss the girls.we used to be so fucken tight we'd always be together we were one now its all shitty and stupid.everyone departed.i keep saying it but i lost her.i really did.its all my fault im an idiot.fuck.i didnt want it this way i didnt.all those years seem like it doesnt mean shit now.it hurts.so on another note.i have about 4 disposable camras i gottta develope.i took alot of random weird cool stupid lame pictures.i think my best friend is my journal.it knows everything.i write anything and everything i can in it.its my soul for the time being.ugh im tired of trying with people though.like trying to talk to people and shit.whats the point? nothing matters its like i get so caught up in other peoples lives somehow i try to help people or i have drama or some stupid shit.and i hate it.theres so much aqwardness.ughhhh.i hope everything ends soon.or i just get grounded for ever so then i will have an exuse to stay home and not want to go out. moral of the story fuck