(no subject)
Ramjet and Dirge meet up on Earth before reporting to base
Dirge: *slugs in the shoulder* :|
Ramjet:: *snort* You call that a hit? I barely felt that!
Dirge: Here. This might be better. *SHOOTS IN THE SLAGGING ARM WITH A NULLRAY*
Ramjet:: D< WELL WHAT THE SLAG DID YOU DO THAT FOR? *swipes at with his ONE WORKING ARM*
Dirge: *Punch!* You insulted my punch! D<
Ramjet:: D< I'll have you thrown in a cell for insubordination!
Dirge: You and what army, slagger?
Ramjet:: Me and myself! *jumps at with the intent to tackle him into the ground!*
Dirge: ...*takes off*
Ramjet:: D< COME BACK HERE, FRAGGER! *tries to transform, but seeing as one arm ISN'T WORKING, he can't!*
Dirge: *circles lazily* You lose, boss.
Ramjet:: I never lose! *hey, just because one arm isn't working doesn't mean the other one is dead, too! He fires his own null-ray at *
Dirge: *AGH! Hit in the fragging nose cone of all places. Tumbles out of the sky with a horrible crash*
Ramjet:: *snickers*
Dirge: Hate...you...
Dirge: *twitches*
Ramjet:: Hate you too. *walks over to . Nudges him none-too-gently with his foot*
Dirge: Slagger.
Ramjet:: >]! *victory is mine!*
Dirge: I...will...get you....*twitching*
Ramjet:: Yeah, that'll be the day. *sits down nearby*
Dirge: I...am...! I strike...terror!
Ramjet:: Oh yeah. I'm scared to my spark. *idly cleans his claws*
Dirge:...*kicks*
Ramjet: You just going to twitch me to death or what? You're as pathetic as they come, Dirge.
Dirge: *Starts standing up through SHEER FORCE OF BLOODY MINDED WILL!*
Ramjet: *Huh. Also stands.*
Dirge: *Socks in the optic* D<
Ramjet: SLAGGING PITS! *knocked onto his aft!* YOU PUNCHED OUT MY OPTIC!
Dirge: That's what you get!
Dirge: ....
Dirge: SLAG! Now you're asymmetrical!
Ramjet:: NO!
Ramjet: *tries to scramble away from his certainly insane wingmate*
Dirge: *twitches. Must...resist...urge...*
Dirge: We need to put it back in or punch the other one out. :|
Dirge: Right now.
Ramjet: *covers his punched-in optic with his hand* What do you think? >{
Dirge: Punching the other one would be easier.
Ramjet: But then I'd be blind.
Dirge: But you'd be symmetrical!
Ramjet: If I get this optic fixed, I'll be symmetrical again anyway. *edging away*
Dirge: But if I punched you, you'd be symmetrical now.
Ramjet: You punch me again, I will tear your arm off.
Dirge: You can't rip off my arm if you can't see me, though...*seriously considering his options, Ramjet, stop being an idiot. :|*
Dirge: *Armtwitch*
Ramjet:: *stomps forward* I will try to make it as painful as possible. *grin*
Dirge: ... *Opticpunch*
Ramjet:: FRAGGER! *lunges for . Totally misses*
Dirge: *Relaxes, letting out a sigh* That's much better!
Ramjet:: *stumbling around* COME HERE, YOU NEUROTIC LITTLE GLITCH!
Dirge: *Takes off and hovers* I'll stay where I am, thanks. Why don't you go find a medic and we can
talk when you've calmed down?
Ramjet:: D< How can I find a medic when I can't fragging see?! *and when is he ever calm?*
Dirge: You have a comm system. Use it. *Yeah, is gonna end up without both arms, he's pretty sure. But at least it won't be asymmetrical.*
Ramjet:: ... *tries* They aren't answering D<. *tries to figure out where is so he can shoot him down again*
Dirge: *Very quiet*
Ramjet:: *attempts to push one optic back in. Fails.* Get down here and fix my optics or I'll shoot you down! *pewpewpew!*
Dirge: *Zips to one side* Are you crazy? I'm not a medic! Besides, I'd get energon on me.
