(no subject)
YES. I made it through the week without killing myself. AND I kept a smile on my face the whole time. GEEEEE.
Kind of sucks that all of my friends had break this week, and well.... I didn't. OH WELL.
I had thought for a while that I wasn't hanging out with my "group" of friends a lot lately, but I think I realized that nobody has hung out with the "group" lately either. We are all kind of doing our own thing. It is kind of shitty but as long as all of my girls are happy its good, right?
I ALSO realized that if I had to hang out with me, I would find myself annoying. Haha yes, I think that I can be annoying. I tend to tell too many stories, often repeating some. I either sit in the corner alone, or I'm the center of attention. No pretty medium. Maybe I need to work on that.... hmm.
Its wierd not being comfortable with friends. Feeling as if you don't belong, they don't want you there, you don't know anything about them, they don't know anything about you. It is not normal. I mean, I know that I have never had a "best friend" but at least I've had people that know everything about me and want me to be with them. This is the furthest I have pushed myself from society and I'm not used to it. I can't exactly back track now though.
Well, anyways, I need to go out tonight and have some FUN. Sunday will be the beginning of another week of hell, well mini-hell. So tonight, well tonight I am going to have fun and relax and do NOTHING productive, whether its alone, or with aquaintances.
Kind of sucks that all of my friends had break this week, and well.... I didn't. OH WELL.
I had thought for a while that I wasn't hanging out with my "group" of friends a lot lately, but I think I realized that nobody has hung out with the "group" lately either. We are all kind of doing our own thing. It is kind of shitty but as long as all of my girls are happy its good, right?
I ALSO realized that if I had to hang out with me, I would find myself annoying. Haha yes, I think that I can be annoying. I tend to tell too many stories, often repeating some. I either sit in the corner alone, or I'm the center of attention. No pretty medium. Maybe I need to work on that.... hmm.
Its wierd not being comfortable with friends. Feeling as if you don't belong, they don't want you there, you don't know anything about them, they don't know anything about you. It is not normal. I mean, I know that I have never had a "best friend" but at least I've had people that know everything about me and want me to be with them. This is the furthest I have pushed myself from society and I'm not used to it. I can't exactly back track now though.
Well, anyways, I need to go out tonight and have some FUN. Sunday will be the beginning of another week of hell, well mini-hell. So tonight, well tonight I am going to have fun and relax and do NOTHING productive, whether its alone, or with aquaintances.