Ahh, Sweet Saturday...
Why, oh, why, has this week been a nightmare? I'm usually not as appreciative of my one "evening off" as I am today, but wow. I feel like I've been run over by a freight train. Work's been overwhelming, primarily because of scheduling issues. Overscheduling, that is. Yes, that's great for our profit...but who wants to go home every day feeling like they've spent 8-12 hours on a spinny ride at Kennywood? Our receptionist...now office manager, is killing me...us! Booking tech appointments that should be seen by the doctor...next to doctor appointments, bringing people into our already overly busy day for things that could wait - maybe schedule them for the next day that has next-to-nothing on the books? Having our trainer go out on a behavior visit when we're super-busy, and I've got a critical cat under my care...
Don't get me wrong. I love my job, and I love my career. But little things have been getting to me lately. I'm so easily frustrated and irritated...it's been making me think I should really go back to the doctor and restart my medication when my health insurance kicks in. I don't really want to...I mean, who wants to have to take a prescription drug to feel "normal"? I can't imagine anyone would. I certainly don't. It just seems like I have to. I've been getting pushed to my limits at work, and snapping out at Steve. We got into this big argument the other night over it...basically me being a big jerk over nothing. I don't like being so moody. It's not fair for me to take it out on him, or anyone else for that matter.
Why can't my brain just be freaking NORMAL?! I've been off my Rx for well over a year now and have done fine. But the past couple weeks, I've been...well, a bitch. For a lack of better words. I don't want to be like that. Deep down, the core of me, I know I'm a sweet, considerate, empathetic person with a lot to contribute to society. This person that's been coming from the shell of me recently...is not me.
I really don't want to go back on meds. Maybe I can ride it out, try to control my emotions on my own...I really hope so. I don't want to be this person, nor do I want people to think that this is the way that I am.
In other news, it keeps snowing, and I'm about sick of it. Granted, this is the first winter of my entire life that has been essentially entirely covered in snow. That does make it better, in a way. It's beautiful outside, instead of the dreary dead plant life that we usually see. But I'm sick of the cold, sick of cleaning my car off, and sick of not cleaning my car off enough and trying to drive 10 miles with icy windshield wipers that don't do jack. I bought a new battery for my remote starter/unlocker (what else do you call it?) today. The thing's been dead for longer than I can remember, and I've just got it fixed near the end of winter. Procrastinator, anyone? At least I can unlock it without using the key again. The other day my locks froze for the first time ever. I had to find an extension cord and the heat gun to get them open, as I tried desperately to get ahold of anyone at work...no one was answering! Kathy called me back, at least...just after I'd unfrozen the driver's side.
It's come to my attention that I'm rambling again. Not that it matters, it's my journal...so who cares? But for my own sake, I'll stop now.
Until next time...
Don't get me wrong. I love my job, and I love my career. But little things have been getting to me lately. I'm so easily frustrated and irritated...it's been making me think I should really go back to the doctor and restart my medication when my health insurance kicks in. I don't really want to...I mean, who wants to have to take a prescription drug to feel "normal"? I can't imagine anyone would. I certainly don't. It just seems like I have to. I've been getting pushed to my limits at work, and snapping out at Steve. We got into this big argument the other night over it...basically me being a big jerk over nothing. I don't like being so moody. It's not fair for me to take it out on him, or anyone else for that matter.
Why can't my brain just be freaking NORMAL?! I've been off my Rx for well over a year now and have done fine. But the past couple weeks, I've been...well, a bitch. For a lack of better words. I don't want to be like that. Deep down, the core of me, I know I'm a sweet, considerate, empathetic person with a lot to contribute to society. This person that's been coming from the shell of me recently...is not me.
I really don't want to go back on meds. Maybe I can ride it out, try to control my emotions on my own...I really hope so. I don't want to be this person, nor do I want people to think that this is the way that I am.
In other news, it keeps snowing, and I'm about sick of it. Granted, this is the first winter of my entire life that has been essentially entirely covered in snow. That does make it better, in a way. It's beautiful outside, instead of the dreary dead plant life that we usually see. But I'm sick of the cold, sick of cleaning my car off, and sick of not cleaning my car off enough and trying to drive 10 miles with icy windshield wipers that don't do jack. I bought a new battery for my remote starter/unlocker (what else do you call it?) today. The thing's been dead for longer than I can remember, and I've just got it fixed near the end of winter. Procrastinator, anyone? At least I can unlock it without using the key again. The other day my locks froze for the first time ever. I had to find an extension cord and the heat gun to get them open, as I tried desperately to get ahold of anyone at work...no one was answering! Kathy called me back, at least...just after I'd unfrozen the driver's side.
It's come to my attention that I'm rambling again. Not that it matters, it's my journal...so who cares? But for my own sake, I'll stop now.
Until next time...