Ramjet:: *how'd he get stuck with such pathetic wingmates?* You broke them, you fix them! *pewpewpew!*
Dirge: *Not even close to being hit* Go find someone else. :|
Ramjet:: No! *hmm...heat-seeking missiles...*
Dirge: *Oh shi--! BOOM!*
Dirge: *crunch*
Dirge: *Paiiiin.*
Ramjet:: Finally. Now get over here.
Dirge: My leg is missing!
Dirge: ...I think it's over by that sand dune.
Ramjet:: Worry about that later. Drag yourself over here and fix my fragging optics already!
Dirge: My leg! *Dragging himself over towards his leg*
Ramjet:: *listening* Where are you going, you worthless pile of scrap? *carefully tries to walk toward , hoping he doesn't trip on anything*
Dirge: *scrape-drag. Scrape-drag* I need my leg!
Ramjet:: I need my optics! *stumble-stomp*
Dirge: My leeeeg! *DD8*
Ramjet:: MY optics! >[
Dirge: *Grabs his leg and starts trying to put it back on :<*
Ramjet:: What do you think you're doing?!
Dirge: Fixing myself, you slagging moron.
Ramjet:: You're supposed to fix me first! D< *oh he's mad now!*
Dirge: Shut up!
Ramjet:: Optics are more important than legs! Frag, I'm more important than you, therefore I should be repaired first!
Dirge: Shut up! Idiot... *mutters as he reattaches his leg as best he can*
Ramjet:: You're the idiot, you shut up!
Dirge:: No, YOU shut up! Slagging moron!
Ramjet: *takes a swipe at where he thinks Dirge is* Don't call me stupid! I can crush you!
Dirge: *Is in fact several feet in the oppoisite direction* If you could see, maybe!
Ramjet: *snarl* And whose fault is it that I can't see? Incompetent glitch-whore...
Dirge: Hey! Hey!
Dirge: I am not a whore! *Good, his leg is back on. And working! Kind of.*
Ramjet: Sure you aren't. *scrambling and stumbling around, following Dirge's voice*
Dirge: Stop flailing like a spastic drone and let me look at your optics.
Ramjet: 'Bout fragging time. *plops down where he is, arms crossed over his chest*
Dirge: *heads over and kneels, looking at the optics* You're gonna need someone who can do
more then a patch job t'look at this.
Dirge: Shaddup. Do you want me to drag back to base or not?
Ramjet: *stand, a bit wobbly* Drag? Do I look like I want to suffer that kind of indignity?
Dirge: Fine. I'll carry you. Lazy slagger.
Ramjet: D< I don't need to be carried! I just need to be pointed in the right direction!
Dirge: *turns Ramjet towards the base* Just fly low and keep going until you hit metal.
Ramjet: ...I hate you.
Dirge: You said to point you in the right direction. *"|*
Ramjet: ...*siiiiiiiigh* If I fly into anything...not that it'll do much to me, but I'm blaming you.
Dirge: Fine, blame me. I'll be on your wing the whole way though. *Opticroll. Why does he
put up with this guy again?*
Ramjet: *hmphs, the transforms and takes off. Not exactly in the right direction, and a little
low*
Dirge: *Flys up next to him to give a small nudge in the right direction*
Ramjet: *startled by that* D< ! Warn me before you touch me, slagger!
Dirge: Okay! Slag, calm down. *grumbles and settles in to fly back to base*
Ramjet: I'm still going to tear your arms off.
Dirge: I bet you will. *Sarcasm!*
Ramjet:: Keep your sass up, you'll get that leg taken off again too.
Dirge: Yeah, yeah...*Goes stubbornly quiet*
Ramjet: *Uh-huh.* Guess I'll have to remove both legs so you'll be symmetrical. I can do
that.
Dirge: ...shut up.
Ramjet: Can't have my wingmate going more crazy than he already is.
Dirge: You're crazier'n I am!
Ramjet:: I am not! D< I don't mope around and organize things and write poems all day! *wobbles a bit*
Dirge: ORGANIZATION IS NOT A MENTAL DISEASE, OKAY?! *D<*
Ramjet: It is when you punch both my optics out! D<
Dirge: Okay, maybe I have a little problem....
Ramjet: A little problem? *revs his engines*
Dirge: Maybe.
