[Couples Therapy] 15.3 - Decisions
Deciding to put myself back out in the world was a big deal for me. It’s issues tangled up in baggage wrapped up in my own inherent fucked-up-ness...hell, it took one of my best friends metaphorically smacking me one to get me off my ass and back out there.
But I did it.
I took a chance, making myself vulnerable like that again. I basically put my heart on the line, knowing it could get broken any second. What I never expected was that my biggest fear was the wrong one...mediocrity, ladies and gentlemen. It was even worse than a bad guy, or a bad breakup. I had...just this string of miserable, bad dates, and a blind date that...
There is nothing more terrifying than taking a chance at something good, something enriching, then looking at the world and realizing that you may be resigned to a life alone after all that hoping...or worse, a life devoid of true living.
I really thought I’d made the wrong decision...and I was honestly scared that I was fucking up royal, that maybe things had been fine the way they were. Then Sam came back from “the dead” and this whole war thing started...
...and just when I needed a little hope, I found it. When I thought I was doomed, when I wanted to retreat back into my little cavern of fear, I found a little magic in a eucalyptus forest in Santa Barbara. Real magic, and I’m not talking about the kind that I felt touch me that day...I’m talking about the kind of magic I was looking for. I found it in the butterflies and the smell of the trees...
...and in the wide, dark eyes of a beautiful man by the name of MacEibhir.
Muse: Rian Baxter
Fandom: Original Character
Words: 301
Partner: Tadgh MacEibhir (gifted_hands)
[COMMENT HERE]
But I did it.
I took a chance, making myself vulnerable like that again. I basically put my heart on the line, knowing it could get broken any second. What I never expected was that my biggest fear was the wrong one...mediocrity, ladies and gentlemen. It was even worse than a bad guy, or a bad breakup. I had...just this string of miserable, bad dates, and a blind date that...
There is nothing more terrifying than taking a chance at something good, something enriching, then looking at the world and realizing that you may be resigned to a life alone after all that hoping...or worse, a life devoid of true living.
I really thought I’d made the wrong decision...and I was honestly scared that I was fucking up royal, that maybe things had been fine the way they were. Then Sam came back from “the dead” and this whole war thing started...
...and just when I needed a little hope, I found it. When I thought I was doomed, when I wanted to retreat back into my little cavern of fear, I found a little magic in a eucalyptus forest in Santa Barbara. Real magic, and I’m not talking about the kind that I felt touch me that day...I’m talking about the kind of magic I was looking for. I found it in the butterflies and the smell of the trees...
...and in the wide, dark eyes of a beautiful man by the name of MacEibhir.
Muse: Rian Baxter
Fandom: Original Character
Words: 301
Partner: Tadgh MacEibhir (gifted_hands)
[COMMENT HERE]