(no subject)

[cptawesome]

You know, the fact that I havent updated in about 3 weeks probably send a message to the few left who pay any attention to livejournal. The message of course, being that I totally made some idiotic rant about wanting to breathe life into this journal again, and then went off to play video games because writing is for suckers. While both of those sentiments are positively true, its actually not quite the reason why I never click that button on Semagic that says "Post Entry." I actually am just really on the fence as far as what stupid direction I want to take this unimportant blog in. I could go with the popular way of doing things, and use this journal as a cliche way to complain about things that annoy me and talk uncomfortably in-depth about real problems that I face, because its healthy to talk about those thing even if everyone who reads it thinks youre a whiny whore. I could go with the most impressive route, and just consistently post humorous stories like my last one--certainly its the method I would feel the least guilty about, since they bring joy to some and thats something that alot of livejournals fail on. Only problem is, I'm really critical of my own writing, and while I have a few stories I am just saving for posterity's sake, anything I try to write off the cuff is forced and terrible. If both of those fail, I could just be really hip and post one sentence, unexplained and occasionally cryptic entries like "People need more destructive criticism" or "My happiest dreams are set to the music in Breath of Fire III." I'd never do that, I dont think, but I find myself constantly wanting to for some reason.

What I really hate is that it's this journal and its attatched to alot of entries I'd rather noone read, and alot of stigma that livejournals aren't worth reading. I need my own website, and I need money to maintain my own website, though I do not need those things in that order.

So thats my next entry, an excuse. We'll see where it goes from here.