Ramjet: Definitely! *swerves, trying to clip Dirge's wing. Not really sure why, as that would probably down them both, but it makes him feel better*
Dirge: Ack! *spins out a bit, managing to pull up before he hits the ground* Cut that out! Slagger.
Ramjet: *now totally going in the wrong direction* I wouldn't need to do that if you weren't so fragging crazy! Get yourself some help or something!
Dirge: You're going the wrong way, slagger. Veer right.
Dirge: And I am fine!
Ramjet: *corrects his course. Acts like he meant to go the wrong way for a bit* You are not fine!
Dirge: I so am! I am so fine, you don't even know!
Ramjet: Then I guess I'm fragging Primus himself compared to you, right?
Dirge: You wish you were as good as I was. Slagger.
Ramjet: I am twice as good as you! *wing-wobbles in agitation*
Dirge: Are not.
Ramjet: Are so.
Dirge: Are not
Ramjet: Are so. I am a superior specimen of a conehead!
Dirge: Lies.
Ramjet: It's true, and you know it!
Dirge: Lies upon lies.
Ramjet: When we get back to the base and my optics are fixed, I'll be glad to show you.
Dirge: I bet you will. *Will be locked safely in his room by then. Ha!*
Ramjet: Yes. I will tear your limbs off one by one. It will be delightful.
Dirge: I wait with bated breath. *O hay base, nice to see you. He drops down to land*
Ramjet: *is busy thinking of the many ways in which he can dismember someone and totally doesn't realize Dirge is landing*
Dirge: *Taps a foot, waiting for Ramjet to hit the base.*
Ramjet: *does so with a spectacular crash* WHAT THE FRAG! DIIIIRGE!
Dirge: *snicker* Whoops. The door is over here, smart one.
Ramjet: I am going to fragging slag you... *tries to extricate himself from the wall.
Which is hard, as he can't completely transform, but he manages after a bit of kick and flailing. He falls to the ground.*
Dirge: *reaches over to grab his boss and drag him inside to the medics*
Ramjet: D< ! I will not suffer this indignity!
Dirge: Shaddup and let me help you. *Annnd drags him inside*
Ramjet: D< ! I WILL TEAR YOU TO PIECES!
Dirge: Shut up! I'm taking you to get fixed.
Dirge: *slugs in the shoulder* :|
Ramjet:: *snort* You call that a hit? I barely felt that!
Dirge: Here. This might be better. *SHOOTS IN THE SLAGGING ARM WITH A NULLRAY*
Ramjet:: D< WELL WHAT THE SLAG DID YOU DO THAT FOR? *swipes at with his ONE WORKING ARM*
Dirge: *Punch!* You insulted my punch! D<
Ramjet:: D< I'll have you thrown in a cell for insubordination!
Dirge: You and what army, slagger?
Ramjet:: Me and myself! *jumps at with the intent to tackle him into the ground!*
Dirge: ...*takes off*
Ramjet:: D< COME BACK HERE, FRAGGER! *tries to transform, but seeing as one arm ISN'T WORKING, he can't!*
Dirge: *circles lazily* You lose, boss.
Ramjet:: I never lose! *hey, just because one arm isn't working doesn't mean the other one is dead, too! He fires his own null-ray at *
Dirge: *AGH! Hit in the fragging nose cone of all places. Tumbles out of the sky with a horrible crash*
Ramjet:: *snickers*
Dirge: Hate...you...
Dirge: *twitches*
Ramjet:: Hate you too. *walks over to . Nudges him none-too-gently with his foot*
Dirge: Slagger.
Ramjet:: >]! *victory is mine!*
Dirge: I...will...get you....*twitching*
Ramjet:: Yeah, that'll be the day. *sits down nearby*
Dirge: I...am...! I strike...terror!
Ramjet:: Oh yeah. I'm scared to my spark. *idly cleans his claws*
Dirge:...*kicks*
Ramjet: You just going to twitch me to death or what? You're as pathetic as they come, Dirge.
Dirge: *Starts standing up through SHEER FORCE OF BLOODY MINDED WILL!*
Ramjet: *Huh. Also stands.*
Dirge: *Socks in the optic* D<
Ramjet: SLAGGING PITS! *knocked onto his aft!* YOU PUNCHED OUT MY OPTIC!
Dirge: That's what you get!
Dirge: ....
