Emo Friday
I have this problem. It's called listening to music and remembering everything. Good things. Bad things. Everything. I was listening to the old ATL and BR cd's when I remembered how life used to be. I wasn't that comfortable in the scene. I wasn't talking to BR. And I sure as hell didn't get recognized. It made me think of all the little times. Back when I only slightly talked to James and Alex. That was it. Nothing else. To tell you the truth, I kind of miss that. When I was just another fan, I had always wanted to be their friend. Now that I'm their friend, I miss just getting a "Hello" to feel special. "Failing Atlas" sparked a special emotion in me. My first though was, "Oh my God... Gino." That was soon followed by, "I remember when I really liked James." Third thought, when he dedicated it to me. And the final memory that came was the most important to me. All the times James has been there for me. Even when we weren't good friends. Like that time at the all day Rock Without Reason. I was upset and really close to crying and then James came over and sat next to me. He made me feel so special. He actually cared, unlike everyone else. Things have just changed... So much. I want things to be like they used to. No drama. No regret. Just... ecstacy. Knowing that I mattered... I'm not so sure about that anymore. Everything's different. I want those times back... And guess what? It'll never happen.