ZzzzZZzZzZzzz
Grog Bleh Meep Blah.
I slept for maybe an hour last night. I don't know WHAT was wrong with me, but when I went to bed, my muscles felt knotted all over, I felt bloated and weird and kinda panicky. I couldn't get comfortable even snuggled up with Ryan (which is truly bizarre), and every time I began to doze, I would jerk awake and need to reposition. Ryan says that I also kept whimpering or making crying sounds before I'd wake up. I knew I was driving him crazy, so I got up around four and went in to Roboto's room. He sleeps through anything and is good at absentmindedly patting me in his sleep. I stayed there for about an hour but realized I was just going to wake him up, too, so I staggered through the house until the sun came up, checked on Wee-Man a few unnecessary times, and then curled back up with Ryan. I finally got comfortable around six thirty, only to have to wake up a little after seven for my weekly work conference call. UGH. MISERABLE.
So now it's 10 AM, I'm off the conference, and all I want to do is crawl back into bed. I know if I do that, though, I'll just completely wreck my sleep schedule and waste the entire day. Oh, Coca-Cola, god of caffeine. Get me through this day. (Yay, more corn syrup bloat.)
Man, I don't know what was wrong with me. I was just sure I was dying.
Oh wait. Actually? More whining, on the off chance one of you can give advice. bunnybutt, I'm looking at you in particular. My effed up shoulder has been hurting again, a year after the cortisone shot that seemed to work miracles. I went to the doctor yesterday and got some prescriptions (wanting to put off another shot. I hear they're bad for you.) and have to go get an x-ray today to follow up from last year's MRI. I know surgery is imminent. I've already put off my knee surgery for a few years, and I'm not getting any younger. IF ANY OF YOU has a successful joint surgery story, please share it. All I know of are horror stories, including the one where my stepmom's brother-in-law dropped DEAD from a blood clot after knee surgery, so I am just terrified and keep procrastinating, but I'd love to just brave it out and stop hurting. Not being able to use a left arm and left leg is impeding my physical activities and proving to be a big problem in the GREAT WEIGHT GAIN of Yours Truly.
k, fine.
NOW FOR SOME HAPPY STUFF.
Last night, we went over to hang out at my new friend L2's house. Met her friend (whom I shall call) Thrax, who seems very cool, too. L2 is rad and has similar relationship horror stories to mine own. Since she has kids, I feel like we can probably relate very well on all of that. She is quick and funny and friendly and likes good music. Best of all, she seems down to earth and open/honest with a healthy sense of humor about herself... and life in general. I'm going to try not to scare her off with a super aggressive desire to adopt her for BFF status. Maybe. She's coming to my place later today with her brood, so I'm excited. I feel like a kid anticipating a playdate. Playdates with book-borrowing and word games and wine. Awesome. I've been needing that. Coming back from her place last night, I said to Ryan, "Yay, friends! And so close to home. She's like, five minutes away!" And I marveled at that. (Ryan isn't from here, and his/our friends through him live a good 45 minutes north. I just moved here a couple months ago and have only met... well, Ryan and his friends 45 mins north, or guys for dating interest, bleh.*)
Tonight is the street fair that takes place weekly, a few blocks away. The best food in the WORLD is over there, so occasionally we attend, get too full, and then walk it off at the beach and the pier. We comment on the guys fishing and listening to Johnny Cash, the fog or the moon (depending on weather), and watch the brave night-surfers wiping out in the dark sea. We hold hands.
I can't wait.
* I would be totally open to having those dating-interest guys fall into place as "just friends," especially one in particular who I really, really liked, but he is not open to hanging out with Ryan around. He feels like that's just too "weird right now," and THAT makes it feel weird to Ryan, so it is probably never going to happen. Stuff like that is interesting to me, because I know if we said we were "just friends" and I wasn't dating anyone, we'd go on hanging out and I'd think we were just friends when, apparently that isn't REALLY the case, or Ryan's existence wouldn't bug him. Does that make sense? Do you see the point I'm making, probably not very clearly? It's a bummer.