Dirge: SLAG! Now you're asymmetrical!
Ramjet:: NO!
Ramjet: *tries to scramble away from his certainly insane wingmate*
Dirge: *twitches. Must...resist...urge...*
Dirge: We need to put it back in or punch the other one out. :|
Dirge: Right now.
Ramjet: *covers his punched-in optic with his hand* What do you think? >{
Dirge: Punching the other one would be easier.
Ramjet: But then I'd be blind.
Dirge: But you'd be symmetrical!
Ramjet: If I get this optic fixed, I'll be symmetrical again anyway. *edging away*
Dirge: But if I punched you, you'd be symmetrical now.
Ramjet: You punch me again, I will tear your arm off.
Dirge: You can't rip off my arm if you can't see me, though...*seriously considering his options, Ramjet, stop being an idiot. :|*
Dirge: *Armtwitch*
Ramjet:: *stomps forward* I will try to make it as painful as possible. *grin*
Dirge: ... *Opticpunch*
Ramjet:: FRAGGER! *lunges for . Totally misses*
Dirge: *Relaxes, letting out a sigh* That's much better!
Ramjet:: *stumbling around* COME HERE, YOU NEUROTIC LITTLE GLITCH!
Dirge: *Takes off and hovers* I'll stay where I am, thanks. Why don't you go find a medic and we can
talk when you've calmed down?
Ramjet:: D< How can I find a medic when I can't fragging see?! *and when is he ever calm?*
Dirge: You have a comm system. Use it. *Yeah, is gonna end up without both arms, he's pretty sure. But at least it won't be asymmetrical.*
Ramjet:: ... *tries* They aren't answering D<. *tries to figure out where is so he can shoot him down again*
Dirge: *Very quiet*
Ramjet:: *attempts to push one optic back in. Fails.* Get down here and fix my optics or I'll shoot you down! *pewpewpew!*
Dirge: *Zips to one side* Are you crazy? I'm not a medic! Besides, I'd get energon on me.
Ramjet:: *how'd he get stuck with such pathetic wingmates?* You broke them, you fix them! *pewpewpew!*
Dirge: *Not even close to being hit* Go find someone else. :|
Ramjet:: No! *hmm...heat-seeking missiles...*
Dirge: *Oh shi--! BOOM!*
Dirge: *crunch*
Dirge: *Paiiiin.*
Ramjet:: Finally. Now get over here.
Dirge: My leg is missing!
Dirge: ...I think it's over by that sand dune.
Ramjet:: Worry about that later. Drag yourself over here and fix my fragging optics already!
Dirge: My leg! *Dragging himself over towards his leg*
Ramjet:: *listening* Where are you going, you worthless pile of scrap? *carefully tries to walk toward , hoping he doesn't trip on anything*
Dirge: *scrape-drag. Scrape-drag* I need my leg!
Ramjet:: I need my optics! *stumble-stomp*
Dirge: My leeeeg! *DD8*
Ramjet:: MY optics! >[
Dirge: *Grabs his leg and starts trying to put it back on :<*
Ramjet:: What do you think you're doing?!
Dirge: Fixing myself, you slagging moron.
Ramjet:: You're supposed to fix me first! D< *oh he's mad now!*
Dirge: Shut up!
Ramjet:: Optics are more important than legs! Frag, I'm more important than you, therefore I should be repaired first!
Dirge: Shut up! Idiot... *mutters as he reattaches his leg as best he can*
Ramjet:: You're the idiot, you shut up!
Dirge:: No, YOU shut up! Slagging moron!
Ramjet: *takes a swipe at where he thinks Dirge is* Don't call me stupid! I can crush you!
Dirge: *Is in fact several feet in the oppoisite direction* If you could see, maybe!
Ramjet: *snarl* And whose fault is it that I can't see? Incompetent glitch-whore...
Dirge: Hey! Hey!
Dirge: I am not a whore! *Good, his leg is back on. And working! Kind of.*
Ramjet: Sure you aren't. *scrambling and stumbling around, following Dirge's voice*
Dirge: Stop flailing like a spastic drone and let me look at your optics.
Ramjet: 'Bout fragging time. *plops down where he is, arms crossed over his chest*
Dirge: *heads over and kneels, looking at the optics* You're gonna need someone who can do
more then a patch job t'look at this.
