I'm honestly so annoying.
You're worth the Fight.
I've been trying not to think about you and how you're not here and that has only made me think about you more.
I threw your jacket to the other side of the room just because I didn't want to think about how you wore it all the time it doesnt help at all, yet every morning I wake up and I'm clinging onto it.
I feel like some sort of lost love sick puppy. It's scary and annoying and I don't understand it at all.
2 and a half months of finally being together.
but 4 years of loving you. Yet we argue. Yet we get embarrased. Yet both of us get jealous over those, not even a threat.
I am so glad you've gotten the chance to go there, get away from your family, get away from stress and hell maybe a chance to get away from me and just chill out and live. I felt completely selfish for a while though, not wanting you to go, yet never actually saying it. I was, and still am happy for you.
I can honestly say, you are the best thing, thats happend to me. I may not always show it,
and you'll never see this entry, thank the lord.
But I try to show you the best I can.
I feel so sick with myself, because I know good things never last but I just want it to. I want your beautiful brown eyes to look at me the same way forever..
Me and you, you and I because that is pure and true happiness. We've talked about how completely confortable it is to say "in a few years" "when we are married" when this and when that but it's also scary to do this again.. to have plans, and then sudden changes occur. It won't be me to leave.
In my most vunerable time, in my state of weakness and distrust of all being, you were there and I could still feel comfortable in your embrace and no others. You, the one I can trust.
[XxguitarjunkixX:i love you, and always will, the way you are, i would never try to change you for you are perfect, hell, more than perfect for me.
XxguitarjunkixX:sleep well my little angel, ill be waiting for you when the sun rises]
I want this to last.
I want to go see you today, when you get back, but... I know your family is going to want to get out of there as fast as possible and it really is her time with you, not mine. I love you though..
and I miss you..