We are all elitist doom-porn junky scumsacks now.
Land of free, cheap, or at least easily obtainable on the black market loses Jesse Helms, half-million acres to fire, 3 million to water. (Water, therefore, kicks fire's ass when it comes to destroying corn and/or chicken farms.) Also, several people heartbroken at tragic loss of obnoxiously long-lived Senator from somewhere they have only two religions: Baptism and football.
Anyone who is surprised, please leave the room and hang yourself with a giant Twizzler rope.
Anyone who is surprised, please leave the room and hang yourself with a giant Twizzler rope.