Dirge: Shaddup. Do you want me to drag back to base or not?
Ramjet: *stand, a bit wobbly* Drag? Do I look like I want to suffer that kind of indignity?
Dirge: Fine. I'll carry you. Lazy slagger.
Ramjet: D< I don't need to be carried! I just need to be pointed in the right direction!
Dirge: *turns Ramjet towards the base* Just fly low and keep going until you hit metal.
Ramjet: ...I hate you.
Dirge: You said to point you in the right direction. *"|*
Ramjet: ...*siiiiiiiigh* If I fly into anything...not that it'll do much to me, but I'm blaming you.
Dirge: Fine, blame me. I'll be on your wing the whole way though. *Opticroll. Why does he
put up with this guy again?*
Ramjet: *hmphs, the transforms and takes off. Not exactly in the right direction, and a little
low*
Dirge: *Flys up next to him to give a small nudge in the right direction*
Ramjet: *startled by that* D< ! Warn me before you touch me, slagger!
Dirge: Okay! Slag, calm down. *grumbles and settles in to fly back to base*
Ramjet: I'm still going to tear your arms off.
Dirge: I bet you will. *Sarcasm!*
Ramjet:: Keep your sass up, you'll get that leg taken off again too.
Dirge: Yeah, yeah...*Goes stubbornly quiet*
Ramjet: *Uh-huh.* Guess I'll have to remove both legs so you'll be symmetrical. I can do
that.
Dirge: ...shut up.
Ramjet: Can't have my wingmate going more crazy than he already is.
Dirge: You're crazier'n I am!
Ramjet:: I am not! D< I don't mope around and organize things and write poems all day! *wobbles a bit*
Dirge: ORGANIZATION IS NOT A MENTAL DISEASE, OKAY?! *D<*
Ramjet: It is when you punch both my optics out! D<
Dirge: Okay, maybe I have a little problem....
Ramjet: A little problem? *revs his engines*
Dirge: Maybe.
Ramjet: Definitely! *swerves, trying to clip Dirge's wing. Not really sure why, as that would probably down them both, but it makes him feel better*
Dirge: Ack! *spins out a bit, managing to pull up before he hits the ground* Cut that out! Slagger.
Ramjet: *now totally going in the wrong direction* I wouldn't need to do that if you weren't so fragging crazy! Get yourself some help or something!
Dirge: You're going the wrong way, slagger. Veer right.
Dirge: And I am fine!
Ramjet: *corrects his course. Acts like he meant to go the wrong way for a bit* You are not fine!
Dirge: I so am! I am so fine, you don't even know!
Ramjet: Then I guess I'm fragging Primus himself compared to you, right?
Dirge: You wish you were as good as I was. Slagger.
Ramjet: I am twice as good as you! *wing-wobbles in agitation*
Dirge: Are not.
Ramjet: Are so.
Dirge: Are not
Ramjet: Are so. I am a superior specimen of a conehead!
Dirge: Lies.
Ramjet: It's true, and you know it!
Dirge: Lies upon lies.
Ramjet: When we get back to the base and my optics are fixed, I'll be glad to show you.
Dirge: I bet you will. *Will be locked safely in his room by then. Ha!*
Ramjet: Yes. I will tear your limbs off one by one. It will be delightful.
Dirge: I wait with bated breath. *O hay base, nice to see you. He drops down to land*
Ramjet: *is busy thinking of the many ways in which he can dismember someone and totally doesn't realize Dirge is landing*
Dirge: *Taps a foot, waiting for Ramjet to hit the base.*
Ramjet: *does so with a spectacular crash* WHAT THE FRAG! DIIIIRGE!
Dirge: *snicker* Whoops. The door is over here, smart one.
Ramjet: I am going to fragging slag you... *tries to extricate himself from the wall.
Which is hard, as he can't completely transform, but he manages after a bit of kick and flailing. He falls to the ground.*
Dirge: *reaches over to grab his boss and drag him inside to the medics*
Ramjet: D< ! I will not suffer this indignity!
Dirge: Shaddup and let me help you. *Annnd drags him inside*
Ramjet: D< ! I WILL TEAR YOU TO PIECES!
Dirge: Shut up! I'm taking you to get fixed.