I slept for maybe an hour last night. I don't know WHAT was wrong with me, but when I went to bed, my muscles felt knotted all over, I felt bloated and weird and kinda panicky. I couldn't get comfortable even snuggled up with Ryan (which is truly bizarre), and every time I began to doze, I would jerk awake and need to reposition. Ryan says that I also kept whimpering or making crying sounds before I'd wake up. I knew I was driving him crazy, so I got up around four and went in to Roboto's room. He sleeps through anything and is good at absentmindedly patting me in his sleep. I stayed there for about an hour but realized I was just going to wake him up, too, so I staggered through the house until the sun came up, checked on Wee-Man a few unnecessary times, and then curled back up with Ryan. I finally got comfortable around six thirty, only to have to wake up a little after seven for my weekly work conference call. UGH. MISERABLE.
So now it's 10 AM, I'm off the conference, and all I want to do is crawl back into bed. I know if I do that, though, I'll just completely wreck my sleep schedule and waste the entire day. Oh, Coca-Cola, god of caffeine. Get me through this day. (Yay, more corn syrup bloat.)
Man, I don't know what was wrong with me. I was just sure I was dying.
Oh wait. Actually? More whining, on the off chance one of you can give advice. bunnybutt, I'm looking at you in particular. My effed up shoulder has been hurting again, a year after the cortisone shot that seemed to work miracles. I went to the doctor yesterday and got some prescriptions (wanting to put off another shot. I hear they're bad for you.) and have to go get an x-ray today to follow up from last year's MRI. I know surgery is imminent. I've already put off my knee surgery for a few years, and I'm not getting any younger. IF ANY OF YOU has a successful joint surgery story, please share it. All I know of are horror stories, including the one where my stepmom's brother-in-law dropped DEAD from a blood clot after knee surgery, so I am just terrified and keep procrastinating, but I'd love to just brave it out and stop hurting. Not being able to use a left arm and left leg is impeding my physical activities and proving to be a big problem in the GREAT WEIGHT GAIN of Yours Truly.
k, fine.
NOW FOR SOME HAPPY STUFF.
Last night, we went over to hang out at my new friend L2's house. Met her friend (whom I shall call) Thrax, who seems very cool, too. L2 is rad and has similar relationship horror stories to mine own. Since she has kids, I feel like we can probably relate very well on all of that. She is quick and funny and friendly and likes good music. Best of all, she seems down to earth and open/honest with a healthy sense of humor about herself... and life in general. I'm going to try not to scare her off with a super aggressive desire to adopt her for BFF status. Maybe. She's coming to my place later today with her brood, so I'm excited. I feel like a kid anticipating a playdate. Playdates with book-borrowing and word games and wine. Awesome. I've been needing that. Coming back from her place last night, I said to Ryan, "Yay, friends! And so close to home. She's like, five minutes away!" And I marveled at that. (Ryan isn't from here, and his/our friends through him live a good 45 minutes north. I just moved here a couple months ago and have only met... well, Ryan and his friends 45 mins north, or guys for dating interest, bleh.*)
Tonight is the street fair that takes place weekly, a few blocks away. The best food in the WORLD is over there, so occasionally we attend, get too full, and then walk it off at the beach and the pier. We comment on the guys fishing and listening to Johnny Cash, the fog or the moon (depending on weather), and watch the brave night-surfers wiping out in the dark sea. We hold hands.
I can't wait.
* I would be totally open to having those dating-interest guys fall into place as "just friends," especially one in particular who I really, really liked, but he is not open to hanging out with Ryan around. He feels like that's just too "weird right now," and THAT makes it feel weird to Ryan, so it is probably never going to happen. Stuff like that is interesting to me, because I know if we said we were "just friends" and I wasn't dating anyone, we'd go on hanging out and I'd think we were just friends when, apparently that isn't REALLY the case, or Ryan's existence wouldn't bug him. Does that make sense? Do you see the point I'm making, probably not very clearly? It's a bummer.